(no subject)
goddamnit. still tired
went to bed at midnight, but fell asleep way past 2am. then i was awake at 10, couldnt get back to sleep, very restless night
worked today, 12-4. staff meeting at 6. basically, we were all told that if any of us screws up in the slightest way again, we're fired. wasn't too excited about that. but went to the gym afterwards. felt so good to get my fat ass exercising again. need to lose weight desperately
certain things have been weighing on my shoulders for a while now. i've been checking out biographies of the band fall out boy, in particular pete wentz. and i'm so jealous because he's everything i want to be, and probably will NEVER be. he's a talented lyricist in a world-famous band, and he owns his own business making clothes and such. that is exactly where i want to be. i'm a fantastic singer and i want to be performing infront of massive crowds where i belong, and i'm a genius business whiz. i have designs and ideas coming out of my ass, i know how to run a successful business and be a great manager, i know how to market things and i know the market itself. i even have a name for my business already!
but the closest thing to reaching any of these dreams at the moment, is trying to sell about a dozen necklaces i've made already at the local market. and you'll all say, "you have to start somewhere" and all those old cliches, but that's not good enough for me. in the immortal words of veruca salt, "i want it NOW!!!"
it's just really getting me down. i HAVE to make my business work, i HAVE to be a fantastic singer, and i HAVE to be famous, for either performance or my successful business
it's breaking my little emo heart. *ugh*
went to bed at midnight, but fell asleep way past 2am. then i was awake at 10, couldnt get back to sleep, very restless night
worked today, 12-4. staff meeting at 6. basically, we were all told that if any of us screws up in the slightest way again, we're fired. wasn't too excited about that. but went to the gym afterwards. felt so good to get my fat ass exercising again. need to lose weight desperately
certain things have been weighing on my shoulders for a while now. i've been checking out biographies of the band fall out boy, in particular pete wentz. and i'm so jealous because he's everything i want to be, and probably will NEVER be. he's a talented lyricist in a world-famous band, and he owns his own business making clothes and such. that is exactly where i want to be. i'm a fantastic singer and i want to be performing infront of massive crowds where i belong, and i'm a genius business whiz. i have designs and ideas coming out of my ass, i know how to run a successful business and be a great manager, i know how to market things and i know the market itself. i even have a name for my business already!
but the closest thing to reaching any of these dreams at the moment, is trying to sell about a dozen necklaces i've made already at the local market. and you'll all say, "you have to start somewhere" and all those old cliches, but that's not good enough for me. in the immortal words of veruca salt, "i want it NOW!!!"
it's just really getting me down. i HAVE to make my business work, i HAVE to be a fantastic singer, and i HAVE to be famous, for either performance or my successful business
it's breaking my little emo heart. *ugh*