i apologize if this seems really emo
im such a jealous person, i seriously dont get it.
i am jealous of people i cannot have.
i am jealous of people i dont even want!
wtf..is wrong with me.
someone slap me please!
they kiss and hold each other, right in front of me...like they're putting on a show, to see how much they can stir me.
sometimes they glance over at me and smile.
i want to throw up.
not in a 'oh gross' way, but in a way that comes from the pit of my stomach, and is triggered by the fact that i dont have someone to love like that, and i dont know why.
WHY.
maybe its cause i dont try hard enough....but SHOULD i have to TRY? like seriously. isnt the guy suposed to find you?
i mean i was always told to just sit there and let things happen...
but things arent happening!
blah this existance is boring me.
the summer looks promising though, and should be full of new adventures....