i'm going through changes
After a continuing downward spiral of unhappiness and misery that has gotten worse and worse and worse over the past year or two I have taken the first steps towards sorting my life out. It's a gamble, a pretty big gamble, but I feel really good for having taken some decisive action. I'm now a trainee driving instructor. Had induction interviews yesterday, everything worked out really well so I paid my deposit and left quite the happy camper. Until I realised I can't really afford that deposit. And look like having the most impoverished month of my life ahead of me! Either way - I don't give a shit. I'm not really too daunted by the prospect of the training and the assessments and whatnot - the way I see it - I'm spending a lot of money on this so I'm going to make sure I do it right. There is a pretty high risk that I could blow my exams (you have three strikes and you're out, or back to the beginning of the training anyway) and be no further forward, but I'm just really excited at the prospect of it all. I'm planning on having a chat with my boss about all of this at some point in the next couple of days. I know he'll think I'm insane but he can go and bollocks. I plan to tell him the reasons why I'm doing this thing too - i.e. have been so chronically unhappy, every day better than the one that follows it etc. I'm hoping, of course, that he's going to say - oh well why don't I try to swing you some redundancy and we'll keep this conversation on the downlow. Somehow I don't see that happening though. So - I am terrified as I think I am in severe financial dire straits for the next couple of months - but elated because now my work worries have dropped off the radar. Knowing there's a 99% chance I'm leaving before the end of this year has lifted that particular cloud. Plus, the driving instructor thing looks ideal for my lifestyle in that you determine exactly when and how much you will work once you qualify. So if I need to take off for a weekend of gigs some place, then I can do, no sweat. The woman who interviewed me was even telling me all the little tax swindles you can get away with. So my mood is greatly improved, but I'm eating Aldi beans for the next 2 months days.
had a matadors gig last night at the fenton - we played with le faro, from belfast ( i think). jesus they were good! just totally tight off-kilter rocky slightly shellacy with amazing drumming. it's ace when a band catches you by surprise! shame there were only about ten paying customers at the gig. really enjoyed the matadors set too - possibly the best we've ever played actually. had mercy suite practice earlier in the night and had struggled so badly, but in fairness - i'd gone straight to rehearsal from work and hadn't eaten and was stressed about the cashflow problem. anyway... bollocks... got mercy suite gig tonight and don't really plan on sticking around - think i will busy myself with getting cozy in my room, candlelit bath and a glass of wine, all that jive. can't be doing with stupid punk rock gigs.
my body is aching all over today - went to the gym on monday night and did a straight hour on the treadmill. did about 8k which is the most i've ever done in one go. didn't feel the burn yesterday - but jesus i am feeling it today. i kinda like it in that weird smug way though. think i will go for the repeat tomorrow.
so anyhoo... who wants free driving lessons? apparently i'm encouraged to practice on my friends, and the way i see it - if some of you lot let steve byrne loose on you with a tattoo needle during his apprenticeship then you'll let me try to teach you to bloody drive!!!
had a matadors gig last night at the fenton - we played with le faro, from belfast ( i think). jesus they were good! just totally tight off-kilter rocky slightly shellacy with amazing drumming. it's ace when a band catches you by surprise! shame there were only about ten paying customers at the gig. really enjoyed the matadors set too - possibly the best we've ever played actually. had mercy suite practice earlier in the night and had struggled so badly, but in fairness - i'd gone straight to rehearsal from work and hadn't eaten and was stressed about the cashflow problem. anyway... bollocks... got mercy suite gig tonight and don't really plan on sticking around - think i will busy myself with getting cozy in my room, candlelit bath and a glass of wine, all that jive. can't be doing with stupid punk rock gigs.
my body is aching all over today - went to the gym on monday night and did a straight hour on the treadmill. did about 8k which is the most i've ever done in one go. didn't feel the burn yesterday - but jesus i am feeling it today. i kinda like it in that weird smug way though. think i will go for the repeat tomorrow.
so anyhoo... who wants free driving lessons? apparently i'm encouraged to practice on my friends, and the way i see it - if some of you lot let steve byrne loose on you with a tattoo needle during his apprenticeship then you'll let me try to teach you to bloody drive!!!