Breaking Through.
You hate all my friends.
Kae's words, not mine. Not true. I've mulled this over time and again, and most of those I've met, I've liked; it's every bit as inaccurate as saying that I disliked most of the female Couriers.
But all the ones I like, he's losing-
The man I'm waiting for is not Kae's friend.
World's End Tavern is as close to true neutral ground as it comes. Kylene has a mug coming my way almost before I've settled into the seat, and I've got a round waiting for the one who's soon to join me. My hands need something to do. A cigarillo rolls between them, not yet lit, and I try to ignore the fact that I can't quite feel the nuances of its texture.
Not much time to think on this. There's been enough time to plan my words and steel my nerves. There he comes. Game's on.
He moves like a cat. I'd know that feral wariness anywhere. It's the smooth, rolling gait of a predator in unfamiliar territory. No attempts at hiding his body language, heart on his sleeve, along with the story of his life in ink: he's on edge. Well. I suppose that puts us closer to even ground.
Sitting in the back with his back to the wall. Took a corner so there's a seat across from him where I can keep my back to the wall too. He's watching me like he's sizing me up, like he knows I'm sizing him up. Got a drink waiting for me, that's nice and all, doesn't prove he ain't gonna set me on fire.
Yeah I know the look he's trying to hide there. Disdain. Well-bred fucks like this ginger beanpole always look at me like that, even the ones that left Silvermoon. At least fuckin' chair's comfortable and the booze is strong.
"Right. Let's do this so Kae'll shut the fuck up."
Well that's a charming introduction. It isn't as though I was expecting civility; surely he can't think coarse language will shock me. No, it's simply his means of communication. Part of the display. His tone is nearly sullen, diction chosen to indicate that he isn't here by choice. Interesting.
"If there's to be an accord between the two of us it won't c-come by rushing things," I point out. "Thank you for coming. ...I'll be perf-fectly honest with you, Nathrae. Nothing I c-could have rehearsed would m-move us forward, so let's cut the shit. What happened w-was years ago and my lovers t-tell me, they swear up and down that you're n-not quite the same person we f-fought against back then."
That dubious expression and deceptively-defensive slouch don't change - but his attention shifts when I light my smoke. "They've also t-told me that you actively s-subverted Malanior's orders to lessen th-the casualties."
Ha. Sure. You can cuss too, Courier, that's nice. He's holding back the stutter. Not perfect but he's just about pulled it off. Smells like peacebloom and goldclover. Mild shit but smooth as a baby's ass if you're not looking to get trashed. Wonder if he's got more. "Wot, you 'fink I weren't well aware of 'ow batshit 'e wos? Didn't take long t'figure that one out. Didn't want most'a ya dead, Oriseus. Suffer, mebbe. Killing 'Orde ain't my 'fing."
Don't they fucking understand that yet?! If I had something to throw at him I would. And I can just hear Khaavren now bitching me out for throwing shit in his boy's face but I don't wanna be here, I don't wanna listen to this skinny fuck talking about my past like it's some great fucking revelation and now suddenly he understands-
"No let's get summat straight between me an' you. Y'don't know shit about me, fer one, and fer seconds they're on'y 'alf right."
slam the drink, on my feet, wanna go wanna go wanna get out of here
"I'm the same bloke from back then but I'm trying not to be."
That's more progress than he might admit. There's a nervous energy building up in him and it's catching, making my hands and legs restless. Kyrene's back with a second round. She exchanges a glance with the rogue; even acting like a caged animal pacing at the bars he gives her the sort of look at leads straight to the bedroom. Little wonder Khaav and Kae find themselves so exasperated with this boy. He's every bit as unbalanced as me without the presence of mind to even himself out with drugs.
Not the right sort, anyway. I can smell felweed, bloodthistle and Gromsblood on him. If he's self-medicating it isn't to calm himself down.
"And th-that's why we're here." Yes, little snake, eyes over here. "I don't know you. But if Khaavren th-thinks you're worth knowing, I'd l-like to trust his judgment. So have a seat, have an-nother drink and a smoke on me, and let's talk."
And damn me for a fool, I do.
Kae's words, not mine. Not true. I've mulled this over time and again, and most of those I've met, I've liked; it's every bit as inaccurate as saying that I disliked most of the female Couriers.
But all the ones I like, he's losing-
The man I'm waiting for is not Kae's friend.
World's End Tavern is as close to true neutral ground as it comes. Kylene has a mug coming my way almost before I've settled into the seat, and I've got a round waiting for the one who's soon to join me. My hands need something to do. A cigarillo rolls between them, not yet lit, and I try to ignore the fact that I can't quite feel the nuances of its texture.
Not much time to think on this. There's been enough time to plan my words and steel my nerves. There he comes. Game's on.
He moves like a cat. I'd know that feral wariness anywhere. It's the smooth, rolling gait of a predator in unfamiliar territory. No attempts at hiding his body language, heart on his sleeve, along with the story of his life in ink: he's on edge. Well. I suppose that puts us closer to even ground.
Sitting in the back with his back to the wall. Took a corner so there's a seat across from him where I can keep my back to the wall too. He's watching me like he's sizing me up, like he knows I'm sizing him up. Got a drink waiting for me, that's nice and all, doesn't prove he ain't gonna set me on fire.
Yeah I know the look he's trying to hide there. Disdain. Well-bred fucks like this ginger beanpole always look at me like that, even the ones that left Silvermoon. At least fuckin' chair's comfortable and the booze is strong.
"Right. Let's do this so Kae'll shut the fuck up."
Well that's a charming introduction. It isn't as though I was expecting civility; surely he can't think coarse language will shock me. No, it's simply his means of communication. Part of the display. His tone is nearly sullen, diction chosen to indicate that he isn't here by choice. Interesting.
"If there's to be an accord between the two of us it won't c-come by rushing things," I point out. "Thank you for coming. ...I'll be perf-fectly honest with you, Nathrae. Nothing I c-could have rehearsed would m-move us forward, so let's cut the shit. What happened w-was years ago and my lovers t-tell me, they swear up and down that you're n-not quite the same person we f-fought against back then."
That dubious expression and deceptively-defensive slouch don't change - but his attention shifts when I light my smoke. "They've also t-told me that you actively s-subverted Malanior's orders to lessen th-the casualties."
Ha. Sure. You can cuss too, Courier, that's nice. He's holding back the stutter. Not perfect but he's just about pulled it off. Smells like peacebloom and goldclover. Mild shit but smooth as a baby's ass if you're not looking to get trashed. Wonder if he's got more. "Wot, you 'fink I weren't well aware of 'ow batshit 'e wos? Didn't take long t'figure that one out. Didn't want most'a ya dead, Oriseus. Suffer, mebbe. Killing 'Orde ain't my 'fing."
Don't they fucking understand that yet?! If I had something to throw at him I would. And I can just hear Khaavren now bitching me out for throwing shit in his boy's face but I don't wanna be here, I don't wanna listen to this skinny fuck talking about my past like it's some great fucking revelation and now suddenly he understands-
"No let's get summat straight between me an' you. Y'don't know shit about me, fer one, and fer seconds they're on'y 'alf right."
slam the drink, on my feet, wanna go wanna go wanna get out of here
"I'm the same bloke from back then but I'm trying not to be."
That's more progress than he might admit. There's a nervous energy building up in him and it's catching, making my hands and legs restless. Kyrene's back with a second round. She exchanges a glance with the rogue; even acting like a caged animal pacing at the bars he gives her the sort of look at leads straight to the bedroom. Little wonder Khaav and Kae find themselves so exasperated with this boy. He's every bit as unbalanced as me without the presence of mind to even himself out with drugs.
Not the right sort, anyway. I can smell felweed, bloodthistle and Gromsblood on him. If he's self-medicating it isn't to calm himself down.
"And th-that's why we're here." Yes, little snake, eyes over here. "I don't know you. But if Khaavren th-thinks you're worth knowing, I'd l-like to trust his judgment. So have a seat, have an-nother drink and a smoke on me, and let's talk."
And damn me for a fool, I do.