who do you tell it to?

[origamiqueen]

who do you play with upon the shore:?
will i ever find it?

i've never felt so unwanted
so unwelcome.
i do not. will not. ever. play fucking games.
i have a fucking proposal waiting for me....do i take it. no.
i chase after shit i am so far above..

what is wrong with me. am i sick? gross? distorted?
i try to be the most real i can possibly be .
apparently real is not attractive.

i feel like my time is so thin. i know there is a ton ahead of me but i cannot see past the next two hours.
i miss so much.
i am a contradiction inside my head.