I AM SO TIRED
I wish that there where days i could step out of my life, just leave. Right now I have so many issues that I am trying to work through. I am learning what love truely is. I am in dier need of a good friend one i trust with it all. One who wont freak out or try to fix my crazy life. People see me and the lack of stability that I am and feel like that need to come in amd fix me. What people have a hard time understanding is that not being home is peobably one of the best things in my life. It shows me so much it helps me.
Anyways, I have such a desire to know my father but most of the time it just feels so impossible. It is kinda weird because we live to together and he takes me to school most days but I do not know him. I have no idea about his walk with Christ or anything of that sort. If you know me farely well you know that these past few years with him have been kinda bumpy and just a little strange. I just always want him to know how muvh I love hime how I desire to know him for him to know me for us to know God together. It breaks my heart to say that I dont know my dad and he does not know me and in a year I will be leaving for a school that is eight hours away. I dont think I can fully express the emotions that are all racing through my mind. Well anyways I think what I truely desire is a friendone i can express all this to with no fear.
In other news I saw matt T yesterday that was kinda nice. I have a wedding to go to on saturday and I leave for camp on monday. well this is life and this is me. take me or leave me. I desire change in my life i desire for God to mold me in amazing ways who knows what tomorrow may bring. better yet who knows what today already has.
Anyways, I have such a desire to know my father but most of the time it just feels so impossible. It is kinda weird because we live to together and he takes me to school most days but I do not know him. I have no idea about his walk with Christ or anything of that sort. If you know me farely well you know that these past few years with him have been kinda bumpy and just a little strange. I just always want him to know how muvh I love hime how I desire to know him for him to know me for us to know God together. It breaks my heart to say that I dont know my dad and he does not know me and in a year I will be leaving for a school that is eight hours away. I dont think I can fully express the emotions that are all racing through my mind. Well anyways I think what I truely desire is a friendone i can express all this to with no fear.
In other news I saw matt T yesterday that was kinda nice. I have a wedding to go to on saturday and I leave for camp on monday. well this is life and this is me. take me or leave me. I desire change in my life i desire for God to mold me in amazing ways who knows what tomorrow may bring. better yet who knows what today already has.