Ashley is a major Basketcase today
She is simple yet confusing, her sparkling eyes make me forget my words(the same song over and over in my head)
So I'm just sitting here and start crying. For no reason most likely. Just tired. I mean its not like I have had time to sit down and sit and think about what the hell is going on in my life. I wake up get ready for school, finish homework, go to school, either go to work right after or come home do homework and then go to work, either way I'm home at 8 or 10, I finish homework, and if I have not fallen asleep at 1 in the morning with a book in my lap I check my email and crap. Then I wake up and do it all over. I work every weekend. Saturday for 8 hours and most sundays too.
Then my Dad sends me a card for my birthday with a check. Some crap about his girlfriend wanting to meet me since it has been over a year since they have been together. Then he basically says any problems call me I will send money because that fixes everything.
Then I remembered its been like 2 years since I have seen Chris the one thing that made since in my life. The one guy in my life that was there for me, and then i realized that he is now 20 on august. That brings up the whole issue of what would have happend had he not been sent to military school and then moved. I met him when I was 14 he was 17. We knew it couldnt work yet he was one of the few guys that could just look at me and tell what was wrong and say a few words and calmed me.
Plus my psycho family has me so stressed out. My grandpa's getting divorced, because he cheated on my stepgrandma with a bar whore that is like 15 years younger than him. My great grandma is just plain evil. My uncle married a sociopath. My great uncle is living with a women that has some issues. Belives her son had the right to try to kill his girlfriend (which by the way is my stepdad's bookeeper). My great grandma sides with her on this.
That is really long, but i needed to get it out. My lip quit twitching. I'm still crying and listening to the same song over and over. I came to realize that I'm a relationship consuler that makes all her advice based on watching everyone else. It seems to work though. I dont use any of my experinces because my life is nothing but a screwed up relationship followed by another.
So I'm just sitting here and start crying. For no reason most likely. Just tired. I mean its not like I have had time to sit down and sit and think about what the hell is going on in my life. I wake up get ready for school, finish homework, go to school, either go to work right after or come home do homework and then go to work, either way I'm home at 8 or 10, I finish homework, and if I have not fallen asleep at 1 in the morning with a book in my lap I check my email and crap. Then I wake up and do it all over. I work every weekend. Saturday for 8 hours and most sundays too.
Then my Dad sends me a card for my birthday with a check. Some crap about his girlfriend wanting to meet me since it has been over a year since they have been together. Then he basically says any problems call me I will send money because that fixes everything.
Then I remembered its been like 2 years since I have seen Chris the one thing that made since in my life. The one guy in my life that was there for me, and then i realized that he is now 20 on august. That brings up the whole issue of what would have happend had he not been sent to military school and then moved. I met him when I was 14 he was 17. We knew it couldnt work yet he was one of the few guys that could just look at me and tell what was wrong and say a few words and calmed me.
Plus my psycho family has me so stressed out. My grandpa's getting divorced, because he cheated on my stepgrandma with a bar whore that is like 15 years younger than him. My great grandma is just plain evil. My uncle married a sociopath. My great uncle is living with a women that has some issues. Belives her son had the right to try to kill his girlfriend (which by the way is my stepdad's bookeeper). My great grandma sides with her on this.
That is really long, but i needed to get it out. My lip quit twitching. I'm still crying and listening to the same song over and over. I came to realize that I'm a relationship consuler that makes all her advice based on watching everyone else. It seems to work though. I dont use any of my experinces because my life is nothing but a screwed up relationship followed by another.