(no subject)
Bad thoughts, bad thoughts
We got caught.
I don't know if I'm really surprised. I am in a way, but I'm not surprised that the gas bill is what got us. I feel guilty, like I talked her into coming up here, but, of course, she denies this. I can kind of tell she might not be exactly pleased with our conversation. It was kind of uneasy...I mean, what can I say? The little remarks, or lack thereof, in some cases, let me know that she's unhappy with me about something. I know it'll blow over - of course it will. But, in the meantime, it's a miserable place to be. I would be willing to bet, based on a year of field research, that part of her unhappiness with me is a result of frustration and self-doubt and has nothing to do with me directly. I'm ok with taking the brunt of that; however, I do wish that I wasn't so powerless. I just want to make things ok again. The usual.
And, I won't be able to go to Katie's house until ... never.
We got caught.
I don't know if I'm really surprised. I am in a way, but I'm not surprised that the gas bill is what got us. I feel guilty, like I talked her into coming up here, but, of course, she denies this. I can kind of tell she might not be exactly pleased with our conversation. It was kind of uneasy...I mean, what can I say? The little remarks, or lack thereof, in some cases, let me know that she's unhappy with me about something. I know it'll blow over - of course it will. But, in the meantime, it's a miserable place to be. I would be willing to bet, based on a year of field research, that part of her unhappiness with me is a result of frustration and self-doubt and has nothing to do with me directly. I'm ok with taking the brunt of that; however, I do wish that I wasn't so powerless. I just want to make things ok again. The usual.
And, I won't be able to go to Katie's house until ... never.