what does this mean..?
you and i were together. i don't know how but we just were. but it wasn't unusual that we were together. we were in the mall and we were going to some computer hardware shop. i don't know why but we just were. i think you had to buy something.
you were in a hurry and i was sort of getting left behind. in my attempt NOT to get left behind, i reached out for your hand and pulled. after pulling, you sort of slowed down. the thing is, i didn't let go of your hand even when you actually slowed down.
alanganin yung paghawak ko sa kamay mo. i wasn't even really holding your hand - more like just 2 or 3 fingers. alanganin in the sense that i didn't know whether i should let go already or not. but you didn't let go of my hand. so i didn't let go of yours.
here's the kicker: kinilig ako. even before actually touching your hand, the thought of holding on to it while i was just reaching out for it made my heart beat faster. and the fact that you didn't let go made the feeling - whatever it was i was feeling - even more intense.
we were already inside the store and we were still holding each other's hands.
then, i woke up.
this bothers me, even though it was all a dream. shouldn't it bother me because it was just that? my subconscious? what does this mean?? i'm not confused, don't get me wrong. i know who i love and i love him. i don't want to overanalyze (but i think i'm doing just that >_<) things.
but i can't shrug off the feeling that i'm doing something wrong for dreaming such a thing. it's silly, i know. i didn't MEAN to dream it, it just became that scene. but i guess it's a dream for a reason - i just don't want the reason to be that i like him - again. because i do not.
i hope it just means i miss hanging out with him. period.
you were in a hurry and i was sort of getting left behind. in my attempt NOT to get left behind, i reached out for your hand and pulled. after pulling, you sort of slowed down. the thing is, i didn't let go of your hand even when you actually slowed down.
alanganin yung paghawak ko sa kamay mo. i wasn't even really holding your hand - more like just 2 or 3 fingers. alanganin in the sense that i didn't know whether i should let go already or not. but you didn't let go of my hand. so i didn't let go of yours.
here's the kicker: kinilig ako. even before actually touching your hand, the thought of holding on to it while i was just reaching out for it made my heart beat faster. and the fact that you didn't let go made the feeling - whatever it was i was feeling - even more intense.
we were already inside the store and we were still holding each other's hands.
then, i woke up.
this bothers me, even though it was all a dream. shouldn't it bother me because it was just that? my subconscious? what does this mean?? i'm not confused, don't get me wrong. i know who i love and i love him. i don't want to overanalyze (but i think i'm doing just that >_<) things.
but i can't shrug off the feeling that i'm doing something wrong for dreaming such a thing. it's silly, i know. i didn't MEAN to dream it, it just became that scene. but i guess it's a dream for a reason - i just don't want the reason to be that i like him - again. because i do not.
i hope it just means i miss hanging out with him. period.