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I remember a small while back, when I went to bed one evening after having a serious conversation (one of the very many) with David, I sat up in bed and had sort of an "epiphany" within myself--my heart, soul, and mind. We had been discussing our financial life and the decisions we both planned on making to better our future together as a couple soon to be married.
I sat up in bed before he turned the lights out, and I just became overwhelmed with this feeling...I can't really describe it better than it was a feeling that I knew what I wanted to DO! It wasn't at all a silly whim of the moment, you know, the ones that usually rush through my brain a million miles a minute, because I'm always thinking about something........I sat up in bed and said outloud, "David, I want to help people, I want to bring a smile to someone's face, I want to give of my heart, I want to be able to be myself around people and not fear of being written up for it, I want to work in something like Social Services or something LIKE that, and of course, be paid for it." I was very impressed with myself for pulling my life together like this, I'm afterall, twenty-six years old as of this past November, and I don't want my life to just rush past me without feeling like someone who's accomplished some kind of outreach that made someone's life a little better. I help people now as it is, and I gotta tell ya, it's a beautiful feeling, I love to give of myself in any way that I can (and not to mention, decently).
It's looking up for me, slowly but surely. I have a new friend, her name is Diamond Kelly, and she's working for this establishment called Turning Point down in Newburyport. She knows how unhappy & stifled I am at CVS, and thought that this place would be a perfect place for me to spread my wings and REALLY fly into being the kind of person I've always been wanting to be. I think she's right on the money, and I'm really excited about this. (!!!!!!!!!!) I'm going to push myself (but not too hard) to get this job. I don't need to "turn the charm on", because I possess it naturally, or so I've been told...I'm beginning to believe certain influential people, and give up on self-doubt and those that pull me down into the muck where I really don't belong. The benefits at this place seem to be very good, and I'm very interested in becoming who I want to be, maybe doing this for the rest of my life, or whatever life's path brings me to.
I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch, but I have a good feeling about this............
And I simply cannot wait to put another piece into the jigsaw puzzle of who Judy-Marie A. Letendre really is.