Fic: Summer of Tomfoolery
Title: Summer of Tomfoolery
Summary: Peter joins the party at the Potters, much to his and Lily’s mutual discomfort. Meanwhile, Sirius does his best to ignore Remus and the strange new tension between them.
Word Count: 2841
dorasolo handles Sirius and Lily, whilst latenightcuppa writes for James and Remus. brownstudies appears as Peter.
Though he is ashamed to admit it, Sirius Black fails at casting Patronus charms. If he could actually cast one, like Lily Evans or James Potter, he'd have sent for Peter Pettigrew to arrive right now and save him from the absolute hell his life has turned into overnight. In addition to Remus smiling at him like he smoked the world's largest joint, now Lily looks at him like he sprouted an elephant's trunk from his arse. He doubts that her concerned looks have anything to do with his discomfort regarding one Benjy Fenwick and his acne-less face and believes they have more to do with the question he started to ask her but never actually asked her before he was distracted. Now, he just wants the subject to drop or for the earth to swallow him whole, so to prevent her from pestering him until he caves like a Hufflepuff stealing cakes, Peter Pettigrew must arrive.
He draws a target on the ground, a very large target, so that Pete has something to aim for on the way down.
James and Remus play chess somewhere to the right of the target, their efforts punctuated by the cries of defeated chess pieces. Lily sits to his left, reading Muggle books that she is afraid she will not have time to read in the coming school year. Sirius wrinkles his nose because this entire scene is the anti-Marauder and he wishes for at least one afternoon of chaos and mayhem that is not in the slightest bit organized.
***
Peter is speeding towards the house at 100 miles per hour, Sirius’s spare crash helmet on and wearing as many cushioning layers of clothing as conceivably possible. Some people, had they had the misfortune to look up into the sky at that point, might have suggested that he’d lost control of the broom; but Peter liked to think that it was just his marauderly daredevil spirit shining through. What young man didn’t enjoy a few triple somersaults at top speed? Admittedly he wasn’t exactly known for ‘flying through the air with the greatest of ease’, but that didn’t mean he was...
...Alright, fuck it, he was out of control.
Turning a sharp left and zooming (freefalling) through the clearing, Peter is glad to see that Sirius had taken his requests literally, and marked his landing spot with a massive red X. It is quite, quite massive. It is ‘Are You Taking The Piss?’ massive, in fact, but the way he’s going it probably isn’t big enough, and oh here we go, point the nose down and take a deep breath.
Peter closes his eyes and tries not to let the increased G Force alarm him too much.
"Shit!" Sirius yells, flails a bit, and backpedals as quickly as possible out of the giant X. He will never tell Peter that he didn't expect the X to actually serve a purpose other than to be a Giant Pain in the Arse, but it seems to be at least guiding Peter to the Potter residence with accuracy that is quite impressive. At Sirius' yell, James, Remus and Lily move to avoid collision, but alas, not all of them avoid it entirely.
Peter opens his eyes briefly, just in time to see his friend's scramble away from the target. A voice in the back of his head is telling him - screaming at him in terror, actually - that it might be a good idea to start pulling up soon if he doesn’t want to end up spiking himself vertically into the target like a metal dart. With some reluctance (he really is right on target) Pete jerks the broom to the right and suddenly finds himself steering a course directly at Lily Evans.
"M- MOVE!!" he shrieks in utter mortification. Careering into a Marauder on landing is pretty commonplace; but Lily Evans?? As if things weren't awkward enough. Why doesn't he just push her face into the mud and call her a silly ginger cow whilst he's at it? He sees her stricken face zooming ever nearer and frantically tugs at the broom to go in another direction, any other direction, just one that doesn't result in his best mate's girlfriend's head being cracked open like a walnut.
"JAMES!" Peter whines, in the hopes of her, or him, or both being saved from endless embarrassment by their mutual staggy hero. But it's too late, he's lost all control of the broom.
Lily has the presence of mind to back away from the hurtling broom, but she is not quite quick enough to manage to do so on her feet. Staggering backwards, she loses her balance and lands, hard. In the interest of not making a big deal about it, she stays down on the ground and stifles the yell of pain that in all other circumstances, would have been mighty. To put it bluntly, Peter Pettigrew makes her nervous. She has never been able to put her finger on why she's wary around him, considering the feelings started long before she stopped denying James his date opportunities. He is the one Marauder that she cannot figure out, and the one Marauder she has had the least contact with over the past six years. The only time she can recall being on the same side is when she finally ditched Severus Snape and they now had a common enemy.
Lily, however, is determined with all of her Gryffindor stubbornness to like him. Or, if she rephrases it properly, determined to make him like her so she can like him back. If she could only figure out how to do that.
Pete looks up from his new vantage point of Lily Evans' shoe. Ow, his brain is telling him. Ow. I don't know if we made it, Petey boy, this looks an awful lot like hell to me. Oh look, a gargoyle.
"Sorry Lily," Peter mutters from under Sirius's helmet. His entire faced now beetroot red, he makes an attempt at eye contact... oh god, no, too embarrassing. He can feel three pairs of Marauder eyes on him as he sits there, broom sticking madly out of the ground and a huge rip in the knee of his jeans. They're probably thinking the same thing as he is: If it wasn't for Lily he'd have been howling for a Medic right about now.
"Lost control a bit," he mumbles shiftily, the understatement of the century. It occurs to him that it might be the done thing to help her up after he's knocked her sideways at 90 miles an hour, so with a bit of hesitation he extends a hand towards her.
She takes it, equally as hesitantly, and with a small smile, she says much too loudly, "S'ok! I am bad on a broom, too!" It's true, and it's a weakness she's not particularly ashamed to admit, though she wonders if the problem was with James as her teacher when the objective was not to fly, but to snog.
Pete winces. He supposes it would be pointless to pretend that this was just a one off, but even he has his pride.
"I lost control a bit," he states again, lamely, and wonders how much longer he's going to be left to avoid making eye contact before somebody else jumps in and saves him. Being in close proximity to Lily has always made him uncomfortable. It isn't because she's a girl - although yes, Peter is pretty useless with them too - it's more than that. Lily Evans is the kind of girl who acts first, asks questions second. She is impulsive, intelligent, and she more than knows how to stand up for herself; her dismissal of Snape has proven that tenfold. In short, she is more of a Marauder than perhaps even he is. In his most paranoid moments, Peter wonders how much longer it would be before James loses himself completely and announces her as the fifth member of their little band, putting the dampener on all their plans because they are too mad, too dangerous, or just plain too silly for the sensible Lily Evans. James is already going around saying and doing bizarre things that he would never have done before Lily Evans agreed to go out with him, like only riding his broom at 50 miles an hour instead of 90 (she worries he’ll get hurt), or not ruffling his hair up every five minutes (she thinks it makes him look like a twat). Pete casts a furtive look over at Prongs. Is he looking.... cleaner than usual?
Lily Evans worries Peter Pettigrew. He might not be able to put his finger on why just yet, but he is certain that no good can come of her and James.
Before the awkward silence can stretch on for any longer, James bounds forward, and snatches the helmet off of Peter's head. "Oh, look, it is Pete underneath that. Bit hard to tell, really, the way it slipped over your eyes. Though the Titanic crash did give you away a bit. Only a Marauder could make such a disaster out of such a simple thing."
James leaps back, popping the helmet over his own head, allowing it to crush his unruly hair and bang into his glasses. He puts one arm around Lily and beams out at them all. "Welcome, Wormtail, to the Potter residence and the Summer of Tomfoolery." Pete smirks in spite of himself.
"Twat," he mumbles fondly. it's been a long summer without his staggy mate to take the piss out of him. Every time he trips up or drops something or careens into a bush, he can almost hear James' jovial heckle: 'Wormtail, you great lumbering arse, watch where you're going!' He gives James a quick punch in the arm, just for good measure.
Remus, finally recovered from his surprise at Peter's somewhat atypical arrival, offers his friend a smile. "Hello, Pete, survived the tourists, then?" With James wrapped up in Lily and Sirius constantly giving him shifty looks, Peter's presence will be a welcome relief. Summer of Tomfoolery, indeed.
At this moment, Sirius decides that if Remus looks at him strangely one more time, he's leaving with Lily at the end of the week and camping out in her record store while she works for the rest of the summer. More Zeppelin, less strange feelings. Not a word has been said about Benjy's lack of acne by anybody other than Lily, and Sirius is positive Remus saw Benjy's remarkably clear face. Sirius has no idea why people are no longer talking to him about seriously trivial matters. Unable to handle any sort of discomfort, however, Sirius believes he must act, and act fast.
"PETEY PETE," he hollers, tackling Peter back to the ground, more to get Pete's attention off of Remus, the smiler, than anything else.
Pete meets the ground with a thunk as Padfoot leaps all over him like a, well, dog. Worried that his friend is about to start licking his face in canine excitement, Peter pushes him off and gives him a punch in the arm too, to match Prongs’. All things being equal and that.
"Hello, daft sod!" he shouts at Pads. Then he remembers something.
"Remus, what is a Pumpion?"
"Padfoot," Remus answers swiftly. Pete hoots and gives Sirius a quick kick in the shin.
"Bloody told you!" he yells. Evans-shaped embarrassment temporarily forgotten, Peter scrambles to his feet and starts to dance circles around Sirius. "I win, Pads!" He's missed this feeling. It is stupid and giddy and immature, and he's missed it. He's missed them, Lily Evans be damned. Somewhere in the middle of his celebratory jig, Padfoot legs him over again and the whole ridiculous cycle starts over. He'll be covered in bruises by the end of the day, if he isn't already.
"Erk, Remus," he chirrups from somewhere underneath Padfoot's armpit. "Alright Moony? I nicked you a load of Earl Grey from the kitchens. Keep you going for weeks, I reckon," he manages to untangle an arm long enough to give Remus the thumbs up.
"What did you bring me??" Sirius barks directly into his ear.
"Fuck all!" giggles Pete, earning himself a particularly ferocious monkey rub.
Lily has wisely decided to back out of the way of the ruckus surrounding Sirius, James, and Peter. As usual, Remus stands at the outskirts of the fray, shaking his head. He is half-happy, half-embarrassed. There is no real reprimand on his lips as he watches his friends tussle on the ground, so he smiles instead at Lily, shrugging lightly. The smile he gives her is a fond "this makes me happy!" smile and Lily struggles to place it for a moment. She smirks back at him, shaking her head slightly. It is his "Sirius Black is right here and doing things!" smile. Perhaps she should warn him that he is more than a bit obvious with his fondness, amongst other things, but she wonders if Sirius even realizes that Remus is different around him than Peter or James.
Whatever Sirius had to say the day before probably died somewhere in the nether regions of his mind, so Lily sighs a bit and resigns herself to never knowing what caused him to act so strangely. She focuses again on the boys on the ground and stifles a very fond grin for James, who is now her very favorite person. She is quite taken by how he can be so mature one second and the next moment, rolling in the dust, a tangle of gangly limbs. She feels a momentary fit of girlishness and vows to write to Alice or Mary soon so that Remus does not have to be at the business end of the too-much-information gun she'd like to fire. In fact, she writes it on the list of things she needs to do before school starts again, including the dreaded "go back to work to make enough money to buy books" that she's been putting off for the past two weeks.
She looks at James, glasses irreparably bent again, dirt undeniably under his shirt and most likely in his pants, and pouts. Leaving is not high on the list of things she'd like to do.
Leaving is quite high on the list of things he would like Lily Evans to do, Peter thinks as he gazes up at her from underneath someone's mud-flecked calf. She's giving them all a look of haughty disdain as they roll about in the dirt, or at least that's how he chooses to interpret it. Rubbing the back of his neck in discomfort, he struggles out of the fray and onto his feet, fixing Remus with a look that he knows will never be returned. He is quite alone in his dislike for Lily Evans. How or why this is, he will never be able to explain, much like he can't completely explain what it is about her that irks him so much. He pulls the other two boys up with their shirt tails, hair, and any other grabbable objects on their person, and the three of them stand in front of Remus and Lily, mischievous smirks playing about their faces. There is dirt in places no loofah should venture, which is as it should be, Pete thinks.
"MY LADY LOVE," yells James, throwing his arms around Lily, "you are much, much too clean!"
"Yes," agrees Sirius, picking up a handful of dirt and dropping it into her hair, careful to avoid Remus at all costs (and besides, Remus should be clean, because Remus is always clean). "You are now dirtier than ever, Evans, what have you to say?"
"Thanks," she says dryly, and chucks a handful of ice cubes from an errant glass at him.
Sirius nods at James, and James back at Sirius, speaking in the language only they understand. Remus rolls his eyes. "Go inside, Lily. The next step in this ritual... It involves, well, I'll spare you the details."
Not quite sure if Remus is kidding, Lily yelps and runs for the house, calling dibs on first shower.
James looks expectantly at Peter. Sirius looks expectantly at Peter. Remus looks, first fondly at Sirius, then expectantly at Peter. Peter looks from James, to the retreating back of Lily, then back at James again, then at Sirius, then questioningly at Remus, who for some reason is looking at Sirius with a weird sappy smile, then finally gives up on trying to figure them all out and follows Lily up the garden.
"Prongs, make her let me shower first," he whines, wandering off up the path and completely missing the part where he's supposed to say, 'Oh James, your girlfriend is lovely!' Which is good, Peter would have thought, had he been aware, because she isn't.
Summary: Peter joins the party at the Potters, much to his and Lily’s mutual discomfort. Meanwhile, Sirius does his best to ignore Remus and the strange new tension between them.
Word Count: 2841
dorasolo handles Sirius and Lily, whilst latenightcuppa writes for James and Remus. brownstudies appears as Peter.
Though he is ashamed to admit it, Sirius Black fails at casting Patronus charms. If he could actually cast one, like Lily Evans or James Potter, he'd have sent for Peter Pettigrew to arrive right now and save him from the absolute hell his life has turned into overnight. In addition to Remus smiling at him like he smoked the world's largest joint, now Lily looks at him like he sprouted an elephant's trunk from his arse. He doubts that her concerned looks have anything to do with his discomfort regarding one Benjy Fenwick and his acne-less face and believes they have more to do with the question he started to ask her but never actually asked her before he was distracted. Now, he just wants the subject to drop or for the earth to swallow him whole, so to prevent her from pestering him until he caves like a Hufflepuff stealing cakes, Peter Pettigrew must arrive.
He draws a target on the ground, a very large target, so that Pete has something to aim for on the way down.
James and Remus play chess somewhere to the right of the target, their efforts punctuated by the cries of defeated chess pieces. Lily sits to his left, reading Muggle books that she is afraid she will not have time to read in the coming school year. Sirius wrinkles his nose because this entire scene is the anti-Marauder and he wishes for at least one afternoon of chaos and mayhem that is not in the slightest bit organized.
***
Peter is speeding towards the house at 100 miles per hour, Sirius’s spare crash helmet on and wearing as many cushioning layers of clothing as conceivably possible. Some people, had they had the misfortune to look up into the sky at that point, might have suggested that he’d lost control of the broom; but Peter liked to think that it was just his marauderly daredevil spirit shining through. What young man didn’t enjoy a few triple somersaults at top speed? Admittedly he wasn’t exactly known for ‘flying through the air with the greatest of ease’, but that didn’t mean he was...
...Alright, fuck it, he was out of control.
Turning a sharp left and zooming (freefalling) through the clearing, Peter is glad to see that Sirius had taken his requests literally, and marked his landing spot with a massive red X. It is quite, quite massive. It is ‘Are You Taking The Piss?’ massive, in fact, but the way he’s going it probably isn’t big enough, and oh here we go, point the nose down and take a deep breath.
Peter closes his eyes and tries not to let the increased G Force alarm him too much.
"Shit!" Sirius yells, flails a bit, and backpedals as quickly as possible out of the giant X. He will never tell Peter that he didn't expect the X to actually serve a purpose other than to be a Giant Pain in the Arse, but it seems to be at least guiding Peter to the Potter residence with accuracy that is quite impressive. At Sirius' yell, James, Remus and Lily move to avoid collision, but alas, not all of them avoid it entirely.
Peter opens his eyes briefly, just in time to see his friend's scramble away from the target. A voice in the back of his head is telling him - screaming at him in terror, actually - that it might be a good idea to start pulling up soon if he doesn’t want to end up spiking himself vertically into the target like a metal dart. With some reluctance (he really is right on target) Pete jerks the broom to the right and suddenly finds himself steering a course directly at Lily Evans.
"M- MOVE!!" he shrieks in utter mortification. Careering into a Marauder on landing is pretty commonplace; but Lily Evans?? As if things weren't awkward enough. Why doesn't he just push her face into the mud and call her a silly ginger cow whilst he's at it? He sees her stricken face zooming ever nearer and frantically tugs at the broom to go in another direction, any other direction, just one that doesn't result in his best mate's girlfriend's head being cracked open like a walnut.
"JAMES!" Peter whines, in the hopes of her, or him, or both being saved from endless embarrassment by their mutual staggy hero. But it's too late, he's lost all control of the broom.
Lily has the presence of mind to back away from the hurtling broom, but she is not quite quick enough to manage to do so on her feet. Staggering backwards, she loses her balance and lands, hard. In the interest of not making a big deal about it, she stays down on the ground and stifles the yell of pain that in all other circumstances, would have been mighty. To put it bluntly, Peter Pettigrew makes her nervous. She has never been able to put her finger on why she's wary around him, considering the feelings started long before she stopped denying James his date opportunities. He is the one Marauder that she cannot figure out, and the one Marauder she has had the least contact with over the past six years. The only time she can recall being on the same side is when she finally ditched Severus Snape and they now had a common enemy.
Lily, however, is determined with all of her Gryffindor stubbornness to like him. Or, if she rephrases it properly, determined to make him like her so she can like him back. If she could only figure out how to do that.
Pete looks up from his new vantage point of Lily Evans' shoe. Ow, his brain is telling him. Ow. I don't know if we made it, Petey boy, this looks an awful lot like hell to me. Oh look, a gargoyle.
"Sorry Lily," Peter mutters from under Sirius's helmet. His entire faced now beetroot red, he makes an attempt at eye contact... oh god, no, too embarrassing. He can feel three pairs of Marauder eyes on him as he sits there, broom sticking madly out of the ground and a huge rip in the knee of his jeans. They're probably thinking the same thing as he is: If it wasn't for Lily he'd have been howling for a Medic right about now.
"Lost control a bit," he mumbles shiftily, the understatement of the century. It occurs to him that it might be the done thing to help her up after he's knocked her sideways at 90 miles an hour, so with a bit of hesitation he extends a hand towards her.
She takes it, equally as hesitantly, and with a small smile, she says much too loudly, "S'ok! I am bad on a broom, too!" It's true, and it's a weakness she's not particularly ashamed to admit, though she wonders if the problem was with James as her teacher when the objective was not to fly, but to snog.
Pete winces. He supposes it would be pointless to pretend that this was just a one off, but even he has his pride.
"I lost control a bit," he states again, lamely, and wonders how much longer he's going to be left to avoid making eye contact before somebody else jumps in and saves him. Being in close proximity to Lily has always made him uncomfortable. It isn't because she's a girl - although yes, Peter is pretty useless with them too - it's more than that. Lily Evans is the kind of girl who acts first, asks questions second. She is impulsive, intelligent, and she more than knows how to stand up for herself; her dismissal of Snape has proven that tenfold. In short, she is more of a Marauder than perhaps even he is. In his most paranoid moments, Peter wonders how much longer it would be before James loses himself completely and announces her as the fifth member of their little band, putting the dampener on all their plans because they are too mad, too dangerous, or just plain too silly for the sensible Lily Evans. James is already going around saying and doing bizarre things that he would never have done before Lily Evans agreed to go out with him, like only riding his broom at 50 miles an hour instead of 90 (she worries he’ll get hurt), or not ruffling his hair up every five minutes (she thinks it makes him look like a twat). Pete casts a furtive look over at Prongs. Is he looking.... cleaner than usual?
Lily Evans worries Peter Pettigrew. He might not be able to put his finger on why just yet, but he is certain that no good can come of her and James.
Before the awkward silence can stretch on for any longer, James bounds forward, and snatches the helmet off of Peter's head. "Oh, look, it is Pete underneath that. Bit hard to tell, really, the way it slipped over your eyes. Though the Titanic crash did give you away a bit. Only a Marauder could make such a disaster out of such a simple thing."
James leaps back, popping the helmet over his own head, allowing it to crush his unruly hair and bang into his glasses. He puts one arm around Lily and beams out at them all. "Welcome, Wormtail, to the Potter residence and the Summer of Tomfoolery." Pete smirks in spite of himself.
"Twat," he mumbles fondly. it's been a long summer without his staggy mate to take the piss out of him. Every time he trips up or drops something or careens into a bush, he can almost hear James' jovial heckle: 'Wormtail, you great lumbering arse, watch where you're going!' He gives James a quick punch in the arm, just for good measure.
Remus, finally recovered from his surprise at Peter's somewhat atypical arrival, offers his friend a smile. "Hello, Pete, survived the tourists, then?" With James wrapped up in Lily and Sirius constantly giving him shifty looks, Peter's presence will be a welcome relief. Summer of Tomfoolery, indeed.
At this moment, Sirius decides that if Remus looks at him strangely one more time, he's leaving with Lily at the end of the week and camping out in her record store while she works for the rest of the summer. More Zeppelin, less strange feelings. Not a word has been said about Benjy's lack of acne by anybody other than Lily, and Sirius is positive Remus saw Benjy's remarkably clear face. Sirius has no idea why people are no longer talking to him about seriously trivial matters. Unable to handle any sort of discomfort, however, Sirius believes he must act, and act fast.
"PETEY PETE," he hollers, tackling Peter back to the ground, more to get Pete's attention off of Remus, the smiler, than anything else.
Pete meets the ground with a thunk as Padfoot leaps all over him like a, well, dog. Worried that his friend is about to start licking his face in canine excitement, Peter pushes him off and gives him a punch in the arm too, to match Prongs’. All things being equal and that.
"Hello, daft sod!" he shouts at Pads. Then he remembers something.
"Remus, what is a Pumpion?"
"Padfoot," Remus answers swiftly. Pete hoots and gives Sirius a quick kick in the shin.
"Bloody told you!" he yells. Evans-shaped embarrassment temporarily forgotten, Peter scrambles to his feet and starts to dance circles around Sirius. "I win, Pads!" He's missed this feeling. It is stupid and giddy and immature, and he's missed it. He's missed them, Lily Evans be damned. Somewhere in the middle of his celebratory jig, Padfoot legs him over again and the whole ridiculous cycle starts over. He'll be covered in bruises by the end of the day, if he isn't already.
"Erk, Remus," he chirrups from somewhere underneath Padfoot's armpit. "Alright Moony? I nicked you a load of Earl Grey from the kitchens. Keep you going for weeks, I reckon," he manages to untangle an arm long enough to give Remus the thumbs up.
"What did you bring me??" Sirius barks directly into his ear.
"Fuck all!" giggles Pete, earning himself a particularly ferocious monkey rub.
Lily has wisely decided to back out of the way of the ruckus surrounding Sirius, James, and Peter. As usual, Remus stands at the outskirts of the fray, shaking his head. He is half-happy, half-embarrassed. There is no real reprimand on his lips as he watches his friends tussle on the ground, so he smiles instead at Lily, shrugging lightly. The smile he gives her is a fond "this makes me happy!" smile and Lily struggles to place it for a moment. She smirks back at him, shaking her head slightly. It is his "Sirius Black is right here and doing things!" smile. Perhaps she should warn him that he is more than a bit obvious with his fondness, amongst other things, but she wonders if Sirius even realizes that Remus is different around him than Peter or James.
Whatever Sirius had to say the day before probably died somewhere in the nether regions of his mind, so Lily sighs a bit and resigns herself to never knowing what caused him to act so strangely. She focuses again on the boys on the ground and stifles a very fond grin for James, who is now her very favorite person. She is quite taken by how he can be so mature one second and the next moment, rolling in the dust, a tangle of gangly limbs. She feels a momentary fit of girlishness and vows to write to Alice or Mary soon so that Remus does not have to be at the business end of the too-much-information gun she'd like to fire. In fact, she writes it on the list of things she needs to do before school starts again, including the dreaded "go back to work to make enough money to buy books" that she's been putting off for the past two weeks.
She looks at James, glasses irreparably bent again, dirt undeniably under his shirt and most likely in his pants, and pouts. Leaving is not high on the list of things she'd like to do.
Leaving is quite high on the list of things he would like Lily Evans to do, Peter thinks as he gazes up at her from underneath someone's mud-flecked calf. She's giving them all a look of haughty disdain as they roll about in the dirt, or at least that's how he chooses to interpret it. Rubbing the back of his neck in discomfort, he struggles out of the fray and onto his feet, fixing Remus with a look that he knows will never be returned. He is quite alone in his dislike for Lily Evans. How or why this is, he will never be able to explain, much like he can't completely explain what it is about her that irks him so much. He pulls the other two boys up with their shirt tails, hair, and any other grabbable objects on their person, and the three of them stand in front of Remus and Lily, mischievous smirks playing about their faces. There is dirt in places no loofah should venture, which is as it should be, Pete thinks.
"MY LADY LOVE," yells James, throwing his arms around Lily, "you are much, much too clean!"
"Yes," agrees Sirius, picking up a handful of dirt and dropping it into her hair, careful to avoid Remus at all costs (and besides, Remus should be clean, because Remus is always clean). "You are now dirtier than ever, Evans, what have you to say?"
"Thanks," she says dryly, and chucks a handful of ice cubes from an errant glass at him.
Sirius nods at James, and James back at Sirius, speaking in the language only they understand. Remus rolls his eyes. "Go inside, Lily. The next step in this ritual... It involves, well, I'll spare you the details."
Not quite sure if Remus is kidding, Lily yelps and runs for the house, calling dibs on first shower.
James looks expectantly at Peter. Sirius looks expectantly at Peter. Remus looks, first fondly at Sirius, then expectantly at Peter. Peter looks from James, to the retreating back of Lily, then back at James again, then at Sirius, then questioningly at Remus, who for some reason is looking at Sirius with a weird sappy smile, then finally gives up on trying to figure them all out and follows Lily up the garden.
"Prongs, make her let me shower first," he whines, wandering off up the path and completely missing the part where he's supposed to say, 'Oh James, your girlfriend is lovely!' Which is good, Peter would have thought, had he been aware, because she isn't.