(no subject)
A few minor points!
1. Being extremely poor again is awesome. I'm losing all that weight that made me have low body confidence. No, I'm serious. Being too poor to feed myself more than ramen noodles is awesome.
Really. It's awesome.
Shut up.
2. By the time I can afford to have all my stuff sent to me from out west, I'll probably be done school and be moving back west for work. And on this note of "my stuff"... my friend Jeff, who is holding onto all my stuff for me, cannot afford to send me another box of my stuff, because oh shit, he's so in debt, he needs all the money he's got. Yet, he could buy himself a brand-new Wii on Sunday.
I dunno. I've been in monster debt before (still am!), and I didn't go buy myself a fucking new game console. I quite sat there and tried to pay my goddamn debts off before being selfish like that.
But that's just me, I guess.
3. Sometimes, I regret moving back out here. Life was dull out west, but at least I was making money and able to feed myself. At least I had my cat. I had friends who I saw regularly and hung out with. I had new clothes. I had my books, my games, all the stuff I needed to take my mind off the fact that, ultimately, I wasn't happy there, either. But at least I could do that. Here, I have no actual bedroom, no dvds to watch, no games to play, no books to read, and no Jakey-cat.
I know I'm like, investing in my future by doing the school thing, but right now, I just want to be able to go out to the bar on a Friday night, have a few beer, and grab a burger on my way home from school. That's not a lot to ask, y'know? I hate being the impoverished kid everywhere I go. It's frustrating and people seem to flaunt their wealth without knowing it, which drives me bonkers.
It sounds stupid, but when people go "Oh man, I'm hungry. I haven't eaten since this morning." and think that's hunger, it makes me mad. Hunger is when you're so hungry, you stop noticing it. Hunger is when you're watching someone not finish everything they're eating, and it makes you want to go over and smack them and scream "Why aren't you eating that? That's good food! Eat it!"
I wish I could find work. Even if it pushes my time to the limit between school and work, I don't care. I'm so sick of being poor, hungry, and of wearing the same pair of pants and seven shirts every week. I, at this moment, require a new bus pass for December and a winter coat. That's over a hundred dollars. The amount of money I currently have? $0. I'll also need to pay my phone bill at some point, lest it be disconnected again.
Ah, Christ. It hurts.
1. Being extremely poor again is awesome. I'm losing all that weight that made me have low body confidence. No, I'm serious. Being too poor to feed myself more than ramen noodles is awesome.
Really. It's awesome.
Shut up.
2. By the time I can afford to have all my stuff sent to me from out west, I'll probably be done school and be moving back west for work. And on this note of "my stuff"... my friend Jeff, who is holding onto all my stuff for me, cannot afford to send me another box of my stuff, because oh shit, he's so in debt, he needs all the money he's got. Yet, he could buy himself a brand-new Wii on Sunday.
I dunno. I've been in monster debt before (still am!), and I didn't go buy myself a fucking new game console. I quite sat there and tried to pay my goddamn debts off before being selfish like that.
But that's just me, I guess.
3. Sometimes, I regret moving back out here. Life was dull out west, but at least I was making money and able to feed myself. At least I had my cat. I had friends who I saw regularly and hung out with. I had new clothes. I had my books, my games, all the stuff I needed to take my mind off the fact that, ultimately, I wasn't happy there, either. But at least I could do that. Here, I have no actual bedroom, no dvds to watch, no games to play, no books to read, and no Jakey-cat.
I know I'm like, investing in my future by doing the school thing, but right now, I just want to be able to go out to the bar on a Friday night, have a few beer, and grab a burger on my way home from school. That's not a lot to ask, y'know? I hate being the impoverished kid everywhere I go. It's frustrating and people seem to flaunt their wealth without knowing it, which drives me bonkers.
It sounds stupid, but when people go "Oh man, I'm hungry. I haven't eaten since this morning." and think that's hunger, it makes me mad. Hunger is when you're so hungry, you stop noticing it. Hunger is when you're watching someone not finish everything they're eating, and it makes you want to go over and smack them and scream "Why aren't you eating that? That's good food! Eat it!"
I wish I could find work. Even if it pushes my time to the limit between school and work, I don't care. I'm so sick of being poor, hungry, and of wearing the same pair of pants and seven shirts every week. I, at this moment, require a new bus pass for December and a winter coat. That's over a hundred dollars. The amount of money I currently have? $0. I'll also need to pay my phone bill at some point, lest it be disconnected again.
Ah, Christ. It hurts.