I'm Back, Baby
I'm creeping back into this with hesitation but willing to give it a go again, since so much has changed (and so much has remained the same) in my little world on this planet, recent events renewing my interest in fast-thought journal writing online. I stopped writing for a really long time. Or, a really long time for me, anyway. A month or so ago I picked it up again, writing by hand in my paper journal, thinking I wouldn't be able to put anything into words but ending up filling pages and pages of thoughts and drawings and glue-ins. I feel like I've forgotten how to put together my thoughts in a coherent way, I'm out of practice and it shows. My hand won't move fast enough for my brain so now I'm back here on LJ spewing out any and every dumb idea that comes to my head.
I'm not sure anyone even reads this anymore, which might be for the best anyhow. I can't even believe my password still works, that any of this is still here. Seven years of Nora's psycho-babble. Welcome home.
I have to admit, this re-entry into the internet's orbit was prompted by a friend slash "ex-boyfriend" finding it when he was googling my email address and telling me he wish he didn't even get involved with me because of the things he read. I couldn't believe it, so I ventured back into time and totally fell in love with myself though I was expecting to be horrified. I couldn't remember what all I had written until I started prying again. It all came back to me, the absurdity and relevance of it all. I still don't get what was so awful in here that spurred on his hatred for me, but whatever. I can't get hung up on what other people think of me anymore. It's just not worth it.
So now I'm home again after a long stay-away from my own madness. Maybe this is where I'll find myself between customers when I'm working at the coffee shop. THE coffee shop. My mind is a mess lately, I need to comb it through with practice. None of this may make any sense. But then again, nothing has since I fell down the rabbit hole and moved to GUERNEVILLE.
In a nutshell, my life has become a blend of Northern Exposure and the Village People, on acid. The boy drama never stopped, in fact it got worse. A few fallings-out with Em and back again. My mom moved up here and Sam went to India. My father is still living his dream life. I'm single and unavailable and can't wait to make 2013 the best freakin' year of my life. Setting the ground work for the next 5 years AS OF NOW. I used to think I couldn't handle this world. Now I'm sure it can't handle me.
Just another freak in the freak kingdom.... out and out until next time for a real entry.
I'm not sure anyone even reads this anymore, which might be for the best anyhow. I can't even believe my password still works, that any of this is still here. Seven years of Nora's psycho-babble. Welcome home.
I have to admit, this re-entry into the internet's orbit was prompted by a friend slash "ex-boyfriend" finding it when he was googling my email address and telling me he wish he didn't even get involved with me because of the things he read. I couldn't believe it, so I ventured back into time and totally fell in love with myself though I was expecting to be horrified. I couldn't remember what all I had written until I started prying again. It all came back to me, the absurdity and relevance of it all. I still don't get what was so awful in here that spurred on his hatred for me, but whatever. I can't get hung up on what other people think of me anymore. It's just not worth it.
So now I'm home again after a long stay-away from my own madness. Maybe this is where I'll find myself between customers when I'm working at the coffee shop. THE coffee shop. My mind is a mess lately, I need to comb it through with practice. None of this may make any sense. But then again, nothing has since I fell down the rabbit hole and moved to GUERNEVILLE.
In a nutshell, my life has become a blend of Northern Exposure and the Village People, on acid. The boy drama never stopped, in fact it got worse. A few fallings-out with Em and back again. My mom moved up here and Sam went to India. My father is still living his dream life. I'm single and unavailable and can't wait to make 2013 the best freakin' year of my life. Setting the ground work for the next 5 years AS OF NOW. I used to think I couldn't handle this world. Now I'm sure it can't handle me.
Just another freak in the freak kingdom.... out and out until next time for a real entry.