#172 - If you could pick anyone in the world, alive or dead, to be your parents...
Sometimes, Rev dreams about her mother. Not her Mom, the woman who raised her, but her birth mother. She can’t ever remember much about those dreams, except that the woman always seems to be crying and Rev doesn’t know why. Is it because of her? Is it because she had to give Rev up? Or is it because the curse was evident even when she was a baby, her curse of beauty, and her mother knew there was no way she could keep her. Keep her safe.
Sometimes, Rev wonders if it’s not really a dream, but a memory. How old was she when she was adopted? Two? Three? Could she even have memories from being that young? She’s heard people say they remember things from when they were babies, but Rev isn’t sure she believes it. Probably just things they want to remember, heard about from someone else, and created a memory for it.
Sometimes, Rev thinks that’s what she’s done, too. Created a memory of a mother who loved her, but couldn’t keep her because she was too beautiful, too precious, too perfect that her mother knew she had to give Rev up to people who deserved her. A mother who was wrong.
Sometimes, Rev wishes she could go back in time, go back to the very moment her mother made that decision and somehow, convince her that it was going to be all right. She could keep Rev and everything would be okay because they would have each other.
But mostly, she just wants to stop her mother from crying. And that’s why Rev will never find her.
Sometimes, Rev wonders if it’s not really a dream, but a memory. How old was she when she was adopted? Two? Three? Could she even have memories from being that young? She’s heard people say they remember things from when they were babies, but Rev isn’t sure she believes it. Probably just things they want to remember, heard about from someone else, and created a memory for it.
Sometimes, Rev thinks that’s what she’s done, too. Created a memory of a mother who loved her, but couldn’t keep her because she was too beautiful, too precious, too perfect that her mother knew she had to give Rev up to people who deserved her. A mother who was wrong.
Sometimes, Rev wishes she could go back in time, go back to the very moment her mother made that decision and somehow, convince her that it was going to be all right. She could keep Rev and everything would be okay because they would have each other.
But mostly, she just wants to stop her mother from crying. And that’s why Rev will never find her.