on being flexible
I always thought, and even said aloud, "I'm not flexible. In fact, I'm rigid and uncompromising."
Last winter, when Zor moved out temporarily, I realized it's not me. It's life.
With slack in my schedule I suddenly became all about flexiblility, spontanaeity, go with the flow.
Now, not so much again. It's not her fault. Again, it's life. When there is too much to do, there are no empty slots on the schedule. Making any change is like one of those slider puzzles. Remember these?
To move one "thing", you have to move every "thing", and it fast becomes overwhelming. Also in real life, many "things" you might want to move affect other people, such as the dogs' need to use the yard more than once a day, and some "things" can't be moved at all, such as class start times. Sure I could skip class for whatever, but I paid for it and I don't want to.
That's where legit inflexibility comes in. I don't want to miss things I paid for, piss off my doctor by missing appointments, skip classes I paid for, do without sleep. I don't want to, and ain't gonna, just because someone is going to be all, "You're too inflexible."
Yeah, I am. Not by choice, but I am. And that state of affairs will ease some when Zor is out on her own, but I will be in zero big hurry to slot in a bunch of new responsibilities! Or to sluff off the ones I'll still have, either.
I might, however, occasionally be able to slot in an extra cup of coffee with a friend or a photo trip to the duck park or a cemetery walk or even a date night with the old man.
We live in hope.
Last winter, when Zor moved out temporarily, I realized it's not me. It's life.
With slack in my schedule I suddenly became all about flexiblility, spontanaeity, go with the flow.
Now, not so much again. It's not her fault. Again, it's life. When there is too much to do, there are no empty slots on the schedule. Making any change is like one of those slider puzzles. Remember these?
To move one "thing", you have to move every "thing", and it fast becomes overwhelming. Also in real life, many "things" you might want to move affect other people, such as the dogs' need to use the yard more than once a day, and some "things" can't be moved at all, such as class start times. Sure I could skip class for whatever, but I paid for it and I don't want to.
That's where legit inflexibility comes in. I don't want to miss things I paid for, piss off my doctor by missing appointments, skip classes I paid for, do without sleep. I don't want to, and ain't gonna, just because someone is going to be all, "You're too inflexible."
Yeah, I am. Not by choice, but I am. And that state of affairs will ease some when Zor is out on her own, but I will be in zero big hurry to slot in a bunch of new responsibilities! Or to sluff off the ones I'll still have, either.
I might, however, occasionally be able to slot in an extra cup of coffee with a friend or a photo trip to the duck park or a cemetery walk or even a date night with the old man.
We live in hope.