Fun with Quote Generators!
"When a thing has been said and well, have no scruple. Take it and copy it."
-- Anatole France
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."
-- Benjamin Franklin, 1759
"Never judge a book by its movie."
-- J.W. Eagan
"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition."
-- Timothy Leary
"To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead."
-Bertrand Russell
"Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more."
-- Mark Twain
Catch a fly. Put it in the freezer compartment of your refrigerator for 5 to 10 minutes. This slows him down considerably, so he's easier to handle. While he's in there, make a miniature paper airplane with a wing-span about double that of the fly. Take the cool dude out of the ice-box and super glue his tiny feet onto the upper surface of the paper airplane. As he warms up and revives, he will begin doing that most natural of all fly activities: he will try to fly. If you have not made your little airplane too heavy, the fly's wing beats will be adequate for lift off. However, carrying the added weight quickly tires the fly, so in mid-air, he will stop beating his wings, and the airplane will soar downward. Seeing his plight causes the fly to once again attempt to fly, with the same result. Little bursts of energy as the plane gains altitude, alternated with slow downward glides. A thread super glued to the plane will keep your aerial circus in the same room, or you can take your new pet fly out for a walk, er, fly.
--Gary Benson
"I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top."
--English professor grading a student's paper. Ohio University
It seems when Apollo Mission Astronaut, Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous "One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for mankind" statement, but followed it by several remarks - usual com traffic between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control. Before he reentered the lander, he made the enigmatic remark "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky."
Many people at NASA though it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut, however, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian nor American space programs. Over the years many people have questioned him as to what the "Good luck, Mr Gorsky" statement meant. A few months ago, (July 5, 1995, Tampa Bay, Florida) while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year old question to Mr. Armstrong. He finally responded. It seems that Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.
When he was a kid, he was playing baseball with his brother in the backyard. His brother hit a fly ball which landed in front of his neighbors bedroom window. His neighbors were Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick it up, he heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky. "Oral sex, oral sex you want? You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"
--1995 article in some magazine
"Suppose you were an imbecile and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."
--Mark Twain
"You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans."
-- Ronald Reagan
"Marijuana will be legal some day, because the many law students who now smoke pot will some day become congressmen and legalize it in order to protect themselves."
-- Lenny Bruce
"My candle burns at both ends;
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends --
It gives a lovely light!"
-- Edna St. Vincent Millay
"It will be generally found that those who sneer habitually at human nature and affect to despise it, are among its worst and least pleasant examples."
-- Charles Dickens
"The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?"
-- David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.
"Do you cry that you find no answers? By what means did you hope to find them? You reject your tool of perception -- your mind -- then complain that the universe is a mystery. You discard your key, then wail that all doors are locked against you. You start out in pursuit of the irrational, then damn existence as making no sense."
-- John Galt, in Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged
"Back of the beating hammer by which the steel is wrought,
Back of the workshop's clamor the seeker may find the thought;
The thought that is ever Master of iron and steam and steel,
That rises above disaster and tramples it under heel.
The drudge may fret and tinker or labor with lusty blows,
But back of him stands the Thinker, the clear-eyed man who knows;
For into each plow or saber, each piece and part and whole,
Must go the brains of labor, which gives the work a soul.
Back of the motors humming, back of the bells that ring,
Back of the hammers drumming, back of the cranes that swing,
There is the eye which scans them, watching through stress and strain
There is the Mind which plans them -- back of the brawn the Brain.
Light of the roaring boiler, force of the engine's thrust,
Strength of the sweating toiler, greatly in these we trust;
But back of them stands the schemer, the Thinker who drives things through,
Back of the job the Dreamer who's making the dream come true."
-- Berton Braley, "Songs of a Workaday World"
"In three words I can sum up everything I learned about life. It goes on."
-- Robert Frost
"Sometimes it is said that man cannot be trusted with the government of himself. Can he, then, be trusted with the government of others?"
-- Thomas Jefferson, 1801
"There is always some madness in love, but there is also always some reason in madness."
-- Friedrich Nietzsche
He [Jefferson] was less alarmed by Shays's rebellion than many of his countrymen. Madison saw the turbulent scenes in Massachusetts as portending a crisis in civil governnment and feared the Confederation was "tottering to its foundation." Jefferson, on the other hand, wrote: "God forbid we should ever be 20 years without such a rebellion... What country can preserve its liberties if their rulers are not warned from time to time that their people preserve the spirit of resistance? ... The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants."
--"In Pursuit of Reason: The Life of Thomas Jefferson" by Noble Cunnigham Jr
"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."
-- Mark Twain
"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"
-- H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.
"A government big enough to give us everything we want would be big enough to take from us everything we have."
-- Gerald Ford
"If the opposite of PRO is CON, then what is the opposite of PROGRESS?"
-- Unknown
"Love is the difficult realization that something other than oneself is real."
-- Iris Murdoch
"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."
-- Albert Einstein
"A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort."
-- Herm Albright
"Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another."
-- H. L. Mencken
"For most of history, Anonymous was a woman."
-- Virginia Woolf
"Where a calculator on the ENIAC is equipped with 18,000 vacuum tubes and weighs 30 tons, computers in the future may have only 1,000 vacuum tubes and perhaps weigh 1.5 tons."
-- Unknown; Popular Mechanics, 1949
"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from a religious conviction."
-- Blaise Pascal (1623 - 1662)
"To 'err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer."
-- Farmers' Almanac
"What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans, and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy?"
-- Mahatma Gandhi
"Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before."
-- Mae West
"Every sweet has its sour; every evil its good."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Love is not enough. It must be the foundation, the cornerstone - but not the complete structure. It is much too pliable, too yeilding."
-- Bette Davis
"But when a young lady is to be heroine, the perverseness of forty surounding families cannot prevent her. Something must and will happen to throw a hero in her way."
-- Jane Austen
"Woe be to him who reads but one book."
-- George Herbert (1593 - 1633)
"The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Be careful about reading health books: you may die of a misprint."
-- Mark Twain
"Where you find the laws most numerous, there you will find also the greatest injustice."
-- Arcesilaus
"A room without books is like a body without a soul."
-- G. K. Chesterton
"The key is to commit crimes so confusing that the police feel too stupid to even write a crime report about them."
-- Randy K. Milholland
"Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love."
-- Charles M. Schulz
"Those that can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities."
-- Voltaire
"The world is our stage, but the play is badly cast."
-- Oscar Wilde
"I opened up a yogurt, underneath the lid it said, "Please Try Again" They were having a contest I was unaware of. But, I thought I might have opened the yogurt wrong, or maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me. 'C'mon, Mitch, don't give up. Please try again. A message of inspiration from your friends at Yoplait. Fruit on the bottom, hope on top.'"
-- Mitch Hedberg
"Internet is so big, so powerful, and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life."
-- Andrew Brown
"There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly."
-- Buckminster Fuller
"There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past."
-- George Carlin
"I detest what you write, but I would give my life to make it possible for you to continue to write."
-- Voltaire
-- Anatole France
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."
-- Benjamin Franklin, 1759
"Never judge a book by its movie."
-- J.W. Eagan
"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition."
-- Timothy Leary
"To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead."
-Bertrand Russell
"Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more."
-- Mark Twain
Catch a fly. Put it in the freezer compartment of your refrigerator for 5 to 10 minutes. This slows him down considerably, so he's easier to handle. While he's in there, make a miniature paper airplane with a wing-span about double that of the fly. Take the cool dude out of the ice-box and super glue his tiny feet onto the upper surface of the paper airplane. As he warms up and revives, he will begin doing that most natural of all fly activities: he will try to fly. If you have not made your little airplane too heavy, the fly's wing beats will be adequate for lift off. However, carrying the added weight quickly tires the fly, so in mid-air, he will stop beating his wings, and the airplane will soar downward. Seeing his plight causes the fly to once again attempt to fly, with the same result. Little bursts of energy as the plane gains altitude, alternated with slow downward glides. A thread super glued to the plane will keep your aerial circus in the same room, or you can take your new pet fly out for a walk, er, fly.
--Gary Benson
"I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top."
--English professor grading a student's paper. Ohio University
It seems when Apollo Mission Astronaut, Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous "One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for mankind" statement, but followed it by several remarks - usual com traffic between him, the other astronauts and Mission Control. Before he reentered the lander, he made the enigmatic remark "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky."
Many people at NASA though it was a casual remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut, however, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian nor American space programs. Over the years many people have questioned him as to what the "Good luck, Mr Gorsky" statement meant. A few months ago, (July 5, 1995, Tampa Bay, Florida) while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26 year old question to Mr. Armstrong. He finally responded. It seems that Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.
When he was a kid, he was playing baseball with his brother in the backyard. His brother hit a fly ball which landed in front of his neighbors bedroom window. His neighbors were Mr. and Mrs. Gorsky. As he leaned down to pick it up, he heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky. "Oral sex, oral sex you want? You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"
--1995 article in some magazine
"Suppose you were an imbecile and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."
--Mark Twain
"You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans."
-- Ronald Reagan
"Marijuana will be legal some day, because the many law students who now smoke pot will some day become congressmen and legalize it in order to protect themselves."
-- Lenny Bruce
"My candle burns at both ends;
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends --
It gives a lovely light!"
-- Edna St. Vincent Millay
"It will be generally found that those who sneer habitually at human nature and affect to despise it, are among its worst and least pleasant examples."
-- Charles Dickens
"The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?"
-- David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.
"Do you cry that you find no answers? By what means did you hope to find them? You reject your tool of perception -- your mind -- then complain that the universe is a mystery. You discard your key, then wail that all doors are locked against you. You start out in pursuit of the irrational, then damn existence as making no sense."
-- John Galt, in Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged
"Back of the beating hammer by which the steel is wrought,
Back of the workshop's clamor the seeker may find the thought;
The thought that is ever Master of iron and steam and steel,
That rises above disaster and tramples it under heel.
The drudge may fret and tinker or labor with lusty blows,
But back of him stands the Thinker, the clear-eyed man who knows;
For into each plow or saber, each piece and part and whole,
Must go the brains of labor, which gives the work a soul.
Back of the motors humming, back of the bells that ring,
Back of the hammers drumming, back of the cranes that swing,
There is the eye which scans them, watching through stress and strain
There is the Mind which plans them -- back of the brawn the Brain.
Light of the roaring boiler, force of the engine's thrust,
Strength of the sweating toiler, greatly in these we trust;
But back of them stands the schemer, the Thinker who drives things through,
Back of the job the Dreamer who's making the dream come true."
-- Berton Braley, "Songs of a Workaday World"
"In three words I can sum up everything I learned about life. It goes on."
-- Robert Frost
"Sometimes it is said that man cannot be trusted with the government of himself. Can he, then, be trusted with the government of others?"
-- Thomas Jefferson, 1801
"There is always some madness in love, but there is also always some reason in madness."
-- Friedrich Nietzsche
He [Jefferson] was less alarmed by Shays's rebellion than many of his countrymen. Madison saw the turbulent scenes in Massachusetts as portending a crisis in civil governnment and feared the Confederation was "tottering to its foundation." Jefferson, on the other hand, wrote: "God forbid we should ever be 20 years without such a rebellion... What country can preserve its liberties if their rulers are not warned from time to time that their people preserve the spirit of resistance? ... The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants."
--"In Pursuit of Reason: The Life of Thomas Jefferson" by Noble Cunnigham Jr
"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."
-- Mark Twain
"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"
-- H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.
"A government big enough to give us everything we want would be big enough to take from us everything we have."
-- Gerald Ford
"If the opposite of PRO is CON, then what is the opposite of PROGRESS?"
-- Unknown
"Love is the difficult realization that something other than oneself is real."
-- Iris Murdoch
"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."
-- Albert Einstein
"A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort."
-- Herm Albright
"Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another."
-- H. L. Mencken
"For most of history, Anonymous was a woman."
-- Virginia Woolf
"Where a calculator on the ENIAC is equipped with 18,000 vacuum tubes and weighs 30 tons, computers in the future may have only 1,000 vacuum tubes and perhaps weigh 1.5 tons."
-- Unknown; Popular Mechanics, 1949
"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from a religious conviction."
-- Blaise Pascal (1623 - 1662)
"To 'err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer."
-- Farmers' Almanac
"What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans, and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy?"
-- Mahatma Gandhi
"Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before."
-- Mae West
"Every sweet has its sour; every evil its good."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Love is not enough. It must be the foundation, the cornerstone - but not the complete structure. It is much too pliable, too yeilding."
-- Bette Davis
"But when a young lady is to be heroine, the perverseness of forty surounding families cannot prevent her. Something must and will happen to throw a hero in her way."
-- Jane Austen
"Woe be to him who reads but one book."
-- George Herbert (1593 - 1633)
"The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Be careful about reading health books: you may die of a misprint."
-- Mark Twain
"Where you find the laws most numerous, there you will find also the greatest injustice."
-- Arcesilaus
"A room without books is like a body without a soul."
-- G. K. Chesterton
"The key is to commit crimes so confusing that the police feel too stupid to even write a crime report about them."
-- Randy K. Milholland
"Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love."
-- Charles M. Schulz
"Those that can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities."
-- Voltaire
"The world is our stage, but the play is badly cast."
-- Oscar Wilde
"I opened up a yogurt, underneath the lid it said, "Please Try Again" They were having a contest I was unaware of. But, I thought I might have opened the yogurt wrong, or maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me. 'C'mon, Mitch, don't give up. Please try again. A message of inspiration from your friends at Yoplait. Fruit on the bottom, hope on top.'"
-- Mitch Hedberg
"Internet is so big, so powerful, and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life."
-- Andrew Brown
"There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly."
-- Buckminster Fuller
"There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past."
-- George Carlin
"I detest what you write, but I would give my life to make it possible for you to continue to write."
-- Voltaire