One part miscommunication, one part disgust...
So it would seem a bit odd to go off on a rant past 4 in the morning, but the reality is that I honestly can't sleep. My head is running in circles with all that I have on my plate, along with being coupled with all that I will or could potentially have on my plate.
The past week or so has been this constant nagging drama with work, to the point where I am just sick and damn tired of dealing with people who don't know how to discuss a single thought or concern. They just "assume" that I'm supposed to know. Well, guess what, jerks? If you don't mention it, call it to my attention, bring it up in passing, or I for one just don't notice it, how in the hell do you expect me to magically know everything that you want me to do? That's all this week has been, constant miscommunication.
Let's start with my internship. Now, don't get me wrong, I love the fact that I'm doing something productive, insightful, and something that provides me with experience in the field that I would be more than glad to continue to be involved in. Yet, I also know the reality of the time that I have this coming quarter, so I probably will have no choice but to leave it.
HOWEVER....
Apparently, in spite of my abundant enthusiasm and dedication to the work I do, my congressional aides, or one of them at the very least, seems to have it out for me. To recap her discussion, I'll just mention the following:
1. We love your enthusiasm, but we're concerned about your commitment to your work. (uhhhh...ok, whoa lady, talk about out of the fucking blue. I always give my best to my work, so what in the flying hell are you talking about? In fact, I work too damn hard as people tell me.)
2. You show up late and leave early without telling us. (Okay, in fairness, this is only half true. Number one...even IF I arrive late, I ALWAYS stay for a three hour timeframe, and a lot of the time more than that. Brandon can vouch for that. I'm "supposed to get out at 12:30...but he can tell you point blank that I left there at 12:30 maybe once or twice, at best. I was ALWAYS staying over my time. So you can shut the fuck up about my tardiness because I give you the same amount of damn time. Oh, and don't hold the whole wedding travel day against me. I had to take a bus and get to RWC at 3...and if that is what this whole fiasco is about, then I'm quitting before you have the chance to let me go.)
3. You didn't give messages to Sam's chief of staff or the district director. (Okay, now that's just a bold faced fucking LIE. I sent Rochelle not one, but TWO e-mails regarding the calls she received from Congressman Katz's aide. In fact, when I saw her, I specifically told her in person about the message. So WHY she's saying that she didn't get a message is beyond me. As for Alec, I also e-mailed him about his messages. If he or Rochelle didn't get them, I'm at a fucking loss for words. I did my part and I will stick to it till my dying day and beyond.)
4. You haven't seemed inspired enough to find things to do during the down time. (ummmm...what??? Okay, first of all...I thought I was an intern. I thought I was supposed to be helping YOU. Now, I don't about you, but for me that means helping you whenever you ask for it. You never gave me the impression that you wanted me to pester or hound you about things to do. I have ALWAYS done anything you've asked me to do, without complaints, without anything less than a bright and cheerful attitude because my job is to help YOU and see how a congressional district office is run. I serve constituents damn well thank you very much...and I thought that that was what we were all in the office to do. Apparently, being helpful and reading articles on the internet about politics to expand my knowledge is some sort of cardinal sin. I also take offense at the concept of me doing nothing. Anyone who has had an internship knows that early in the week, say Monday-Wednesday, there is a truckload to sort out and do, and come Thursday and Friday, the latter part of the week, there isn't much left to do obviously because it's already been done. Now....let's think here. If the other two interns have gobbled up the workload before Thursday and Friday when I get to it, then that really isn't my fault, now is it? And....IF, for whatever reason you ACTUALLY are insipid enough to think such a thing, I would really like to hear how the hell you would justify it.)
To make a long story short, even if they decide to end my tenure, I am probably going to leave willingly at this point. How there can be this little of miscommunication in a three person office, I honestly don't understand. How people can make accusations with little to no validity amazes me. Like I said, I have done EVERYTHING you've asked me to do, and if you wanted me to sit and do NOTHING for a three hour time frame, I would do it. Why? Because you asked me to, and frankly, I actually liked listening to constituents. But no....you have to go and pull your sissy and cowardly bullshit because you can't address a problem at that particular moment. The aide I talked with said something very interesting though....
"It's been building up for a little while now..."
Ok, look miss thing....anyone with two brain cells knows that it's best to deal with a problem head on, NOT let it build up. If you do that in your personal life, that's honestly none of my fucking business. I don't give a shit. However, let's get one damn thing straight: You can NOT have that kind of attitude professionally. There are a total of five people that go in and out of the office TOTAL over the course of any given week, myself included. If there is THIS MUCH miscommunication with FIVE people....then whatever goes on here is obviously bigger than just me. It's probably a pretty good explanation as to why there's a truckload of turnover as far as interns go.
So that's part one....the miscommunication section. I could go into part two in regards to Subway...but the important thing, at least to me, is that in eight glorious days, I will be free from the malicious clutches of that deceitful job. Sure, of course I'm going to miss Justin, Chaz, Brian & Kim, and even Tom to some twisted extent....but that job has given me more grief and shortened my life span more than I probably give it credit for.
I must say though....in all of this, one thing that has really gotten to me is the one or two ignorant people calling my work ethic into question. Mind you...one is a fucking college dropout that will never make more than the money Subway pays him as some low-life manager, and the other is one of my congressional aides. How you can question the work ethic of someone that works two jobs AND in excess of 40 hours a week with 6-7 hours of interning, I don't know. How you can question the work ethic of someone that has a double major, is applying to law school, and preparing for the LSAT's at the same time I do not know. How you can imply that I don't work hard enough or more than you is utterly obscene. One of you will never make more than a one figure salary and the other sits in a chair all day being bitter with the world, even on a good day. I have made a success out of myself BECAUSE I work my ass off, and I work hard to get the grades that I do.
KNOW THIS:
Question me, my motives, my intentions...critique me at your leisure, knock me down in whatever way you see fit....do whatever the hell you want to me, because I will always rebound from it. BUT....don't you EVER DARE to question how hard I fucking work, how hard I have worked, and how hard I continue to work.
The past week or so has been this constant nagging drama with work, to the point where I am just sick and damn tired of dealing with people who don't know how to discuss a single thought or concern. They just "assume" that I'm supposed to know. Well, guess what, jerks? If you don't mention it, call it to my attention, bring it up in passing, or I for one just don't notice it, how in the hell do you expect me to magically know everything that you want me to do? That's all this week has been, constant miscommunication.
Let's start with my internship. Now, don't get me wrong, I love the fact that I'm doing something productive, insightful, and something that provides me with experience in the field that I would be more than glad to continue to be involved in. Yet, I also know the reality of the time that I have this coming quarter, so I probably will have no choice but to leave it.
HOWEVER....
Apparently, in spite of my abundant enthusiasm and dedication to the work I do, my congressional aides, or one of them at the very least, seems to have it out for me. To recap her discussion, I'll just mention the following:
1. We love your enthusiasm, but we're concerned about your commitment to your work. (uhhhh...ok, whoa lady, talk about out of the fucking blue. I always give my best to my work, so what in the flying hell are you talking about? In fact, I work too damn hard as people tell me.)
2. You show up late and leave early without telling us. (Okay, in fairness, this is only half true. Number one...even IF I arrive late, I ALWAYS stay for a three hour timeframe, and a lot of the time more than that. Brandon can vouch for that. I'm "supposed to get out at 12:30...but he can tell you point blank that I left there at 12:30 maybe once or twice, at best. I was ALWAYS staying over my time. So you can shut the fuck up about my tardiness because I give you the same amount of damn time. Oh, and don't hold the whole wedding travel day against me. I had to take a bus and get to RWC at 3...and if that is what this whole fiasco is about, then I'm quitting before you have the chance to let me go.)
3. You didn't give messages to Sam's chief of staff or the district director. (Okay, now that's just a bold faced fucking LIE. I sent Rochelle not one, but TWO e-mails regarding the calls she received from Congressman Katz's aide. In fact, when I saw her, I specifically told her in person about the message. So WHY she's saying that she didn't get a message is beyond me. As for Alec, I also e-mailed him about his messages. If he or Rochelle didn't get them, I'm at a fucking loss for words. I did my part and I will stick to it till my dying day and beyond.)
4. You haven't seemed inspired enough to find things to do during the down time. (ummmm...what??? Okay, first of all...I thought I was an intern. I thought I was supposed to be helping YOU. Now, I don't about you, but for me that means helping you whenever you ask for it. You never gave me the impression that you wanted me to pester or hound you about things to do. I have ALWAYS done anything you've asked me to do, without complaints, without anything less than a bright and cheerful attitude because my job is to help YOU and see how a congressional district office is run. I serve constituents damn well thank you very much...and I thought that that was what we were all in the office to do. Apparently, being helpful and reading articles on the internet about politics to expand my knowledge is some sort of cardinal sin. I also take offense at the concept of me doing nothing. Anyone who has had an internship knows that early in the week, say Monday-Wednesday, there is a truckload to sort out and do, and come Thursday and Friday, the latter part of the week, there isn't much left to do obviously because it's already been done. Now....let's think here. If the other two interns have gobbled up the workload before Thursday and Friday when I get to it, then that really isn't my fault, now is it? And....IF, for whatever reason you ACTUALLY are insipid enough to think such a thing, I would really like to hear how the hell you would justify it.)
To make a long story short, even if they decide to end my tenure, I am probably going to leave willingly at this point. How there can be this little of miscommunication in a three person office, I honestly don't understand. How people can make accusations with little to no validity amazes me. Like I said, I have done EVERYTHING you've asked me to do, and if you wanted me to sit and do NOTHING for a three hour time frame, I would do it. Why? Because you asked me to, and frankly, I actually liked listening to constituents. But no....you have to go and pull your sissy and cowardly bullshit because you can't address a problem at that particular moment. The aide I talked with said something very interesting though....
"It's been building up for a little while now..."
Ok, look miss thing....anyone with two brain cells knows that it's best to deal with a problem head on, NOT let it build up. If you do that in your personal life, that's honestly none of my fucking business. I don't give a shit. However, let's get one damn thing straight: You can NOT have that kind of attitude professionally. There are a total of five people that go in and out of the office TOTAL over the course of any given week, myself included. If there is THIS MUCH miscommunication with FIVE people....then whatever goes on here is obviously bigger than just me. It's probably a pretty good explanation as to why there's a truckload of turnover as far as interns go.
So that's part one....the miscommunication section. I could go into part two in regards to Subway...but the important thing, at least to me, is that in eight glorious days, I will be free from the malicious clutches of that deceitful job. Sure, of course I'm going to miss Justin, Chaz, Brian & Kim, and even Tom to some twisted extent....but that job has given me more grief and shortened my life span more than I probably give it credit for.
I must say though....in all of this, one thing that has really gotten to me is the one or two ignorant people calling my work ethic into question. Mind you...one is a fucking college dropout that will never make more than the money Subway pays him as some low-life manager, and the other is one of my congressional aides. How you can question the work ethic of someone that works two jobs AND in excess of 40 hours a week with 6-7 hours of interning, I don't know. How you can question the work ethic of someone that has a double major, is applying to law school, and preparing for the LSAT's at the same time I do not know. How you can imply that I don't work hard enough or more than you is utterly obscene. One of you will never make more than a one figure salary and the other sits in a chair all day being bitter with the world, even on a good day. I have made a success out of myself BECAUSE I work my ass off, and I work hard to get the grades that I do.
KNOW THIS:
Question me, my motives, my intentions...critique me at your leisure, knock me down in whatever way you see fit....do whatever the hell you want to me, because I will always rebound from it. BUT....don't you EVER DARE to question how hard I fucking work, how hard I have worked, and how hard I continue to work.