long time no see...
I can't even begin to describe how amazing life is right now.
I know it's been quite a while since I've written anything, so I figured I was overdue for an update.
School is going really well. I'm pretty much enjoying my classes, the fact that I have 3 global studies courses for my major continues to excite me. I got that feeling I was looking for the first time I went to my Intro to Humanitarian Work class. You know, the feeling where you know you're in the right place. When I heard my professor talk about all she's done and everywhere she's been......I know for sure that's what I want to do. And I'm actually getting the skills to do it. I'm also learning about Global Justice in a different SGS class, which is fascinating and mind-boggling at the same time. Learning the ins and outs of so many atrocities can definately put a damper on someone's day, but the fact that there are so many people working to establish a sense of global justice is somewhat uplifting. However, learning about bureaucracy and politics involved with the UN in my international organizations class is getting tedious. Thank the goddess that I have awesome friends in that class. Global domination all the way. :)
I'm also really enjoying my Italian class, and am extremely intrigued by my Religion and Sexuality class. Absolutely fascinating. And fairly easy. Which is a GREAT balance because of the shit ton of readings I have for my other classes.
I'm an officer for the Global Studies Club, which lends itself to a lot of fun considering I'm the historian. Hooray for taking pictures! I'm also getting involved with COAR - Coallition of Outreach and Advocacy for Refugees - and my girl Sara and I are hopefully going to get placed with a family here sometime in the near future.
I've made new friends, gotten closer with some others, and re connected with some great people from my past. Melissa being one of them. I can't even fully explain just how happy and how wonderful it is for us to be such great friends again. I had really missed her so much....and now, we're back and better than ever.
I was fortunate enough to be able to spend a lot of time with Alex before he went back to Santa Cruz, and I just fully realized how much I love and appreciate him and his friendship. We had so many amazing conversations and heart to hearts.....I'm so happy that we've grown closer. That, and when we party it up with other amazing people like Nori, Jen, Jess, Matt, Whit, Alana, etc....life is GOOD.
I could go on and on about the amazing friends in my life (Vanessa, my Brown, Fai, Margot, Sara, Brendan, Chris, Tori etc.) ....but then it would sound like I'm bragging. The truth is, spending time with these people has been such a positive influence in my current life, and the fact there are no pretenses, no pretending to be something I'm not, no worrying about what so-and-so thinks of me, or whatever other little dramas manifest, is an absolutely liberating feeling. I am my own person, and my friends like that person. That's not to say anything against past friendships that have since ended. That was the past. I've learned to look back and smile because things were amazing while they lasted, but things are fleeting. People change, situations change. And there's nothing wrong with that. Life goes on. It's really what I make of everything that matters.
The relationship issues continue....but I'm not stressing about them anymore. They're not really issues anyway....it's just a lack of a relationship, and still working on getting over some things. I came to the conclusion a while ago...about boy/girlfriends and just friendships in general.....that if someone is supposed to be in my life, with effort on my part as well, they'll actually BE in it. I'm kind of just going with the flow and taking things as they come. And this past weekend, I was actually open about my feelings without that dreadful fear of rejection. It was nice, actually. I wasn't even overly concerned with his response....I just wanted him to know that someone cares about him. Because people, especially this person, deserve to know such things.
I had a phenomenal weekend.....I was an unproductive member of society....but it was completely worth it. My love of techno, trance, house, electronica, and basically the rave music and vibe has increased exponentially. I love how it's all so positive. Just like my friends I'm surrounded by. Tori especially. You know when you spend time with someone, and you just can't help but smile? That's how she is for me. And I love that we're such unlikely close friends. Who would have ever thought? :-)
I've finally gotten over some things in my past.....and although drama still circles around in my life, especially involving recent events surrounding my grandfather's death and my extended family that puts the FUN in dysfunction, my positivity and optimism about life hasn't wavered.
I could go on and on about how much fun I've been having with Veronica, or how awesome it is that I finally quit my job, or even go into the drama surrounding my family.....but the bottom line is that I'm really living my life, and really loving my life and those in it.
I couldn't imagine a better feeling than this.
I know it's been quite a while since I've written anything, so I figured I was overdue for an update.
School is going really well. I'm pretty much enjoying my classes, the fact that I have 3 global studies courses for my major continues to excite me. I got that feeling I was looking for the first time I went to my Intro to Humanitarian Work class. You know, the feeling where you know you're in the right place. When I heard my professor talk about all she's done and everywhere she's been......I know for sure that's what I want to do. And I'm actually getting the skills to do it. I'm also learning about Global Justice in a different SGS class, which is fascinating and mind-boggling at the same time. Learning the ins and outs of so many atrocities can definately put a damper on someone's day, but the fact that there are so many people working to establish a sense of global justice is somewhat uplifting. However, learning about bureaucracy and politics involved with the UN in my international organizations class is getting tedious. Thank the goddess that I have awesome friends in that class. Global domination all the way. :)
I'm also really enjoying my Italian class, and am extremely intrigued by my Religion and Sexuality class. Absolutely fascinating. And fairly easy. Which is a GREAT balance because of the shit ton of readings I have for my other classes.
I'm an officer for the Global Studies Club, which lends itself to a lot of fun considering I'm the historian. Hooray for taking pictures! I'm also getting involved with COAR - Coallition of Outreach and Advocacy for Refugees - and my girl Sara and I are hopefully going to get placed with a family here sometime in the near future.
I've made new friends, gotten closer with some others, and re connected with some great people from my past. Melissa being one of them. I can't even fully explain just how happy and how wonderful it is for us to be such great friends again. I had really missed her so much....and now, we're back and better than ever.
I was fortunate enough to be able to spend a lot of time with Alex before he went back to Santa Cruz, and I just fully realized how much I love and appreciate him and his friendship. We had so many amazing conversations and heart to hearts.....I'm so happy that we've grown closer. That, and when we party it up with other amazing people like Nori, Jen, Jess, Matt, Whit, Alana, etc....life is GOOD.
I could go on and on about the amazing friends in my life (Vanessa, my Brown, Fai, Margot, Sara, Brendan, Chris, Tori etc.) ....but then it would sound like I'm bragging. The truth is, spending time with these people has been such a positive influence in my current life, and the fact there are no pretenses, no pretending to be something I'm not, no worrying about what so-and-so thinks of me, or whatever other little dramas manifest, is an absolutely liberating feeling. I am my own person, and my friends like that person. That's not to say anything against past friendships that have since ended. That was the past. I've learned to look back and smile because things were amazing while they lasted, but things are fleeting. People change, situations change. And there's nothing wrong with that. Life goes on. It's really what I make of everything that matters.
The relationship issues continue....but I'm not stressing about them anymore. They're not really issues anyway....it's just a lack of a relationship, and still working on getting over some things. I came to the conclusion a while ago...about boy/girlfriends and just friendships in general.....that if someone is supposed to be in my life, with effort on my part as well, they'll actually BE in it. I'm kind of just going with the flow and taking things as they come. And this past weekend, I was actually open about my feelings without that dreadful fear of rejection. It was nice, actually. I wasn't even overly concerned with his response....I just wanted him to know that someone cares about him. Because people, especially this person, deserve to know such things.
I had a phenomenal weekend.....I was an unproductive member of society....but it was completely worth it. My love of techno, trance, house, electronica, and basically the rave music and vibe has increased exponentially. I love how it's all so positive. Just like my friends I'm surrounded by. Tori especially. You know when you spend time with someone, and you just can't help but smile? That's how she is for me. And I love that we're such unlikely close friends. Who would have ever thought? :-)
I've finally gotten over some things in my past.....and although drama still circles around in my life, especially involving recent events surrounding my grandfather's death and my extended family that puts the FUN in dysfunction, my positivity and optimism about life hasn't wavered.
I could go on and on about how much fun I've been having with Veronica, or how awesome it is that I finally quit my job, or even go into the drama surrounding my family.....but the bottom line is that I'm really living my life, and really loving my life and those in it.
I couldn't imagine a better feeling than this.