we all have things we don't like to admit.
The best advice I think people can tell one another is not to worry about everyone else. Don't worry about what everyone else is doing, what everyone else is wearing, and don't worry about how people are going to judge you. Because if you are true to yourself other people will see that and appreciate that.
But like most things in life it is easier said then done.
Sometimes I don't care and I don't focus on what anybody else thinks and when I do that, I am happy. For that reason alone I envy the people that are strong enough to do that not just sometimes but everyday. I envy the people that are able to live their life that way.
But sometimes I do worry about what other people are doing. And sometimes I am worried about fitting the "mold" of what I think I should look like. Am I happy once I adjust to the image? Maybe temporarily but for the most part no. It isn't fulfulling.
Who society thinks we should be is constantly changing, thats why the only thing you should look to is yourself.
I would be so much happier if I live this way 100% all the time. I feel like I live in a small college town where everybody goes to the same places, wears the same kind of crap, and is after all the same things. I feel like sometimes I am giving into so many things and it is tearing me apart. I don't know who I am or what I want sometimes. Other times I don't even know what makes me happy, and if I don't know what makes me happy how am I going to do it?!
Sometimes I feel like there are a million different types of advice and viewpoints being thrown my way, and I don't know which to listen to. But the thing is, I don't want to be a follower so I am never content when anyone tries to offer me advice. I always want to do my own thing. I am often just afraid, or don't know how to go about it. I am conflicted and I am confused.
But I am not a consistently upset/depressed person.
My emotions run all over the place. Sometimes I am on top of the world for no reason at all, other times I just don't feel right and I feel like something is off. And other times I am just plain not in a good mood. And like I said, I feel like it is because there are a million different ways I am wanting to be perceived. I analyze way too much (could you tell?) and it needs to stop. I don't know how anyone can be happy that way.
I need to live life to the fullest and not look back on what people think of it. Those people should be focused on their own lives. Besides, if I'm not paying attention to what people think then I'm not going to find out what they think the first place. As a favor to my self, I need to change the way I think about things.