the neck
Maybe I overdid it at Sadhana last night. My body was so open that when instructed to explore Halasana, not only was I able to go into it without any "buildup" (ie, no preparatory movements into ardha sarvangasana etc), but my toes were on the floor and I found myself walking up on my toes as we were instructed to explore any variations. It felt great at the time, but my neck is still so unstable.
Despite all of the metaphysical work and self-study that I do, it seems that I'm missing a piece of the healing... or perhaps the type of injury I've got just does take a while to completely heal. Though I don't know how much I believe that; for I've witnessed (and have experienced) miraculous healings. But in reflection, I had a serious whiplash injury when I was 20 years old when I was bounced off of a trampoline and I didn't have full range of motion in my neck for over 2 years. This whiplash injury that I got in the accident last March is now 13 months old; I do have my full range of motion but the muscles in my neck, shoulders and back often seize and cramp and when I do any asanas that stretch the muscles in the back of the neck I do feel it. I spent a long time just avoiding being on the neck but in recent months have been exploring it. Maybe it is the journey back, exploring, contraction and release, physical strengthening along with the self-discovery.
Last week I was discussing a case with my supervisor from clinical training. I told her that I was feeling frustrated by the constant discomfort of my neck after taking the proving remedy (Aquae Sulis, my love) and she started to mention that perhaps I should explore taking some quiet time to listen to my neck and what message it had for me. I explained that I've done this, and now I'm trying to explore the metaphysical components of this type of injury and symptom, and as I did, she interrupted me to say "I just heard the message in a very loud voice that it's not something you're going to figure out and there is no need to try to figure it out." Typically, she is ALL ABOUT digging deep, understanding the underlying causation of dis-ease or imbalance. She was the one who suggested I try to listen to the message. But she heard that message after we began to discuss it, and she's not someone who gives advice to "let it go" because she is a stalwart explorer of the human spiritual condition. When she told me she heard that message, that there wasn't something to figure out, she said the voice was so loud that it actually hurt her ears and that hadn't ever happened before where she had such a strong message. As soon as she said it, I had the compulsion to go outside and just go for a walk and breathe in the sunshine and the outdoors. We finished our phone conversation and I did just that, and within an hour the muscular tension was gone. Almost completely gone. Throughout the weekend it still felt quite stable and I have consistently done a daily Ayurvedic oil massage. Last night's asana practice may have just been a bit beyond my current physical capacity, even though it felt OK at the time. I guess for now I just really need to listen and take care with my neck.
By the way, the neck in IET language symbolizes not only the commonly known aspects of the throat chakra (which I am in a massive transformative clearing process right now, it's not lost on me). The back of the neck symbolizes threat/support, and the shoulders symbolize our tendency to worship the opinions of others; longing for the good opinion of another; creating and sustaining codependent relationships. This weekend I run an Angelic meditation group and I'd received the message that we're to do a cord cutting process with the codependent relationships, so I'll prepare that meditation process tomorrow. I'll be interested to experience if my own symptoms will change as I do my own self-work with this. I am *always* doing self-work on this, and it's not a mystery, but I sense that there's a huge wave of release happening as I let go of a lot of old stuff. Sometimes the physical layer is the last one to clear because of the density of the physical layer of the energy field. It's the most dense and closest to the physical form, kind of like heavy armor.
That's it for now. xoxo
Despite all of the metaphysical work and self-study that I do, it seems that I'm missing a piece of the healing... or perhaps the type of injury I've got just does take a while to completely heal. Though I don't know how much I believe that; for I've witnessed (and have experienced) miraculous healings. But in reflection, I had a serious whiplash injury when I was 20 years old when I was bounced off of a trampoline and I didn't have full range of motion in my neck for over 2 years. This whiplash injury that I got in the accident last March is now 13 months old; I do have my full range of motion but the muscles in my neck, shoulders and back often seize and cramp and when I do any asanas that stretch the muscles in the back of the neck I do feel it. I spent a long time just avoiding being on the neck but in recent months have been exploring it. Maybe it is the journey back, exploring, contraction and release, physical strengthening along with the self-discovery.
Last week I was discussing a case with my supervisor from clinical training. I told her that I was feeling frustrated by the constant discomfort of my neck after taking the proving remedy (Aquae Sulis, my love) and she started to mention that perhaps I should explore taking some quiet time to listen to my neck and what message it had for me. I explained that I've done this, and now I'm trying to explore the metaphysical components of this type of injury and symptom, and as I did, she interrupted me to say "I just heard the message in a very loud voice that it's not something you're going to figure out and there is no need to try to figure it out." Typically, she is ALL ABOUT digging deep, understanding the underlying causation of dis-ease or imbalance. She was the one who suggested I try to listen to the message. But she heard that message after we began to discuss it, and she's not someone who gives advice to "let it go" because she is a stalwart explorer of the human spiritual condition. When she told me she heard that message, that there wasn't something to figure out, she said the voice was so loud that it actually hurt her ears and that hadn't ever happened before where she had such a strong message. As soon as she said it, I had the compulsion to go outside and just go for a walk and breathe in the sunshine and the outdoors. We finished our phone conversation and I did just that, and within an hour the muscular tension was gone. Almost completely gone. Throughout the weekend it still felt quite stable and I have consistently done a daily Ayurvedic oil massage. Last night's asana practice may have just been a bit beyond my current physical capacity, even though it felt OK at the time. I guess for now I just really need to listen and take care with my neck.
By the way, the neck in IET language symbolizes not only the commonly known aspects of the throat chakra (which I am in a massive transformative clearing process right now, it's not lost on me). The back of the neck symbolizes threat/support, and the shoulders symbolize our tendency to worship the opinions of others; longing for the good opinion of another; creating and sustaining codependent relationships. This weekend I run an Angelic meditation group and I'd received the message that we're to do a cord cutting process with the codependent relationships, so I'll prepare that meditation process tomorrow. I'll be interested to experience if my own symptoms will change as I do my own self-work with this. I am *always* doing self-work on this, and it's not a mystery, but I sense that there's a huge wave of release happening as I let go of a lot of old stuff. Sometimes the physical layer is the last one to clear because of the density of the physical layer of the energy field. It's the most dense and closest to the physical form, kind of like heavy armor.
That's it for now. xoxo