Last day of being twenty
Why do cartoon characters keep trying to sell me balloons? No joke. Some guy in a Woody Woodpecker costume practically shoved a balloon butterfly up my nose the other day in an attempt to make me pay three Euro for it. First of all, I thought Woody was extinct, and secondly, what is he doing selling balloon animals at nine o´clock at night? Crazy Spaniards.
I saw the Alhambra yesterday, this amazing Moorish palace nestled into the Sierra Nevada. It felt like magic, all the wishing trees in the world smushed into one place. The only detrimental factor was the Japanese tourists. They´re everywhere.
Today in class we learned the meaning of the phrase "chiste verde," which means dirty joke. This is the wholesome anecdote my professor used to illustrate its use:
There was once this couple who had been married for many many years. One day at breakfast the husband turned to his wife and said, Darling, sweetheart, we´ve been together thirty years and you haven´t ever given me oral sex. Could we please, please try it? The wife was stunned. No, no, I would be too embarassed, we´re too old for that kind of crazy thing, I couldn´t. Please, he begged, it will be fun, it´s so easy, all you have to do is put me in your mouth and say, Honolulululu. Really? she asked. Oh yes, he replied, just put me in there, close your lips and say, Honolulululu. Well, she was still nervous, but it seemed simple enough, and after a little more coaxing she decided to give it a try. The husband was thrilled. Night came, they put on the boomp'chic music and she began to follow out the simple instructions, but in her nervousness, when she put him in her mouth, instead of the requested Honolululu, she clearly intoned- Españañañaña.
Yum.
So I´ve been having some crazy crazy dreams lately. I don´t know if it´s the food or the bed or the sounds of insanity that drift in my window all night long, but two nights ago I dreamed my parents arranged my marriage to a sixty year old man, a week ago I dreamed I was roommates with Craig and we had a shower under one of our lofted beds, and last night I dreamed about getting high in a bar with circus folks and kissing the trapeze artist who then changed into Johnny Depp. It was amazing.
Break a leg all you little drama kids in the show. WIsh I could be there. I´m off to enjoy the deep fried mystery substance of the day...love.
I saw the Alhambra yesterday, this amazing Moorish palace nestled into the Sierra Nevada. It felt like magic, all the wishing trees in the world smushed into one place. The only detrimental factor was the Japanese tourists. They´re everywhere.
Today in class we learned the meaning of the phrase "chiste verde," which means dirty joke. This is the wholesome anecdote my professor used to illustrate its use:
There was once this couple who had been married for many many years. One day at breakfast the husband turned to his wife and said, Darling, sweetheart, we´ve been together thirty years and you haven´t ever given me oral sex. Could we please, please try it? The wife was stunned. No, no, I would be too embarassed, we´re too old for that kind of crazy thing, I couldn´t. Please, he begged, it will be fun, it´s so easy, all you have to do is put me in your mouth and say, Honolulululu. Really? she asked. Oh yes, he replied, just put me in there, close your lips and say, Honolulululu. Well, she was still nervous, but it seemed simple enough, and after a little more coaxing she decided to give it a try. The husband was thrilled. Night came, they put on the boomp'chic music and she began to follow out the simple instructions, but in her nervousness, when she put him in her mouth, instead of the requested Honolululu, she clearly intoned- Españañañaña.
Yum.
So I´ve been having some crazy crazy dreams lately. I don´t know if it´s the food or the bed or the sounds of insanity that drift in my window all night long, but two nights ago I dreamed my parents arranged my marriage to a sixty year old man, a week ago I dreamed I was roommates with Craig and we had a shower under one of our lofted beds, and last night I dreamed about getting high in a bar with circus folks and kissing the trapeze artist who then changed into Johnny Depp. It was amazing.
Break a leg all you little drama kids in the show. WIsh I could be there. I´m off to enjoy the deep fried mystery substance of the day...love.