i think i have enough to say
well im back from afghanistan have been for almost a month now... and there is alot i have to say well it seems like alot but lets see what comes out and then decide... to answer the first question EVERYONE asks me when ever they hear i went to afghanistan yes i killed people.. never with bullets with mortars and bombs.
but the real reason why i wanted to make an update is the reason why ive been mopy lately. the girl that basically is my kryptonite... erin who talked ALL this crap to me about wanting to expierence everything, wanting to see me when i get back saying that she loves me, and cant wait to see me cant wait to hang out.. and many other things along this line... has basically blown me off... now normally id react in a very VERY rude manner and be extremely angry at the person. but i understand how it happened i dont understany WHY it happened but this is definetly a common occurance to people in the military they just dont understand the situation and dont have the furtitude to be patient or even wait for something or jobs requires alot of our lives and of our time so we have to make personal sacrifices and i used my sleep time to keep in touch with her when i could it seems that the sacrifice was a one way thing for the most part.. we had communication between each other by email and instant messaging quite a bit while i was in afghanistan... and it kept a bond sort of between the 2 of us friendly to say the least maybe a bit more maybe not besides the fact really considering the is a supposed love involved... but what happened to make the whole situation go awary like it did is. i got sent out to a fire base in asadabad for 45+ days and had no communication to the outside world and couldnt have anyway to keep the bond that was there so it failed instantly which i think says something about the person at the other end of the bond considering i still think about her and did while i was there. shit i even carried her picture.. but i finally leave asadabad and head back to psuedo civilization in bagram airfield to get a message about how she has a boyfriend and how all this shit has changed. still claiming to be in love with me... i know what i feel on the situation and its a person that i can hang out with, with out any of the things that normally fuck up a relationship for me which is the physical side... somehow it always ruins it but im completely content with just being near her. but the thing is the thought of her with this other guy makes me almost have panic/nervous attacks. which is fucked up.. so the situation when i got back to cleveland was definetly interesting we hung out and all that for the first day and ive seen her few and far between on the other days... i have a few guesses to why this is happening. A) her boyfriend is intimidated and soaks up all her time because he thinks he might lose her. B) she occupies her free time with her boyfriend because she knows that i go back to fort bragg and will only see her a few days every 2 months or so... or C) all of what she said is a complete lie and im being played for a fool. C is just devils advocate im guessing its either a or b. but there is no reason why things need to be like i can accept the fact that she is with a boyfriend and get over it and just hang out with her but she doesnt even seem to want to do that ever which is fucked up... so im in a dilemma. its cool tho jeremy is coming into town which will take my mind off of her and just let me relax and have a good time with out all the pains that come from dweeling on the situation.
well it was definetly one of my longer posts
but the real reason why i wanted to make an update is the reason why ive been mopy lately. the girl that basically is my kryptonite... erin who talked ALL this crap to me about wanting to expierence everything, wanting to see me when i get back saying that she loves me, and cant wait to see me cant wait to hang out.. and many other things along this line... has basically blown me off... now normally id react in a very VERY rude manner and be extremely angry at the person. but i understand how it happened i dont understany WHY it happened but this is definetly a common occurance to people in the military they just dont understand the situation and dont have the furtitude to be patient or even wait for something or jobs requires alot of our lives and of our time so we have to make personal sacrifices and i used my sleep time to keep in touch with her when i could it seems that the sacrifice was a one way thing for the most part.. we had communication between each other by email and instant messaging quite a bit while i was in afghanistan... and it kept a bond sort of between the 2 of us friendly to say the least maybe a bit more maybe not besides the fact really considering the is a supposed love involved... but what happened to make the whole situation go awary like it did is. i got sent out to a fire base in asadabad for 45+ days and had no communication to the outside world and couldnt have anyway to keep the bond that was there so it failed instantly which i think says something about the person at the other end of the bond considering i still think about her and did while i was there. shit i even carried her picture.. but i finally leave asadabad and head back to psuedo civilization in bagram airfield to get a message about how she has a boyfriend and how all this shit has changed. still claiming to be in love with me... i know what i feel on the situation and its a person that i can hang out with, with out any of the things that normally fuck up a relationship for me which is the physical side... somehow it always ruins it but im completely content with just being near her. but the thing is the thought of her with this other guy makes me almost have panic/nervous attacks. which is fucked up.. so the situation when i got back to cleveland was definetly interesting we hung out and all that for the first day and ive seen her few and far between on the other days... i have a few guesses to why this is happening. A) her boyfriend is intimidated and soaks up all her time because he thinks he might lose her. B) she occupies her free time with her boyfriend because she knows that i go back to fort bragg and will only see her a few days every 2 months or so... or C) all of what she said is a complete lie and im being played for a fool. C is just devils advocate im guessing its either a or b. but there is no reason why things need to be like i can accept the fact that she is with a boyfriend and get over it and just hang out with her but she doesnt even seem to want to do that ever which is fucked up... so im in a dilemma. its cool tho jeremy is coming into town which will take my mind off of her and just let me relax and have a good time with out all the pains that come from dweeling on the situation.
well it was definetly one of my longer posts