three, two, one...
in my head i've already started counting down. three months from today. 12 weeks from today. about 92 days from today. whichever sounds shortest.
another important thing to remind myself: absense indeed tends to make the heart grow fonder.
why is that, hmm? you never want someone so much until you can't have them any more. or at least, in my case, think you're not supposed to have them. some rules just fly out the window so easily when matters of the heart are concerned.
i never looked forward to seeing or spending time with mike as much as i have since i broke up with him, and at this point i'm not sure where we are. together, apart... but as far as the rest of the world is concerned, in his eyes at least - i think i am spoken for. i think i have been all along.
i think what it comes down to is being able to make choices. i mean, for me to realize that i still CAN make choices about what goes on in my life. that i am not completely at someone elses mercy. why should i be? i felt stuck, trapped, tied down. felt like i'd gotten myself into something that i would never get out of whether i wanted to or not. i wasn't ready for so much of this, and you know what i learned from that? you are never ready. for anything, i mean. you are never ready. but some things you have to deal with regardless of how prepared and comfortable you are with the situation. i guess all i am trying to say is that it's funny how much i want to be with mike now that i know i don't HAVE to be with him. ahh, perspective. how refreshing it is.
another important thing to remind myself: absense indeed tends to make the heart grow fonder.
why is that, hmm? you never want someone so much until you can't have them any more. or at least, in my case, think you're not supposed to have them. some rules just fly out the window so easily when matters of the heart are concerned.
i never looked forward to seeing or spending time with mike as much as i have since i broke up with him, and at this point i'm not sure where we are. together, apart... but as far as the rest of the world is concerned, in his eyes at least - i think i am spoken for. i think i have been all along.
i think what it comes down to is being able to make choices. i mean, for me to realize that i still CAN make choices about what goes on in my life. that i am not completely at someone elses mercy. why should i be? i felt stuck, trapped, tied down. felt like i'd gotten myself into something that i would never get out of whether i wanted to or not. i wasn't ready for so much of this, and you know what i learned from that? you are never ready. for anything, i mean. you are never ready. but some things you have to deal with regardless of how prepared and comfortable you are with the situation. i guess all i am trying to say is that it's funny how much i want to be with mike now that i know i don't HAVE to be with him. ahh, perspective. how refreshing it is.