(no subject)
Well, it`s been awhile. But it`s nice to see that a few people are beginning to write that makes me feel good. Sounds like all is well with most of ya.
Last weekend Ash came down to do a photoshoot, with Trish and I. It was great. Trish is an amazing photographer and makeup artist! She just got one of her pic`s in Vogue magazine. She told me this and I was thinking `YES!`. It was really fun, I haven`t seen the photos, but Trish is pretty happy with them.
This part of my journal is a little depressing sorry if you feel inclined to read it:
So while Ash was here he and I had a chat. Unfortunately Ash`s visa ends in July, because he doesn`t have his degree, he won`t be able to stay. It was a depressing conversation, we`ve had it a few times, and we still can`t make a decision. We are both very indecisive. We don`t want to break up, but it either that or I follow Ash back home so he can finish school. What I`m worried about is I may end up regretting that. On the other hand, I`m not so sure I ever want to go back to Canada. There, I said it. It`s not that no one is important to me is there, but I left Canada in a very lonesome, emotional time of my life, and I don`t want to return to it. I love my family we are close, but some things can be unbearable. As for employment, well Canada doesn`t seem to be a good place for the kind of jobs I`ve been considering. Don`t get the wrong idea. I`m not ditching Canada or anyone that lives there. Being in Japan has made me grateful to be Canadian. I made a promise to my Mom that I would come home in two years, but whenever I think of that promise, I get choked up, because I don`t know if I can keep it.
I miss them. The other day my Mom wrote me a letter telling me that during Keith`s birthday, out of the blue he said `I miss Aprille`. I just about cried reading that. She`s also told me that Adam is quite upset, he thinks our family isn`t close anymore. Joel`s not the same, Keith is involved with Lindsay, I`m in Japan. I know and have been told on a few occassions that over the past two years my personality has taken a 180.
Christ I`m confused...
I should go. The more I dwell on this, the more I get dramatic, which isn`t good then I`ll start to feel sorry for myself. I hate that.
Last weekend Ash came down to do a photoshoot, with Trish and I. It was great. Trish is an amazing photographer and makeup artist! She just got one of her pic`s in Vogue magazine. She told me this and I was thinking `YES!`. It was really fun, I haven`t seen the photos, but Trish is pretty happy with them.
This part of my journal is a little depressing sorry if you feel inclined to read it:
So while Ash was here he and I had a chat. Unfortunately Ash`s visa ends in July, because he doesn`t have his degree, he won`t be able to stay. It was a depressing conversation, we`ve had it a few times, and we still can`t make a decision. We are both very indecisive. We don`t want to break up, but it either that or I follow Ash back home so he can finish school. What I`m worried about is I may end up regretting that. On the other hand, I`m not so sure I ever want to go back to Canada. There, I said it. It`s not that no one is important to me is there, but I left Canada in a very lonesome, emotional time of my life, and I don`t want to return to it. I love my family we are close, but some things can be unbearable. As for employment, well Canada doesn`t seem to be a good place for the kind of jobs I`ve been considering. Don`t get the wrong idea. I`m not ditching Canada or anyone that lives there. Being in Japan has made me grateful to be Canadian. I made a promise to my Mom that I would come home in two years, but whenever I think of that promise, I get choked up, because I don`t know if I can keep it.
I miss them. The other day my Mom wrote me a letter telling me that during Keith`s birthday, out of the blue he said `I miss Aprille`. I just about cried reading that. She`s also told me that Adam is quite upset, he thinks our family isn`t close anymore. Joel`s not the same, Keith is involved with Lindsay, I`m in Japan. I know and have been told on a few occassions that over the past two years my personality has taken a 180.
Christ I`m confused...
I should go. The more I dwell on this, the more I get dramatic, which isn`t good then I`ll start to feel sorry for myself. I hate that.