i cant do this anymore...
I'm wearing so thin right now. My patience,my happiness of everything is wearing thin. I have to pray to get into these radiology schools,pass my road test,pass chem regents,focus on keeping my job 4 days a week, prom and EVERYTHIGN else. I feel so hectic right now and all your doing is making it worse. All you can think about is yourself. You probably have no idea what's even goign on in my life cuz you don't remember anything I say. And why is that?CUZ YOU DONT HEAR ANYTHING I SAY. You have no idea how good you have it right now. Not a clue in the world. You life is based on just you. I've done some fucked up shit in the past but thats the whole point of growing up. You figure shit out. I can't take the way you talk to me anymore and how you see life. I can't understand why you're so angry at everything esspecially me. I won't ever get the fact of how you can be with someone for long and still not have a clue of what love is. Cuz if you did you wouldn't wanna toss it aside everyday like it was a penny. I'm a person not an item and I deserve the same treatment that you give yourself. I deseve to go to movies and dinners ALONE and I deserve to have picnics and have doors opened and coats handed to me. Thats whats makes me the girlfriend and your the boyfriend. This is one of your 3 responsibities in life right now and you can't seem to do it. HOw hard is it to see the goodness in people?Why always the bad? I dont understand you and perhaps I never will but why let that happen? Why won't you stop doing this to anyone close to you. Is cuz you hurt therefore I should?But why do you hurt?Why cant I ever do a good job in helping?Why don't you understand me?WHY DON'T I GET IT!?how can you say you love me and then call me all these things.Why do you like being unhappy? You can never accept blame for anything that you do. You can only bring shit up from the past to try and make me look like the bad guy. I see right through you but I haven't done anything wrong to you in a long time. And you have done some pretty hefty things too. It's time to either forgive and forget..or forget me. Cuz I can't live like this anymore. I need to focus on my future.I want you there but with a smile on your face waiting for me,a girl you love. Not me the girl you vent on.I'm me take it or leave it..if you wanna take it,prove it.