Open Fire! Bad Cover Letter Contest Open Now
That's right, do your dangdest, come up with a the most creatively bad cover letter you can, post it to this Livejournal's comments sections (No LJ needed, you can login with other services.) and that's it.
Several of last years had me laughing four an hour.
Several of last years had me laughing four an hour.
I offer you the exclusive opportunity to represent me and my blockbuster book, "Things that Go Bump in the Night." It's an epic comedy with aliens, vampires, elves, talking animals, explosions, sex, and much much more! I'm enclosing the manuscirpt which is 600 pages, so it will be huge just like George R.R. Martin! Just wait until you get to page 450 and something really big happens. I won't give it away but you won't believe it!
I took an online writing class and paid a really big name editor to edit my book, so it's already in good shape and ready to go. She says I have a real imagination.
I can't wait to hear from you! I imagine it will take you at least two days to read my book. I'll call you in a week just in case you need some extra days.
I'm really excited to work with you and know you will love my book! Oh, if you can't get me a six-figure advance, don't bother. But I bet you can. I hear you're good.
Thanks so much! Hugs and kisses!
Dolly Umburger
P.S. That's my real name. Do you think I need a pen name? I was thinking something like Willow Firecracker?
P.S.S. I'm also enclosing an author photo for the back of the book! That's really me and I haven't had work done or anything!
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