Comments | ontogenesis: Hikaru No Go Fic: Desynchronization (WIP) Part XV of XVI

ontogenesis

Hikaru No Go Fic: Desynchronization (WIP) Part XV of XVI

Aug 31, 2009 00:21

Title: desynchronization. Part XV of XVI
Main Characters: Ogata, Sai, Hikaru, Akira
Disclaimer: These lovely characters are the creation of Yumi Hotta and Takeshi Obata. Not mine, I'm just playing in their sandbox.
Spoilers: For the entire series.
Warnings: Ages 16 and up. Occasional cursing and mild sensuality. It's possible the rating will go ( Read more... )

Comments 31

goldenrat84 August 31 2009, 06:10:58 UTC

Wow! Poor Sai, he finally remembers everything and it's way beyond what he could have ever imagined. Then Ogata 'betrays' him again, not even the benefit of the doubt, probably too much for Sai to handle after he's had such a shock.

ontogenesis September 1 2009, 16:50:05 UTC

Yeah, it's a pretty stressful situation for Sai.

Well, to be fair to Ogata, most people couldn't believe a story that far-fetched.

issen4 August 31 2009, 14:53:28 UTC

It's like watching a trainwreck, to read about Ogata's reaction. I had sort of expected him to behave that way, but to actually see it detailed like this... >_< You handled the scene very deftly though.

I'm also quite proud of Hikaru and the way he--with Akira's encouragement--confronted his fears about Sai disappearing.

Looking forward to the next chapter!

Akira felt his stomach wrench a tear began to streak down Shindou's cheek, but he kept his tone even.

A word missing here?

ontogenesis September 1 2009, 16:54:53 UTC

A trainwreck is the exact effect I was going for. ^_^ Ogata couldn't have misread the situation worse, but given his character, how else would he read it?

:nods: Hikaru's had to work through a lot of issues, but he's a strong kid.

Oops! :fixes:

alita_b_angel August 31 2009, 15:10:12 UTC

God, this is my cocaine, right here. Seeing this on my flist was like the heavens opening up and angels coming down with a choir of nirvana and I was all, yesssssss.

Wonderful stuff as always. I do like how you deal with the fall out much more than the dramatic reveal. Because in some ways, the reveal IS just that, there is only so much you can push it for a way of revealing the facts. I think it is far more emotionally satisfying to concentrate on how these characters fit around these new pieces on their lives and deal with this new information.

I'm a little scared for Sai too, because what IF. Having your mortality, your corporality taken away in an instant does seem hugely daunting and scary. But I'm intrigued to wonder where he might go now. The same journey of self discovery that Hikaru did after Sai left?

Or will he just run, and leave Hikaru a little broken in his wake as he tries to create a new space for himself in this new era?

ontogenesis September 1 2009, 17:00:49 UTC

Hehehe, so that makes me your crack dealer, then? :)

I enjoy writing about how the characters react, too -- they're very unique and strong-minded.

:nods: It is scary for Sai. But he has friends, and I think for someone like Sai, that counts for a lot.

Well, I won't give too much away, but I will tell you that Sai isn't going to leave Hikaru again. He promised he wouldn't.

penguin474 August 31 2009, 16:00:22 UTC

I can't wait for the last chapter to go up, so I can curl up on the sofa with tea and chocolate and read it all in one go. (Erm. Pun not really intended.)

He can be incredibly oblivious to some things, especially his own emotions, but he doesn't realize it because he thinks he already has everything figured out. YES. :)

ontogenesis September 1 2009, 17:02:27 UTC

:groans at cleverly bad pun: Actually it might be interesting to see how it works as a long piece, instead of installments. :)

Yep. Silly Ogata!

karorumetallium August 31 2009, 17:42:40 UTC

I've been reading and enjoying this for so long, I don't want it to end... thses characters are so dear to me, and the way you write them is - to me - absolutely perfect. Your portrait of the boys, the way I feel I know Ogata more after reading this fic, the way he's tridimensional now, a human being instead of just a wonderful go player, insensitive womanizer. I understand the reasons for the pace you set, and I LOVE THIS FIC. To pieces.

Thank you. I'll be waiting, as I've been all of this time ^___^

ontogenesis September 1 2009, 17:06:04 UTC

Well, everything has to come to an end... I kinda don't want it to end either, though! I'm happy you enjoy the character portrayals. Ogata -- I've come to empathize with him a lot, flaws and all, over the course of this story. He can be a jerk, but he's not a bad guy.

Thanks!