days off.
gimme loud noises.
my whole family is going mad
this morning i was tossed off
my living room couch, still wearing
last night's dress and bangles,
in a flurry of my mother's fast words
and swollen suitcases
my tongue was numb so i crawled into
my own bed and let the sun stroke
my legs as i slept
i woke up at 8 to the frantic voice
of my mother, her accent
knocking heavily on my door
my brother was yelling at her
while watching family matters
i thought the mix of sounds was strange
and too complex for me to untangle so
i buried my body and returned
to my wispy dream
and so it continued until 1
the cycle of me
lifting my head to see shadows shaking
outside my door then hiding in
the folds of my fraying blankets
there are too many emotions in this old house
my house was a giant, bellowing loud
words to the neighboring villages
i pretended i was a visitor.
i feel like there's hasn't been a month
in my life that didn't include amongst
it's memories of dance parties, procrastinated papers,
and saturday morning bagels
the sound of my mother crying.
i don't know.
i'm beginning to suffocate.
perhaps i am not as well-adjusted
as i tell them.
c