Tonight on "Things you didn't know were missing from your life" theater...

[yummysubculture]

6 Creepers:

1. ISU
2. Broken Skate
3. Advice Scoot
4. Stan War
5. Bad Landing
6. Tabloids

22 Keepers:

1. Evgeni Plushenko
2. Alexei Yagudin
3. Johnny Weir
4. Evan Lysacek
5. Daisuke Takahashi
6. Stephane Lambiel
7. Queen Yuna Kim
8. PChan
9. Brian Jewbear
10. J_Butt
11. Virtue/Moir
12. Chairman Mao
13. Davis/White
14. Crazy Eyes (can be used as PChan if PChan is not in play)
15. Gold Medal
16. Sausage
17. Illusion Mesh
18. Japanese Stans (Can be used to counteract a creeper)
19. DWTS
20. Tin Hat (If you have a skater keeper in play, it can be used to pull another skater keeper from another player)
21. Sparkle Text
22. Mongoose (can be used as Evan Lysacek if Evan Lysacek is not in play)

22 New Rules

1. Draw 2
2. Draw 3
3. Draw 4
4. Draw 5
5. Play 2
6. Play 3
7. Play 4
8. Play All
9. Hand Limit 1
10. Hand Limit 2
11. Keeper Limit 2
12. Keeper Limit 3
13. Keeper Limit 4
14. Double Agenda
15. No-Hand Bonus (No hand, draw 3)
16. High GOE (At the end of your turn, if you have the most cards, draw 1 extra)
17. Low GOE (At the end of your turn, if you have the least cards, draw 1 extra)
18. Bitches Don’t Know Bout My Quads (all numbers in rules, actions become 4)
19. Platinum Medal (The player with the second highest amount of keepers at the end of their turn can play one extra card)
20. Skating and Crying (Can choose to discard hand and draw 3 new cards- if so, that’s the whole turn)
21. Fap Party (Every time you play a skater keeper, discard 1 card)
22. Your kink is okay! (Creepers can’t keep you from winning)

30 Goals:

1. Beautiful Canadian Brave Soul (All 3 Canadians)
2. Party Poast (Sparkle Text, Advice Scoot)
3. Your Russian Overlords (Both Russians)
4. OTP (Any 2 skaters, Tin Hat)
5. Walk, Walk Fashion Baby (Illusion Mesh, Johnny Weir)
6. Team Japan Power Rangers (Chairman Mao, Daisuke Takahashi, Japanese Stans)
7. Orange Mocha Frappuchino (Gold Medal, Mongoose, DWTS)
8. Quad Squad (any 2 with a Quad)
9. Just European (Stephane Lambiel, Brian Jewbear)
10. Bitter Rivalry (either Evgeni Plushenko and Alexei Yagudin OR Evan Lysacek and Johnny Weir.  Invalid if Tin Hat is in play)
11. Oh right, Women’s Skating (Chairman Mao, Queen Yuna Kim)
12.  Saucissons Gratuites! (Stephane Lambiel, Sausage)
13.  Kink Meme (any three or more skaters)
14.  Podium Privilege (Gold Medal, one Gold Medalist)
15.  Secret Pop Idols (Johnny Weir, Stephane Lambiel, Daisuke Takahashi)
16.  Golden Boy (Evan Lysacek, Advice Scoot)
17.  Wake Up in the Morning Feelin’ Like PChiddy (PChan, Crazy Eyes)
18.  Can’t we all just get along!? (Stan War, Tin Hat)
19.  Which I don’t even know what that is (Evan Lysacek, Mongoose)
20.  Team Slut (all Keepers are skaters)
21. I’m your biggest fan, I’ll follow you until you love me (Japanese Stans, Tin Hat)
22. Your Argument is Invalid (You have the most skater keepers in play, Sparkle Text)
23. S-H-I-N-E (Illusion Mesh, Sparkle Text)
24. Evan Has, Johnny Wants (Gold Medal, DWTS)
25. All Hail the Euro-Mullet (Johnny Weir, Evgeni Plushenko)
26. Gay Assassin (Evan Lysacek, Illusion Mesh)
27. So Creepy it’s cute (PChan, Queen Yuna Kim)
28. Rad Bromance (Evan Lysacek and J_Butt OR PChan and Brian Jewbear. Invalid if Tin Hat is in play)
29. Ice Dancing is a Sport, too (Virtue/Moir, Davis/White)
30. Team USA (all 3 US skaters)

20 Actions

1. 6 Beers (if Tin Hat is in play, take it for yourself)
2. Perfect Score (Draw 5 cards)
3. Discard and Draw
4. Corrupt Judges (choose to get rid of one rule)
5. So Whelmed (Resets rules)
6. Early Retirement (Puts all skater keepers back in players hands)
7. Reinventing myself like Madonna (use an action or rule from the discard pile)
8. Creeper Sweeper
9. Watch Party (all players must show their hands)
10.  I forgot my pants (all players give one card to the player to their right)
11.  Free Bitches (no limit rules)
12.  Free Skate (draw four cards, play all four)
13.  Trade Hands
14.  Picspam! (If you have any skater keepers in your hand, you can play them all at once)
15.  Jinx (move your Creeper to another player)
16.  OCD (if Johnny or Evan are in play, discard any unwanted cards in your hand OR discard any unwanted rules OR eliminate one keeper/creeper from play)
17.  Backflip (Discard entire hand, draw 5. Cannot win this turn)
18.  IRL (if Tin Hat is in play, remove it from play back to hand)
19.  Take a nap, bro! (whoever has Evan must skip a turn)
20.  On a technicality (if Gold Medal is in play, take it for yourself)

Download the set here.
Each card is 3.5"by 5", so they can be mounted on index cards.

ENJOY, BITCHES. MUAH!

ALSO! TAG AT WILL.