Ronaldo on the Double

Jun 13, 2009 10:25

Kickette have refused to report on any buildups relating to the Paris Hilton WAG saga, but we're not gonna stop because we ain't got no diginitaaaaaay

#1 - The Daily Mail remains as the Daily Fail

Last night:


but they heard my telepathic cries and edited their article the following morning:


#2 - Two, as in the times the two have met.


(More at the source)
A neighbour of Paris claims Ronaldo made a second visit around midnight to her Beverly Hills home, perhaps to finish what they had started the night before.

A source close to Paris has revealed that the two are close to becoming an item, and quotes Paris as saying: "He's hot, a real athlete - and the chemistry between us was electric. Cristiano's much better than my ex. He was nothing but a low-paid minor league baseball player."

#33963 - The number of medical masks seen worn in the LA area the following morning due to a new outbreak of highly contageous venereal diseases. How are these diseases contractible without sexual contact? Nobody knows for sure but many are speculating that the coming of the two have produced evolved strains STIs and at the moment there is no treatment, well, not unless you follow Kickette's route

CHICAS WE NEED TO COIN A TERM FOR THIS COUPLE, EVEN IF THEY ONLY LAST 4 DAYS

this post was brought to you by:

ballywood, paris hilton is a wag, voldemort, advanced strains of stds, cristiano ronaldo

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