(no subject)
At Sea
"How long have you been here?" asks my classmate when I walk back into the study lounge.
"Oh, uh... I just got here."
The truth was, I'd been studying most of the day but didn't want to admit it because I felt like I was getting nowhere.
***
I get caught up in other people. In the way they live, the way they breathe. One of my classmates mentioned that he'd been working on practice tests (it is two weeks before the first round of midterms) and I sulked for a good half hour before one of my friends told me to relax. He was right, but through the entire process I knew I was overreacting and didn't do a damn thing about it. This is my bad habit. I can't stand to be behind other people in work. I need to be in front, to pretend that I'm somehow on top of my game when no one else is.
When I take a step back I think I'm working hard enough, and I think what will get me through this year will be to focus on myself and not others, to stay humble above all else and quit worrying about what other people are doing. I thought I had this down during high school, but it's frustrating the way that old traits sneak themselves back into my head.
I offer no apologies for the whining.
"How long have you been here?" asks my classmate when I walk back into the study lounge.
"Oh, uh... I just got here."
The truth was, I'd been studying most of the day but didn't want to admit it because I felt like I was getting nowhere.
***
I get caught up in other people. In the way they live, the way they breathe. One of my classmates mentioned that he'd been working on practice tests (it is two weeks before the first round of midterms) and I sulked for a good half hour before one of my friends told me to relax. He was right, but through the entire process I knew I was overreacting and didn't do a damn thing about it. This is my bad habit. I can't stand to be behind other people in work. I need to be in front, to pretend that I'm somehow on top of my game when no one else is.
When I take a step back I think I'm working hard enough, and I think what will get me through this year will be to focus on myself and not others, to stay humble above all else and quit worrying about what other people are doing. I thought I had this down during high school, but it's frustrating the way that old traits sneak themselves back into my head.
I offer no apologies for the whining.