(no subject)
i feel useless, restless, wasted, cold. i can't see past the tears that try to make the image softer, i can't see past the pain that radiates from my gut and catchs my breath in my throat. i can't believe this world would take one of the greatest and most talented people i've ever known at such a young age. i can't help but imagine her, lifeless. she dispised the folly of death! she hated the empty feeling you got when you were ever alone with death. i long to know where she is now, i long to have changed the path, i long to have gone to her when she called, just two hours before! and those that loved her, the suffer the true pain. they say she died instantly, but for us she is still dying, she is not dead. i can't accept it yet. i can't believe. all i can do is cry and wish and hope. she taught me that, hope. even just the day before last, she was still teaching me hope. she still believed in me, so how can i no longer believe in her????????????????