I won't until I Do!
A few weeks ago I spent some time with my family and took several walks around the neighborhood with my little brother Cody, currently age fifteen and a freshman in high school. On one walk we ran into one of his friends, and they began discussing which color was superior of the bracelets they received from a guest speaker at school earlier that day. The rubber wristbands for a cause read "I won't until 'I DO'". While Cody's friend walked with us I did not vocalize my interest but my mind steadily filled with questions. Carefully I began to get more information when again it was just my brother and I. "Can I see the bracelet. I like that color too. Where'd you get it exactly?"
"We had a guest speaker in health class."
"Oh yeah, who was it?"
"I don't know, some lady."
"Well, what did she talk about?"
"It’s dangerous to have sex, don't do it until you are married and you shouldn't get married until you are 30."
"Really? Do you agree?"
"That's what she said."
"Right, you don't think she might be wrong?"
"Um, I don't know!"
“Well, even if you aren't planning on having sex, do you know anything about condoms? Maybe you should keep some around just in case..." "Gross, sister!"
"No, Cody, it is not gross. Sex can be dangerous but it is not intrinsically so if you understand safe sex practices."
"I don't want to talk about it anymore."
"Ok, we'll talk about it another time."
Uncertain when I will have the chance to talk to my brother again, I decided to start preparing myself by looking into the Gwinnett County Public Schools Academic Knowledge and Skills Curriculum. Under the course information on Intro to Health sexuality is mentioned in two subcategories, Disease Prevention and Family Life. Two of the three bullet points for Disease Prevention read as follows: assess prevalence, modes of transmission, symptoms and diagnostic tests for sexually transmitted diseases and HIV. Assess methods of prevention for contracting sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV, with particular emphasis on abstinence as the only sure way to prevent sexually transmitted diseases. Under Family Life there are two mentions out of six bullet points: explain the need to make conscious decisions regarding sexuality based on family values, personal responsibilities, self interests and future goals. Review the nature and purposes of dating including family guidelines, functions of dating, coping with the pressures, and the importance of setting standards for controlling sexual behavior.
This curriculum classifies itself as comprehensive sex education. Organizations like the American Medical Association, the American Public Health Association, and the National School Boards Association suggest sexual education should start in the home. Yet, according to a Kaiser Family Foundation survey in 2000, 79% of parents want their children to learn about sexual orientation in sexuality education classes at school. It seems the information provided to Cody is heteronormative and narrow in scope. Depending on the language used by the instructor there is also a strong likelihood that scare tactics or misinformation are in use when discussing STI prevention.
Sexual education is a result of the Progressive era of the early 1900s, a scientific origin focused on increasing hygiene and behavioral awareness to reduce the spread of venereal diseases. Disease prevention is a crucial aspect of sexual education however it is merely that, an aspect, if we are talking about a thorough communication of knowledge on the subject.
I’ve talked to my parents. They loathe the subject. They have only addressed matters of sexuality with Cody in joking ways. It is not a preposterous assumption that most teens or younger get information about sex from each other, or mass media. I guess what I’m getting at is this. I want to help my brother become a healthy and functional sexual adult. As an open minded person who spends some leisure time evaluating information and arguments on sexuality I think I am preparing myself to the best of my ability. I sense there is a far larger issue and am appalled by the innumerous articles about the fight over comprehensive sex education. There is too much attention devoted to what kids should not know. Instead of complaining or trying to conceal information let’s admit kids know stuff or will figure it out and deal with that accordingly!
An additional thought:
I'm concerned that an earlier conversation I had with my brother has negatively impacted my credibility on the subject matter or his comfort with discussing it with me. A few years ago Cody told me he had learned in school about the "penis hole". I impulsively ranted about how the vagina is not an empty receptacle for male genitalia! I think it is pertinent to eliminate gender bias and any traces of disgust when discussing sexuality but it is no simple task to be aware of how society shapes our understanding of sex and gender identity. Demonstrating awareness AND handling the subject delicately- well, I have my work cut out for me and I'm not an educator nor a parent!
[and this site is useful http://www.siecus.org/ ]
"We had a guest speaker in health class."
"Oh yeah, who was it?"
"I don't know, some lady."
"Well, what did she talk about?"
"It’s dangerous to have sex, don't do it until you are married and you shouldn't get married until you are 30."
"Really? Do you agree?"
"That's what she said."
"Right, you don't think she might be wrong?"
"Um, I don't know!"
“Well, even if you aren't planning on having sex, do you know anything about condoms? Maybe you should keep some around just in case..." "Gross, sister!"
"No, Cody, it is not gross. Sex can be dangerous but it is not intrinsically so if you understand safe sex practices."
"I don't want to talk about it anymore."
"Ok, we'll talk about it another time."
Uncertain when I will have the chance to talk to my brother again, I decided to start preparing myself by looking into the Gwinnett County Public Schools Academic Knowledge and Skills Curriculum. Under the course information on Intro to Health sexuality is mentioned in two subcategories, Disease Prevention and Family Life. Two of the three bullet points for Disease Prevention read as follows: assess prevalence, modes of transmission, symptoms and diagnostic tests for sexually transmitted diseases and HIV. Assess methods of prevention for contracting sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV, with particular emphasis on abstinence as the only sure way to prevent sexually transmitted diseases. Under Family Life there are two mentions out of six bullet points: explain the need to make conscious decisions regarding sexuality based on family values, personal responsibilities, self interests and future goals. Review the nature and purposes of dating including family guidelines, functions of dating, coping with the pressures, and the importance of setting standards for controlling sexual behavior.
This curriculum classifies itself as comprehensive sex education. Organizations like the American Medical Association, the American Public Health Association, and the National School Boards Association suggest sexual education should start in the home. Yet, according to a Kaiser Family Foundation survey in 2000, 79% of parents want their children to learn about sexual orientation in sexuality education classes at school. It seems the information provided to Cody is heteronormative and narrow in scope. Depending on the language used by the instructor there is also a strong likelihood that scare tactics or misinformation are in use when discussing STI prevention.
Sexual education is a result of the Progressive era of the early 1900s, a scientific origin focused on increasing hygiene and behavioral awareness to reduce the spread of venereal diseases. Disease prevention is a crucial aspect of sexual education however it is merely that, an aspect, if we are talking about a thorough communication of knowledge on the subject.
I’ve talked to my parents. They loathe the subject. They have only addressed matters of sexuality with Cody in joking ways. It is not a preposterous assumption that most teens or younger get information about sex from each other, or mass media. I guess what I’m getting at is this. I want to help my brother become a healthy and functional sexual adult. As an open minded person who spends some leisure time evaluating information and arguments on sexuality I think I am preparing myself to the best of my ability. I sense there is a far larger issue and am appalled by the innumerous articles about the fight over comprehensive sex education. There is too much attention devoted to what kids should not know. Instead of complaining or trying to conceal information let’s admit kids know stuff or will figure it out and deal with that accordingly!
An additional thought:
I'm concerned that an earlier conversation I had with my brother has negatively impacted my credibility on the subject matter or his comfort with discussing it with me. A few years ago Cody told me he had learned in school about the "penis hole". I impulsively ranted about how the vagina is not an empty receptacle for male genitalia! I think it is pertinent to eliminate gender bias and any traces of disgust when discussing sexuality but it is no simple task to be aware of how society shapes our understanding of sex and gender identity. Demonstrating awareness AND handling the subject delicately- well, I have my work cut out for me and I'm not an educator nor a parent!
[and this site is useful http://www.siecus.org/ ]