Live from New York...
Umm...I need to figure out how to get on the new Saturday Night Live reality show to win a spot as a featured cast member for next season. It's supposed to be a cross between The Apprentice and Last Comic Standing. I'm sorry, but I'd fucking kick ass on Saturday Night Live...I'd be the next Tim Meadows. But white. And not in as many skits. And no alleged movie career to leave the show for (who even saw The Ladies Man, anyway?)
Still, I want my fucking shot, dammit!
I've even got a character created...Metrosexual Man! I was BORN to play the part!
Case in point...last night I dropped $300 for a 6 session package of laser hair removal for the back of my neck. Tired of it getting nappy 4 days after a haircut. NO MORE! I will be smooth as a baby's ass wherever I choose. They begin lasering on Sunday afternoon...my only hope is that the lasers are not mounted to sharks swimming in a pool.