twenty-one; looonely~ I was so lonely~ I had nobody~ for my own~

[onlyapparate]

It's been a quiet week at the Castle, hasn't it? Has anyone seen Kallen around? I haven't heard from her...

I'm... still around, I suppose. Staying positive and working with Raphael on surpassing his biting phase. He listens to me now, which is an improvement, but... [ pauuuse for sighs. ] I don't think he and Anna will ever get along

Comments

[bobthewizard]

*FINALLY PUTTING TWO AND TWO TOGETHER between Thobari talking about his problems and Kallen not wanting anyone to tell him what she's doing and... hmmmm*

Oh, peachy. At least I'm not locked out of the library yet.

[onlyapparate]

Yeah... From what I hear, Gabriel is... a handful.

[bobthewizard]

...

So I hear as well.

[onlyapparate]

It's too bad... though, knowing Castiel's relatives, I suppose it could be worse.

[bobthewizard]

*oh. frankly that astonishes him -- he only got the relationship out of Castiel accidentally, and if Thobari's talking about it so casually -- hmmm, the surprises are just piling on today*

Hm, I didn't think the relationship was that obvious outside of hearing them sniping at one another.

*glad that Thobari seems like such a nice, trustworthy person, because otherwise he'd have to Take Steps*

[onlyapparate]

You're right. They're really not alike at all, are they? Castiel doesn't seem to like him much, and from the sound of it, he was a bit of a black sheep...

[ You'd be surprised by what Thobari knows, Bob~ ]

[bobthewizard]

No, though I've seen little enough of the new boy.

You're acquainted with Castiel, then? I didn't think he was inclined to discuss such matters.

[[oh, he's plenty surprised already, and possibly impressed~]]

[onlyapparate]

Ah, yes. I knew him back when I studied here. Our relationship has been... a bit patchy, to say the least, but we shared some common goals back then and now we have a sort of mutual understanding.

He's a nice guy, I think. He's just... hard to talk to. [ Understatement of the year. ]

[bobthewizard]

Do you now? That's splendid. It's good to know he'll open up to someone. He must've had a difficult time of it.

[[Strike filtered to Thobari.]]

[onlyapparate]

A few weeks ago, I would have said I wasn't sure, but... strangely, he's truly been a good friend to me. I think he needed someone too. Especially now that his brother is here.

[bobthewizard]

You're fortunate. You know, somehow I don't find it that strange. There are hidden depths to him that I'm not sure even he's realized.

*decides this strikeout thing is silly*

[[Filtered to Thobari]]

Oh, decidedly. It's difficult to know where one is with Castiel; sometimes it's as if the slightest word could flay him to ribbons. *sigh* Things were just going well for him -- why did this brother have to manifest now?

Filtered to Bob

[onlyapparate]

I know what you mean. I think he's spent so long shutting off his emotions that when they surface like this, they overpower him; so he shuts them down even more. Not only that, but this reunion with his brother is bringing back some really deep wounds... I think the only way he'll get over it is by confronting him himself.

I already told him I'd be there for him if he wanted to discuss anything, but it's so hard for him to take initiative that... well, I don't know if it'll do much good. I'm doing what I can for him; I hope he realizes that there are others who worry about him.

Filtered

[bobthewizard]

A vicious cycle well-known to the spirit population. Initiative is a thing of life, which makes it a constant struggle for us. I suspect Castiel is capable of profound feelings, but he must learn to trust himself to touch them.

The worry of others can sometimes be a burden. Not to sound preachy, but I've wondered if developing outside interests would lift it a little -- allow him some cognition that does not revolve around the issues that hurt him.