It's All For A Reason.
It aint pretty, when the world snubs you out of the picture. Kinda like you're stuck in this cookie Jar, and all that's left are the crumbs, cause everyone else's got the cookies. (Yeah I said Cookie Jar. I'm short enough!!)
But seriously, though. When you get out into the real world, it's so much different. I mean, you get so used to life before and the way thing's worked, that the real world can be horrifying.
Did you know that you can live afew years as a teenager, no matter what it was you were. The Jock, cheerleader, goth, punk, the nobody. It don't really matter which it is, but whichever you are, you begin to think you will be for the rest of your life.
It's stupid, now that I think about it, but it's true. Back when I was in school a few years ago I always thought that I was going to be the girl that everyone knew. The one everyone just kinda avoided when no one else was around. You know, that girl that had alot of aquintinces, and a lot of people to talk to, but the one that perfered to venture on their own.
I always liked those solitary moments to myself. It was then that I actually ever got any writing done. Any thoughts sorted out. I had spent the most part of my highschool days being one of those girls that everyone had to stop and talk to. Don't get me wrong, I liked being the one people came to for advice. But, there were so many days I just longed to be like that little guy in the corner of the cafeteria, by himself, hunched over a book. You know, the guy that no one ever spoke to.
Now, the world is much different. With the exception of work, where everyone seems to know my name, and never hesitates to stop me and strike up a conversation, I am pretty much that nonexistant little guy. The one that can come and go without being noticed. Think about it, everyone knows someone whoms just like me.. That person that you only ever talk to when there's no one else around... Like, their only good enough when it's a last resort.
That silence that I used to long for so bad has now become my enemy. The days go by with glory, where I laugh and joke. Where I can smile, and flirt, heck where I can even date. I can be that girl I used to be that always has a smile upon her face. The girl that everyone thinks hasn't a care in the world.
But alone, at night, the smile get's packed away for the evening and I'm left naked as a bird, to face the reality of the darkness. Most nights the darkness was my friend, where I could hide and feel untouchable. Where when I cried I did so without anyone taking notice. But now, I have no wish to hide. I am happy, and thus there is no mask to remove when the day is over.
The real world is nothing like I thought it'd be, and I'm nothing like I thought I would be. I always pictured me being that little girl that everyone liked. You know, the one that wasn't the head of the pack, but the one that everyone made sure to include. I got so used to being the second one in line. There was the head.. The one everyone practically warshipped. That 'cool' one. The one people would be too afraid to talk to less they were 'cool'. Then there was me. The cool one's best friend. The one everyone was comfortable with. That 'all around' girl. Being a part of every highschool group there was.
But in the real world it's not like that. There aren't 'groups' any more and there's definately no 'line'. Once you step out into the real world you become you... You become alone. You're nothing, out there in the real world. Everyone starts new. Everyone starts fresh.
Guess what I'm getting at is don't pride yourself or degrade yourself by what you are in highschool. Highschool, and maybe even college, it isn't life. It's just a stepping stone on the way to the real world. If you're that boy that is nonexistant.. Then don't think you're going to spend your life alone, and unhappy. And for you 'cool' people.. The best advice I can give you.. Don't get used to it. Don't take it for granted, because in the real world, it isn't going to matter if you were the jock or the head cheerleader. Hell, it wont even matter if you were the nerd. Whats going to matter is who you choose to become once you step into that big new world.
Me, I'm still working on who it is I want to become, and I'm not in a hurry to make that name for myself. I'll become whom I become, when I'm good and ready. Until then, I like being who I think I can be. There's no faking around, or pretending I'm someone I'm not. I just.. Am.
The world outside of highschool might be different, and it might be bigger. But it's a world I intend to survive through. There will be times that I stumble, and I'm certain there'll be times I fall. But there wil also be times I climb and times I fly. It can be the scariest feeling, knowing that you have to change to survive, but let me tell you, once you get the hang of it, it be the greatest expeience you ever attempt.
Me, I got lucky. I always had someone by my side whom was going through the motions with me. Let it be highschool, applying for colleges, the working world. It didn't matter, because there was always someone there to push me forward. Mind you, it hasn't always been that same person, but I learned that when you let one angel go, another arrives to take it's place and help you through life. We're all angels sent to each other for one reason or another. I know that as I meet new people, I'm taking the place of an angel that was already there before, and it's my place to be the best I can be, until someone else comes along to give it a shot.
The world is full of angels, in the sky.. And on the ground. Just because you cant see their wings or a halo, doesn't mean their not sent for a reason. There's the angels that are there to help you through school, through moving out on your own. The angels that are there to teach you to survive in the world. To be all you can be.
And then.. There's the angels that are just there. That give you all their love, all their strength, and without asking for a thing in return. It is these angels, that will make everything worth living through... So, dont sweat the little things. Let the angels around you help you through life, so that one day, you can meet that angel that will be worth the living..
But seriously, though. When you get out into the real world, it's so much different. I mean, you get so used to life before and the way thing's worked, that the real world can be horrifying.
Did you know that you can live afew years as a teenager, no matter what it was you were. The Jock, cheerleader, goth, punk, the nobody. It don't really matter which it is, but whichever you are, you begin to think you will be for the rest of your life.
It's stupid, now that I think about it, but it's true. Back when I was in school a few years ago I always thought that I was going to be the girl that everyone knew. The one everyone just kinda avoided when no one else was around. You know, that girl that had alot of aquintinces, and a lot of people to talk to, but the one that perfered to venture on their own.
I always liked those solitary moments to myself. It was then that I actually ever got any writing done. Any thoughts sorted out. I had spent the most part of my highschool days being one of those girls that everyone had to stop and talk to. Don't get me wrong, I liked being the one people came to for advice. But, there were so many days I just longed to be like that little guy in the corner of the cafeteria, by himself, hunched over a book. You know, the guy that no one ever spoke to.
Now, the world is much different. With the exception of work, where everyone seems to know my name, and never hesitates to stop me and strike up a conversation, I am pretty much that nonexistant little guy. The one that can come and go without being noticed. Think about it, everyone knows someone whoms just like me.. That person that you only ever talk to when there's no one else around... Like, their only good enough when it's a last resort.
That silence that I used to long for so bad has now become my enemy. The days go by with glory, where I laugh and joke. Where I can smile, and flirt, heck where I can even date. I can be that girl I used to be that always has a smile upon her face. The girl that everyone thinks hasn't a care in the world.
But alone, at night, the smile get's packed away for the evening and I'm left naked as a bird, to face the reality of the darkness. Most nights the darkness was my friend, where I could hide and feel untouchable. Where when I cried I did so without anyone taking notice. But now, I have no wish to hide. I am happy, and thus there is no mask to remove when the day is over.
The real world is nothing like I thought it'd be, and I'm nothing like I thought I would be. I always pictured me being that little girl that everyone liked. You know, the one that wasn't the head of the pack, but the one that everyone made sure to include. I got so used to being the second one in line. There was the head.. The one everyone practically warshipped. That 'cool' one. The one people would be too afraid to talk to less they were 'cool'. Then there was me. The cool one's best friend. The one everyone was comfortable with. That 'all around' girl. Being a part of every highschool group there was.
But in the real world it's not like that. There aren't 'groups' any more and there's definately no 'line'. Once you step out into the real world you become you... You become alone. You're nothing, out there in the real world. Everyone starts new. Everyone starts fresh.
Guess what I'm getting at is don't pride yourself or degrade yourself by what you are in highschool. Highschool, and maybe even college, it isn't life. It's just a stepping stone on the way to the real world. If you're that boy that is nonexistant.. Then don't think you're going to spend your life alone, and unhappy. And for you 'cool' people.. The best advice I can give you.. Don't get used to it. Don't take it for granted, because in the real world, it isn't going to matter if you were the jock or the head cheerleader. Hell, it wont even matter if you were the nerd. Whats going to matter is who you choose to become once you step into that big new world.
Me, I'm still working on who it is I want to become, and I'm not in a hurry to make that name for myself. I'll become whom I become, when I'm good and ready. Until then, I like being who I think I can be. There's no faking around, or pretending I'm someone I'm not. I just.. Am.
The world outside of highschool might be different, and it might be bigger. But it's a world I intend to survive through. There will be times that I stumble, and I'm certain there'll be times I fall. But there wil also be times I climb and times I fly. It can be the scariest feeling, knowing that you have to change to survive, but let me tell you, once you get the hang of it, it be the greatest expeience you ever attempt.
Me, I got lucky. I always had someone by my side whom was going through the motions with me. Let it be highschool, applying for colleges, the working world. It didn't matter, because there was always someone there to push me forward. Mind you, it hasn't always been that same person, but I learned that when you let one angel go, another arrives to take it's place and help you through life. We're all angels sent to each other for one reason or another. I know that as I meet new people, I'm taking the place of an angel that was already there before, and it's my place to be the best I can be, until someone else comes along to give it a shot.
The world is full of angels, in the sky.. And on the ground. Just because you cant see their wings or a halo, doesn't mean their not sent for a reason. There's the angels that are there to help you through school, through moving out on your own. The angels that are there to teach you to survive in the world. To be all you can be.
And then.. There's the angels that are just there. That give you all their love, all their strength, and without asking for a thing in return. It is these angels, that will make everything worth living through... So, dont sweat the little things. Let the angels around you help you through life, so that one day, you can meet that angel that will be worth the living..