Well, he seems to be watching intently. Hopefully, some of that sunk in. Sinks in? Well, either way, keeps him from sinking. I am so ignoring the little voice that says it is very dangerous playing with fire like this. So I can't give him mouth-to-mouth. I just won't let him get close to the point where he might need it, I tell the voice firmly. Okay, not talking to the voices in my head. That's definitely more dangerous than this.
I give him a smile at his clinging. I'm okay with clinging, but it's probably good that he wants to try it without it. I'm sure if someone stumbled on us during some moonlight stroll it would be a very interesting sight.
"I'll be right here," I remind him. My hands plant themselves firmly at his waist and follow his movements as he very gently and hesitantly leans back in the water. "Doing great, Wes," I say reverting to encouraging and reassuring mode, our fight mostly forgotten.
He does just as I said. I knew he could do it. If nothing else, Wes is a stickler for directions. Maybe he really did just not hear me the last time. Anyway, I'm watching him float like a proud papa, and he really is doing it. My hands are doing nothing right now but keeping him reassured. His arms are already flapping though and I feel like I should let go so that he feel the movement.
"Can I let go? I'll stay right here next to you." I ask, wondering if the water is going to prevent him hearing again.
Toes above the water and flap your arms. Not to wildly, because then you'll push yourself under again. So just gently wave your arms, that's better then flapping. I think the actual flapping will come when we get to the swimming parts of these lessons. Oh! The toes, must keep the toes above water as well. Chin up...ears in the water. Again.
I don't like the ears in the water bit, I can't hear what Angel's saying then. What if he gives me some more instructions and I miss it *again*. That's not good. Forget about the chin above water for now, we're only floating. Only floating. My god, I'm actually floating! I've never gotten this far, let alone stayed above the water this long.
Waving my arms around, I grin up at Angel, suddenly feeling the way a ten year old must feel when they accomplish something very difficult. "I'm floating," I pant, spitting out some water that has gotten into my mouth anyway. Must be the chin above water thing. I'm not getting my ears under water just yet though. Oh! The toes! My flapping falters only for a moment as I check my toes, relieved to find them still sticking out of the water.
"What? No! I mean, not yet. W-wait just a moment." Have to make sure that I have my balance straight. Taking a deep breath, I realize that I'm postponing the inevitable, not to mention the whole reason of being in the lake. "Okay," I whisper, looking up at him a little bit afraid. "I-I'm ready." Flap your arms, a little harder and keep the toes above water. It sounds so easy.
I can tell he's think about everything at once as one part of him moves and then another jerks as he's just remembered that it was supposed to be doing something too. I smile back at his grin. Totally adorable. I knew he could do it, I think smugly.
Woah. Near panic again. I tighten my grip a little so he knows I'm there when I hear the frightened voice to go with the frightened eyes. My thumb rubs over his hipbone in an effort to reassure him. Right here. "Okay. Take your time." I wait as he calms back down and readjusts, and remembers to breath.
I nod once he says in that small voice that I can let go. "You've got it, Wes." I smile at him so he doesn't have to worry about what I'm saying to know what I mean. This is amazing. I'm so proud of him. He did it and he didn't cling or whine, or get frozen with fright.
Another few flaps and he's already a good distance from where he's started. I don't even think that he's realized it yet though. Another couple flaps and we're deep enough that I have to start swimming myself to keep my head above so he can see me. I realize though that my movements might disrupt his floating, so I turn on my back and float next to him, still keeping an eye on him. I'm a little worried that if I touch him he'll startle and really panic. We're not too far out. He can always cling to me and I can swim us back.
Flap your arms a little harder and keep your toes above water. Keep your chin above water. No! No, not the chin, or I wont be able to hear Angel. Flapping arms and out sticking toes. Bloody hell, I'm so glad there's no one around to see this. It's utterly embarrassing, that's what this is. Then again, if there isn't anyone around to see this, maybe we should've gotten us some of the floating devices. Those wings around the arms or that tire around the waist things.
Either. I don't want Angel to get frustrated with me again, nor do I want him to think I'm a quitter. So I have to do this on my own. Whether I like it or not. Whether I'm actually ready or not. If we'll wait until I'm *actually* ready, I'll be around eighty or so. Swallowing hard, I nod at him and flap my arms a little faster, keep concentrating on my breathing and try not to squeeze my eyes shut.
Instead I look up at the sky with the normally beautiful moon and the bright stars. If I weren't concentrating so much on this whole swimming thing I'd have pondered about the fact that those are all small suns and why is it that they don't seem to effect Angel. "Flap the arms," I mutter, because I *am* to busy to concentrate on the swimming. "I think you can let go now, Angel," I pant. My goodness, this is quite the exercise.
I glance to the side and notice Angel is on his back, floating beside me. Oh. Oh! He already let go? Why is he on his back! Shouldn't he be next to me? Swallowing down the panic wanting to emerge, I feel one leg sink down as though on autopilot. A cold fear goes through me when I can't feel the ground underneath my foot.
"Angel?" I murmur, still flapping my arms and now moving my legs as well. I seem to be staying above water, but I don't like the fact that I cannot touch the ground any longer. "Aren't we g-going out t-to far?" I ask, my arms starting to flail a little bit to frantic. "I can't touch t-the ground anymore it seems?" Oh my god, I’m floating! And he’s not holding onto me! I did it! Now all I need to do is to keep calm.
I smile when he tells me I can let go. He looks so relaxed. Well, at least for the couple seconds I caught him looking at the sky. I'm sure we'll try this again some time and he'll be more relaxed about it. It's pretty nice when you're not worrying about drowning. So says the man who can't drown. Yup, pretty nice.
"Right here, Wes." I murmur back to him, reaching out my hand. I can hear that, 'you're not touching me any more!' in his voice, and don't want him to panic more than it feels like he might be. "Just gonna grab your hand here, don't panic." I eventually find his hand and twine our fingers together.
"I couldn't touch the ground either, so I thought I'd float next to you." Which I'm pretty sure is impossible given that I'm really pure dead weight, but whatever, not gonna question it right now.
"You're doing great, Wes, just keep relaxed." Soothing tones, not worried about anything, as if this is just a bubble bath. "Just keep holding my hand and stay calm. We can go back any time you want, you just let me know." Soothing, soothing, soothing. "Or if you get tired, let me know that too." I add just as a precaution, I don't want him thinking 'oh, I don't want to bother Angel about it,' and then end up sinking. That's my Wes though. Take him or leave him, and I'm taking him. Err, keeping him.
Getting your leg up again once it's sunk underneath the water isn't as easy as it sounds. Especially not when the other leg is sinking as well. I'm sure there's a trick to it, a special kick or some such, I don't know the trick though. All I know is that I'm starting to sink and my feet cannot touch the ground.
I'm seriously *not* liking the fact that my feet cannot touch the ground. The whole purpose of swimming is to move in the water without ones feet touching of being able to touch the ground, I know this. I'm not making myself any illusions though, when it comes to the less then an hour of swimming lessons I've had. I still cannot swim!
And my feet cannot touch the ground!
Angel can tell me I'm doing great all he wants. Him telling me that he cannot touch the ground either? Not very reassuring. Of course had I been able to think straight, the fact that *I* cannot touch it, it would make perfect sense that he can't either if he's floating aside me.
"Angel?" I squeak, kicking my legs and feeling myself being pulled under by my movements. "I'm not-I'm not floating anymore?" Oh bloody hell and damnation! His hand is suddenly in mine and I may just hold on a little bit to tight. Still, not panicking, no panicking. There's no need to panic. Angel is right there, even if he cannot touch the ground either. He's right there.
"I can-can't get my legs back up?" I splutter, trying to stay with my head above the water, kicking my legs to try to achieve that. Squashing down the panic seems to be more and more difficult with each kick as well. "Angel?" I cough, trying to pull him toward me.
Cutting off anything else I was planning on saying, I tug on his hand, the grip, which I'm just now noticing is pretty damn tight, is much tighter than before. "Wes, I've got you." I'm trying to stay floating here, and help him at the same time.
I drag him over to me and pull his other arm across me, somehow still staying afloat. And magically keeping his head above water, which I'm attributing to all the kicking he's doing right now. Sort of beginners version of treading water.
I've got a coughing and sputtering Wes draped across my chest, and my arm is latched tight around his back, under his arms. "I'll be your floatation device today, sir." I say, craning my neck to look at him with a small smile once he seems to be coughing less.
My legs are kicking lightly, pushing us back towards land as Wes hangs on. "Ready to go in?" I don't want him to feel like he's quitting, but the more tired he gets with all the thrashing about, the less likely he's going to stay above water.
I keep kicking until it seems like Wes should be able to touch ground. "Feel the ground yet?" I ask, hoping that he can since this isn't exactly a great rescue position.
Okay. Better, so much better. I knew Angel was right here. See how right I was? I don't understand how he can doubt himself so much when it comes to this, but that's not a conversation we'll be having any time soon. He's holding onto me, being my floating device. From mattress to floating device. I knew my Angel was a big multi talent.
The coughing - not that it was much to begin with - gets less, and the kicking less wild as I let Angel help me closer toward the shore. I can't help but keep pushing one leg down to see if I can feel the ground underneath my feet again. I'd feel even better once I feel that once more. Steady ground under my feet and hanging onto Angel.
Once my toes touch sand, I pause and let my other leg drift down as well and sigh relieved when they both can bury their toes in the sand. "Just-- a little bit further," I say, helping him out as though I can actually swim. finally I'm able to put both feet on the ground and stand up, half turning to see where we came from. There are some ripples on the water from where we swam, which we could've easily made just standing still, but I like to believe that I was actually out there that far.
"Did you see that!" I get out gleefully, turning to beam at Angel. "I was all the way out there!" I point, as though I'd floated all the way to the other side of the lake. I'm sure it was barely a meter or two, but who's counting? "And I didn't sink!" Dear god, I'm acting like the child he keeps treating me as.
Oh bugger it, I floated, I didn't sink and I didn't really panic. I'd say that's a huge step.
Taking Angel by the shoulders, I shake him gently, still that stupid grin on my face. "Show what to do with the legs," I ask, "They kept sinking down. There has to be a trick with the legs isn't there? I was floating on my own, all the way out there! Did you see that?" If I'm not careful, I'll do something very undignified. Like, say,...bounce.
He's really pretty calm this time. I have to say I'm impressed. He tells me when he can touch again, and I stop, righting us both, and getting confronted with... a gleeful ball of amazement. Okay, should have been expecting that, but I wasn't, oddly enough, and a smile curves over my face without me even realizing it.
I have to chuckle when he practically squeals with glee at the progress we- no, he made. I nod and smile at him, soaking up the exuberant happiness. "No, no you didn't sink at all." Again, I can't help a soft chuckle at his pleasure.
I can't seem to stop the gentle laughter escaping me as his excitement goes up a notch and he literally shakes me, he's so proud of himself. As he should be. My arms wrap around his waist pulling him close, wanting to share in this utter joy and rapture bouncing through him. Through my Wes. It's pretty damn contagious this joy and I can't help squeezing him tightly even for all the bouncing.
"I'm so proud of you," I whisper in his ear, once his bouncing goes down to more of a wriggling like a puppy. "You did great." I murmur. Of course I'll show him whatever he wants to know. Not sure about any trick with the legs, but we'll do some kicking, that might help.
Pulling back, I can't stop beaming at him and the bundle of energy that he is. One hand reaches up to brush some stray drops of water out of his face.
"I didn't sink!" And suddenly I'm reminded of the way Cordelia bounced up and down when Angel gotten her new clothes. Which is really isn't something I should think about. I'm still getting a bit pissed when I think about the way he tried to buy her. So back to the rather well gone attempt of my floating.
Which Angel seems to find amusing. If I'd not know better I'd say he was laughing at me. But I know he's laughing with. It's good to see him laugh. Or smile. Or quite possibly and even better both. Just like he's doing now. He pulls me closer, my own arms wrapping around his waist. We're half above the water now, apparently having bounced further to the shore. I hadn't notice there was a gust of wind before, but standing here all wet and only wearing swimming trunks its getting a bit cold.
Holding on tight to him, my heart is hammering in my chest with the adrenaline rush coming down. I'm still close to bouncing though, I'm so happy. "Thank you," I murmur, rubbing my hands over his wet back. "Thank you for teaching me." Thank you for the patience you've showed. Even though there was some frustration, we've managed to get me floating without my touching the ground. Now I really want to learn the trick with the legs.
We finally pull back from the...hugging in the lake, and I look at him with that dorky - as Cordelia would say - grin on my face. "That was wonderful, love. There aren't enough words to thank you." Leaning in, I kiss the tip of his very wet nose, grinning when a shiver runs through me. "Now show me the trick with the legs. I want to learn how to swim."
A little shiver goes through me at how charged his words are. He really is grateful, and I did this for him. Might have gotten a little dramatic, but I did this for him. Got him to this point that he can feel good about himself. Confident. That's always a good thing in my book, no matter how we got there.
"You're always welcome." I murmur, the twinkle in his eyes betraying the excitement making his heart continue to thunder. Oh - I notice the shiver that shakes him as the wind slips by - maybe we should get out of the water if he's shivering like that, I note before I'm-
I laugh as he kisses my nose, every part of him still bubbling with pride. Who could say no to that? "Okay, okay, the legs," I grin, but sound put out as if he's hassling me. Can't help teasing him just a little. "You were almost doing it yourself." Leaning back and floating in the shallow water we're already in, I tell him, "Just watch me." There, one kicking demonstration for one persistent learner.
I stand back up from floating and walk back the couple of feet that I kicked away. "Think you can kick and flap your arms?" I challenge him and then give him a soft teasing smile. He so can. It'll be no problem. "Where do you want me?"
"Yes, the legs," I nod eagerly. The trick has to be in the legs. That's where it went wrong. I could do the whole floating thing, but not the legs thing. There's a trick, I just know there has to be a trick to the legs thing. I'l...uh...just make sure to stay in the more shallow water. Just in case. We can go in further when I can *actually* swim.
Shivering, I lace my fingers together, bringing them up to my mouth to blow some warm air onto them. Angel lets himself fall back and I look on interested when he shows me the trick with the legs. What is the trick with the legs? A frown crinkles my brow as I study what he's doing. Flapping his arms, actually its more a graceful movement with his arms. Like a bird.
But it's his legs I need to watch. The trick with the legs. "Kicking?" I mutter, feeling my teeth starting to clatter. It'll be fine once I get busy once again, but in order to do that I have to get this trick with the legs. "But I was kicking my legs?" Is he kicking it in some special way?
"I was kicking my legs," I tell him, a little bit disapointed that there doesn't seem to be a handy little trick. "Do you need to flap them, perhaps? Like the arms? Only up and down?" I think that's how he was moving them. I was moving them in all directions which didn't help at all. But he was moving them...up and down. Oh! So that's it.
"Oh! Oh! I get it now," I nod, blinking when he asks me where I want him. I'm not cold enough for my brain to make a small u-turn with *that* question. Sighing at myself, I swallow hard and look around, making sure I'm kicking myself toward the shore and not into the deep again.
"Just... stay close, please?" I say, not at all ready to try this without him nearby. Very close by. "Just kicking the legs. Up and down. Right." I am determined to do this. I will be able to at least keep my head above water. I wonder how you do this when laying on your stomach. "Up and down, correct?"
Coming back up from the floating, there's a confused and very studious Wes looking at me with something very close to disappointment written across his face.
I nod slowly when he says he was kicking. Well, yes, technically he was kicking, but it might actually have been more like thrashing around with his legs. He's not really looking at me, though, I think he's still looking at the floating me that was there a minute ago, and sorting this all out himself.
"Up and down, little kicks," I nod. "I'll be right next to you." Yeah, as if I'm going to watch him paddle off into the deep without being within arms reach of him right now. Thohugh he's made a wise choice of heading a different direction this time, I note gladly as he prepares for the floating again.
"Maybe after this we should stop for the night though?" I'm not glad to note the shivering he's doing even with half of him in the water. This can lead to no good. No more colds again. Bundling up and cuddling in blankets, okay, but no sniffling and sneezing and all of that. Not a fan of that myself.
Standing close, but not too close, I watch him get into the water this time without my help. That puts a smile back on my face. He really is a fast learner, I don't know why anyone couldn't have found even a few seconds to teach a much younger Wes properly. I really don't understand people sometimes. Worse than most demons, I think somedays.
"Oh. Little kicks." And most likely not the wild trashing I was without a doubt doing. See? I knew there was a trick with the legs. There's always a trick with the legs. Or the arms. At least that's what it looked like when I watched people swimming.
"Hmm?" I pause my getting ready, looking up at him puzzled. I hardly notice my shivering, the adrenaline building itself up again. "Oh, well..." Stop for the night? But what if it works! I mean, then I can float without his help, it'll only be a small step toward the actual swimming. Right? Right?
"Maybe," I say distracted, already concentrating on getting ready to float on my back again. "Lets see how it goes. I mean... I want to learn how to float on my front too." Floating isn't swimming. Floating is, well, floating. I wanted to learn how to swim, so that Angel can be proud of me. And himself for teaching me.
"Okay," I mutter, licking my lips a little nervously. Oh, they're getting a tad cold. "Here we go. On my back," I mutter, "toes sticking up, arms flapping." And while I do just that, there's a brief reminder of Angel and how he was learning to use the computer. Seems that saying what you're doing out-loud is a 'learning' thing.
Slowly pushing my breath out, I lay there on my back, finding my balance a little bit easier this time. My eyes keep searching Angel's, wanting to know if I'm still doing it right. "Little kick. Up and down." I push my breath out again before starting to move my legs up and down and... I'm moving.
"Oh! The arms!" I remind myself quickly, moving them as well as my legs. "I'm moving!" Some water gets in my mouth again, once more leaving me spluttering. Can't seem to care though, because I'm moving. Which is what I keep telling Angel between the coughing and the actual moving, huge grin on my face.
Oh. Oh now I really want to learn how to do that on my stomach!
He is...totally ignoring me. I cross my arms as he totally, obliviously, shrugs off me and my worries about it being cold. I huff a little, but continue standing guard next to him.
"Wes," I start but then decide to forget it since he can't hear me anyway. He's stuck in floating land, concentrating as hard as he can on each step.
I can't help smiling in spite of my slight annoyance about being ignored, but he really is so cute about the success he's made. I, of course, grin back without even having the chance to school myself not to and be stern. My little fish. No more Tiger, but a happy little Fish.
Hey, conveniently, I can just walk beside him since we're staying in the shallows. This way I can see his face too. See the huge grin in spite of swallowing probably gallons of lake water.
I notice that we're getting kind of far away from the blanket. "Wes, Wes we should probably turn around." He really gotten pretty far with the flapping and kicking. It's starting to get kind of rocky under my feet though and I don't think we want to get lost. Plus, hello, cold. The breeze cools my skin, and even though I don't shiver, I do feel it.
Wes is still happily paddling along though. I get up close enough to him now that I can touch him. "Wes," I nod my head back the way we came. "You wanna turn around and swim back the other way?" Yes, I said swim, I think with a smile.
This is...this is wonderful! I imagine it's even better when you really know how to swim. It's like flying through the water. There's this odd sense of freedom and a carefree feeling taking over. It's fun! Well, no wonder father never thought it necessary for me to learn how to swim until it was to late.
I keep flapping my arms and kicking my legs, - small kick - while grinning like an idiot. I'm pretty sure I look the part as well. The idiot part that is. Angel is smiling too, he doesn't look like an idiot too. He should be smiling, he's the one who's taught me this. Just like I kept telling him I would.
"What?" I yell, realizing that the whole swallowing the lake has made me follow his tip about keeping my chin up. Only now my ears are below the water and I can't hear him. He's pretty close by though, so I reach out to take his hand and use it to put myself on my feet again. I'm sure there's a trick to getting on ones feet without help as well.
"What did you...Oh! Woops!" Sort of wobbly here. Looks like the sand ground made way for rocks? "Goodness, look how far I've floated," I say with a sense of awe. I did that. I floated all that way without panicking! Wow. I never thought that was ever going to be possible. It's also getting rather cold. Didn't think the wind was that cold, but be because I'm wet. Obviously.
"You want to go back?" I ask, his words finally filtering through. I glance at the blanket which *is* rather further away then it was. "Alright," I nod, ignoring my clattering teeth. "But I want to try it on my stomach now!" Nodding eagerly, I beam at him. "Show me how to do that, please?"
I give him a smile at his clinging. I'm okay with clinging, but it's probably good that he wants to try it without it. I'm sure if someone stumbled on us during some moonlight stroll it would be a very interesting sight.
"I'll be right here," I remind him. My hands plant themselves firmly at his waist and follow his movements as he very gently and hesitantly leans back in the water. "Doing great, Wes," I say reverting to encouraging and reassuring mode, our fight mostly forgotten.
He does just as I said. I knew he could do it. If nothing else, Wes is a stickler for directions. Maybe he really did just not hear me the last time. Anyway, I'm watching him float like a proud papa, and he really is doing it. My hands are doing nothing right now but keeping him reassured. His arms are already flapping though and I feel like I should let go so that he feel the movement.
"Can I let go? I'll stay right here next to you." I ask, wondering if the water is going to prevent him hearing again.
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I don't like the ears in the water bit, I can't hear what Angel's saying then. What if he gives me some more instructions and I miss it *again*. That's not good. Forget about the chin above water for now, we're only floating. Only floating. My god, I'm actually floating! I've never gotten this far, let alone stayed above the water this long.
Waving my arms around, I grin up at Angel, suddenly feeling the way a ten year old must feel when they accomplish something very difficult. "I'm floating," I pant, spitting out some water that has gotten into my mouth anyway. Must be the chin above water thing. I'm not getting my ears under water just yet though. Oh! The toes! My flapping falters only for a moment as I check my toes, relieved to find them still sticking out of the water.
"What? No! I mean, not yet. W-wait just a moment." Have to make sure that I have my balance straight. Taking a deep breath, I realize that I'm postponing the inevitable, not to mention the whole reason of being in the lake. "Okay," I whisper, looking up at him a little bit afraid. "I-I'm ready." Flap your arms, a little harder and keep the toes above water. It sounds so easy.
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Woah. Near panic again. I tighten my grip a little so he knows I'm there when I hear the frightened voice to go with the frightened eyes. My thumb rubs over his hipbone in an effort to reassure him. Right here. "Okay. Take your time." I wait as he calms back down and readjusts, and remembers to breath.
I nod once he says in that small voice that I can let go. "You've got it, Wes." I smile at him so he doesn't have to worry about what I'm saying to know what I mean. This is amazing. I'm so proud of him. He did it and he didn't cling or whine, or get frozen with fright.
Another few flaps and he's already a good distance from where he's started. I don't even think that he's realized it yet though. Another couple flaps and we're deep enough that I have to start swimming myself to keep my head above so he can see me. I realize though that my movements might disrupt his floating, so I turn on my back and float next to him, still keeping an eye on him. I'm a little worried that if I touch him he'll startle and really panic. We're not too far out. He can always cling to me and I can swim us back.
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Either. I don't want Angel to get frustrated with me again, nor do I want him to think I'm a quitter. So I have to do this on my own. Whether I like it or not. Whether I'm actually ready or not. If we'll wait until I'm *actually* ready, I'll be around eighty or so. Swallowing hard, I nod at him and flap my arms a little faster, keep concentrating on my breathing and try not to squeeze my eyes shut.
Instead I look up at the sky with the normally beautiful moon and the bright stars. If I weren't concentrating so much on this whole swimming thing I'd have pondered about the fact that those are all small suns and why is it that they don't seem to effect Angel. "Flap the arms," I mutter, because I *am* to busy to concentrate on the swimming. "I think you can let go now, Angel," I pant. My goodness, this is quite the exercise.
I glance to the side and notice Angel is on his back, floating beside me. Oh. Oh! He already let go? Why is he on his back! Shouldn't he be next to me? Swallowing down the panic wanting to emerge, I feel one leg sink down as though on autopilot. A cold fear goes through me when I can't feel the ground underneath my foot.
"Angel?" I murmur, still flapping my arms and now moving my legs as well. I seem to be staying above water, but I don't like the fact that I cannot touch the ground any longer. "Aren't we g-going out t-to far?" I ask, my arms starting to flail a little bit to frantic. "I can't touch t-the ground anymore it seems?" Oh my god, I’m floating! And he’s not holding onto me! I did it! Now all I need to do is to keep calm.
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"Right here, Wes." I murmur back to him, reaching out my hand. I can hear that, 'you're not touching me any more!' in his voice, and don't want him to panic more than it feels like he might be. "Just gonna grab your hand here, don't panic." I eventually find his hand and twine our fingers together.
"I couldn't touch the ground either, so I thought I'd float next to you." Which I'm pretty sure is impossible given that I'm really pure dead weight, but whatever, not gonna question it right now.
"You're doing great, Wes, just keep relaxed." Soothing tones, not worried about anything, as if this is just a bubble bath. "Just keep holding my hand and stay calm. We can go back any time you want, you just let me know." Soothing, soothing, soothing. "Or if you get tired, let me know that too." I add just as a precaution, I don't want him thinking 'oh, I don't want to bother Angel about it,' and then end up sinking. That's my Wes though. Take him or leave him, and I'm taking him. Err, keeping him.
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I'm seriously *not* liking the fact that my feet cannot touch the ground. The whole purpose of swimming is to move in the water without ones feet touching of being able to touch the ground, I know this. I'm not making myself any illusions though, when it comes to the less then an hour of swimming lessons I've had. I still cannot swim!
And my feet cannot touch the ground!
Angel can tell me I'm doing great all he wants. Him telling me that he cannot touch the ground either? Not very reassuring. Of course had I been able to think straight, the fact that *I* cannot touch it, it would make perfect sense that he can't either if he's floating aside me.
"Angel?" I squeak, kicking my legs and feeling myself being pulled under by my movements. "I'm not-I'm not floating anymore?" Oh bloody hell and damnation! His hand is suddenly in mine and I may just hold on a little bit to tight. Still, not panicking, no panicking. There's no need to panic. Angel is right there, even if he cannot touch the ground either. He's right there.
"I can-can't get my legs back up?" I splutter, trying to stay with my head above the water, kicking my legs to try to achieve that. Squashing down the panic seems to be more and more difficult with each kick as well. "Angel?" I cough, trying to pull him toward me.
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I drag him over to me and pull his other arm across me, somehow still staying afloat. And magically keeping his head above water, which I'm attributing to all the kicking he's doing right now. Sort of beginners version of treading water.
I've got a coughing and sputtering Wes draped across my chest, and my arm is latched tight around his back, under his arms. "I'll be your floatation device today, sir." I say, craning my neck to look at him with a small smile once he seems to be coughing less.
My legs are kicking lightly, pushing us back towards land as Wes hangs on. "Ready to go in?" I don't want him to feel like he's quitting, but the more tired he gets with all the thrashing about, the less likely he's going to stay above water.
I keep kicking until it seems like Wes should be able to touch ground. "Feel the ground yet?" I ask, hoping that he can since this isn't exactly a great rescue position.
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The coughing - not that it was much to begin with - gets less, and the kicking less wild as I let Angel help me closer toward the shore. I can't help but keep pushing one leg down to see if I can feel the ground underneath my feet again. I'd feel even better once I feel that once more. Steady ground under my feet and hanging onto Angel.
Once my toes touch sand, I pause and let my other leg drift down as well and sigh relieved when they both can bury their toes in the sand. "Just-- a little bit further," I say, helping him out as though I can actually swim. finally I'm able to put both feet on the ground and stand up, half turning to see where we came from. There are some ripples on the water from where we swam, which we could've easily made just standing still, but I like to believe that I was actually out there that far.
"Did you see that!" I get out gleefully, turning to beam at Angel. "I was all the way out there!" I point, as though I'd floated all the way to the other side of the lake. I'm sure it was barely a meter or two, but who's counting? "And I didn't sink!" Dear god, I'm acting like the child he keeps treating me as.
Oh bugger it, I floated, I didn't sink and I didn't really panic. I'd say that's a huge step.
Taking Angel by the shoulders, I shake him gently, still that stupid grin on my face. "Show what to do with the legs," I ask, "They kept sinking down. There has to be a trick with the legs isn't there? I was floating on my own, all the way out there! Did you see that?" If I'm not careful, I'll do something very undignified. Like, say,...bounce.
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I have to chuckle when he practically squeals with glee at the progress we- no, he made. I nod and smile at him, soaking up the exuberant happiness. "No, no you didn't sink at all." Again, I can't help a soft chuckle at his pleasure.
I can't seem to stop the gentle laughter escaping me as his excitement goes up a notch and he literally shakes me, he's so proud of himself. As he should be. My arms wrap around his waist pulling him close, wanting to share in this utter joy and rapture bouncing through him. Through my Wes. It's pretty damn contagious this joy and I can't help squeezing him tightly even for all the bouncing.
"I'm so proud of you," I whisper in his ear, once his bouncing goes down to more of a wriggling like a puppy. "You did great." I murmur. Of course I'll show him whatever he wants to know. Not sure about any trick with the legs, but we'll do some kicking, that might help.
Pulling back, I can't stop beaming at him and the bundle of energy that he is. One hand reaches up to brush some stray drops of water out of his face.
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Which Angel seems to find amusing. If I'd not know better I'd say he was laughing at me. But I know he's laughing with. It's good to see him laugh. Or smile. Or quite possibly and even better both. Just like he's doing now. He pulls me closer, my own arms wrapping around his waist. We're half above the water now, apparently having bounced further to the shore. I hadn't notice there was a gust of wind before, but standing here all wet and only wearing swimming trunks its getting a bit cold.
Holding on tight to him, my heart is hammering in my chest with the adrenaline rush coming down. I'm still close to bouncing though, I'm so happy. "Thank you," I murmur, rubbing my hands over his wet back. "Thank you for teaching me." Thank you for the patience you've showed. Even though there was some frustration, we've managed to get me floating without my touching the ground. Now I really want to learn the trick with the legs.
We finally pull back from the...hugging in the lake, and I look at him with that dorky - as Cordelia would say - grin on my face. "That was wonderful, love. There aren't enough words to thank you." Leaning in, I kiss the tip of his very wet nose, grinning when a shiver runs through me. "Now show me the trick with the legs. I want to learn how to swim."
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"You're always welcome." I murmur, the twinkle in his eyes betraying the excitement making his heart continue to thunder. Oh - I notice the shiver that shakes him as the wind slips by - maybe we should get out of the water if he's shivering like that, I note before I'm-
I laugh as he kisses my nose, every part of him still bubbling with pride. Who could say no to that? "Okay, okay, the legs," I grin, but sound put out as if he's hassling me. Can't help teasing him just a little. "You were almost doing it yourself." Leaning back and floating in the shallow water we're already in, I tell him, "Just watch me." There, one kicking demonstration for one persistent learner.
I stand back up from floating and walk back the couple of feet that I kicked away. "Think you can kick and flap your arms?" I challenge him and then give him a soft teasing smile. He so can. It'll be no problem. "Where do you want me?"
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Shivering, I lace my fingers together, bringing them up to my mouth to blow some warm air onto them. Angel lets himself fall back and I look on interested when he shows me the trick with the legs. What is the trick with the legs? A frown crinkles my brow as I study what he's doing. Flapping his arms, actually its more a graceful movement with his arms. Like a bird.
But it's his legs I need to watch. The trick with the legs. "Kicking?" I mutter, feeling my teeth starting to clatter. It'll be fine once I get busy once again, but in order to do that I have to get this trick with the legs. "But I was kicking my legs?" Is he kicking it in some special way?
"I was kicking my legs," I tell him, a little bit disapointed that there doesn't seem to be a handy little trick. "Do you need to flap them, perhaps? Like the arms? Only up and down?" I think that's how he was moving them. I was moving them in all directions which didn't help at all. But he was moving them...up and down. Oh! So that's it.
"Oh! Oh! I get it now," I nod, blinking when he asks me where I want him. I'm not cold enough for my brain to make a small u-turn with *that* question. Sighing at myself, I swallow hard and look around, making sure I'm kicking myself toward the shore and not into the deep again.
"Just... stay close, please?" I say, not at all ready to try this without him nearby. Very close by. "Just kicking the legs. Up and down. Right." I am determined to do this. I will be able to at least keep my head above water. I wonder how you do this when laying on your stomach. "Up and down, correct?"
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I nod slowly when he says he was kicking. Well, yes, technically he was kicking, but it might actually have been more like thrashing around with his legs. He's not really looking at me, though, I think he's still looking at the floating me that was there a minute ago, and sorting this all out himself.
"Up and down, little kicks," I nod. "I'll be right next to you." Yeah, as if I'm going to watch him paddle off into the deep without being within arms reach of him right now. Thohugh he's made a wise choice of heading a different direction this time, I note gladly as he prepares for the floating again.
"Maybe after this we should stop for the night though?" I'm not glad to note the shivering he's doing even with half of him in the water. This can lead to no good. No more colds again. Bundling up and cuddling in blankets, okay, but no sniffling and sneezing and all of that. Not a fan of that myself.
Standing close, but not too close, I watch him get into the water this time without my help. That puts a smile back on my face. He really is a fast learner, I don't know why anyone couldn't have found even a few seconds to teach a much younger Wes properly. I really don't understand people sometimes. Worse than most demons, I think somedays.
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"Hmm?" I pause my getting ready, looking up at him puzzled. I hardly notice my shivering, the adrenaline building itself up again. "Oh, well..." Stop for the night? But what if it works! I mean, then I can float without his help, it'll only be a small step toward the actual swimming. Right? Right?
"Maybe," I say distracted, already concentrating on getting ready to float on my back again. "Lets see how it goes. I mean... I want to learn how to float on my front too." Floating isn't swimming. Floating is, well, floating. I wanted to learn how to swim, so that Angel can be proud of me. And himself for teaching me.
"Okay," I mutter, licking my lips a little nervously. Oh, they're getting a tad cold. "Here we go. On my back," I mutter, "toes sticking up, arms flapping." And while I do just that, there's a brief reminder of Angel and how he was learning to use the computer. Seems that saying what you're doing out-loud is a 'learning' thing.
Slowly pushing my breath out, I lay there on my back, finding my balance a little bit easier this time. My eyes keep searching Angel's, wanting to know if I'm still doing it right. "Little kick. Up and down." I push my breath out again before starting to move my legs up and down and... I'm moving.
"Oh! The arms!" I remind myself quickly, moving them as well as my legs. "I'm moving!" Some water gets in my mouth again, once more leaving me spluttering. Can't seem to care though, because I'm moving. Which is what I keep telling Angel between the coughing and the actual moving, huge grin on my face.
Oh. Oh now I really want to learn how to do that on my stomach!
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"Wes," I start but then decide to forget it since he can't hear me anyway. He's stuck in floating land, concentrating as hard as he can on each step.
I can't help smiling in spite of my slight annoyance about being ignored, but he really is so cute about the success he's made. I, of course, grin back without even having the chance to school myself not to and be stern. My little fish. No more Tiger, but a happy little Fish.
Hey, conveniently, I can just walk beside him since we're staying in the shallows. This way I can see his face too. See the huge grin in spite of swallowing probably gallons of lake water.
I notice that we're getting kind of far away from the blanket. "Wes, Wes we should probably turn around." He really gotten pretty far with the flapping and kicking. It's starting to get kind of rocky under my feet though and I don't think we want to get lost. Plus, hello, cold. The breeze cools my skin, and even though I don't shiver, I do feel it.
Wes is still happily paddling along though. I get up close enough to him now that I can touch him. "Wes," I nod my head back the way we came. "You wanna turn around and swim back the other way?" Yes, I said swim, I think with a smile.
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I keep flapping my arms and kicking my legs, - small kick - while grinning like an idiot. I'm pretty sure I look the part as well. The idiot part that is. Angel is smiling too, he doesn't look like an idiot too. He should be smiling, he's the one who's taught me this. Just like I kept telling him I would.
"What?" I yell, realizing that the whole swallowing the lake has made me follow his tip about keeping my chin up. Only now my ears are below the water and I can't hear him. He's pretty close by though, so I reach out to take his hand and use it to put myself on my feet again. I'm sure there's a trick to getting on ones feet without help as well.
"What did you...Oh! Woops!" Sort of wobbly here. Looks like the sand ground made way for rocks? "Goodness, look how far I've floated," I say with a sense of awe. I did that. I floated all that way without panicking! Wow. I never thought that was ever going to be possible. It's also getting rather cold. Didn't think the wind was that cold, but be because I'm wet. Obviously.
"You want to go back?" I ask, his words finally filtering through. I glance at the blanket which *is* rather further away then it was. "Alright," I nod, ignoring my clattering teeth. "But I want to try it on my stomach now!" Nodding eagerly, I beam at him. "Show me how to do that, please?"
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