Jun 30, 2010 12:01
Hi All,
Just wanted to introduce myself to the group. . . hopefully make a few friends who know what it's like to not have the person you most want to be with right next to you. If you'd like to be friends, please send me a message or friend my journal. It's tough having an online relationship, and I'd love to meet some people in the same situation.
I'm Amy, and I'm 30-years-old with one child, a 6-year-old girl. I left my ex when I was pregnant because we disagreed on keeping the baby. I wanted her, he didn't. We didn't get divorced until she was four because he kept saying he wanted to try, and I kept trying even though we didn't live together again. I swore long before I got divorced that no matter what happened I would never be in another relationship. Jubeda's had very minimal contact with her father, but recently he called to tell her that she has a little brother who is one, and he's called every few days since then. I don't know why, and I hope he doesn't hurt her. He has a habit of calling for a few weeks and then not calling for months or even a year. She also has a little half sister he never intended for us to know about, but her mom found me, and the girls are as close as they can be long distance.
Dave is 50, and he's got two boys, 14 and 10. He started out as a friend. A e-pal type thing. I've always had pen pals. Anyway, for a long time we didn't really get to know each other. Then my dad became very ill, and he knew how I felt cause he'd gone through the same thing with his mother. We started talking more. Got to know each other. Talked about our past marriages. And when I became really ill, he was always there when I needed him. Anytime.
At some point we crossed over from friends. I don't know exactly when. He saw it before I did, and he tried to warn me. He worried about our age difference, about the distance. I'm in the USA and he's in the UK. I brushed his thoughts aside until it was too late. I was his. I was his first, he kept his distance. But he became mine, too.
We've been talking for more than three years now. I was supposed to go visit this summer, but I ended up with some messy health issues, so we've had to postpone it. And it's nearly killing both of us. We're going insane. It's not easy to be so far apart. And with my health issues mean I can't afford a cell phone at the moment so we can't even text.