something good for a change...
So, many of my latest entries have been bad. Not all is bad with me, honest, and I would like to say something positive.
I feel better.
I feel pretty good actually. I'm still dealing with some pretty fucked up shit but all in all I'm feeling much better.
Things are better with my boyfriend, not fixed, but so much improved that it almost might as well be. He's more open, I'm more open...it's good.
I was concerned that therapy wasn't going to work for me, but it's actually been awesome in that it's taken me out of the hamster wheel I'd been stuck in, endlessly running in place and nothing ever changing, to a hamster wheel that can be nudged and moved to be able to see things from different angles and also to leave the rut I'd been in.
Prozac helps too. A lot.
Things are going fairly well at work. Not as much drama as there has been, for which I'm very glad.
I have 2 wonderful and silly kitties and an old dog that doesn't know he's old. Life's pretty good there, everyone is healthy at the moment.
In 2 days I will be having a procedure to permanently sterilize myself. In essence, I'm getting spayed. This is bringing me no end of joy and in 3 months when I have my radiograph to ensure 100% blockage I WILL be having a party to celebrate.
Most of all I'm glad that I'm not dealing with the magma chamber of rage every day. I'm calmer, more rational, more able to deal with the issues in my life that make me react the way I have been. I'm able to see the chaos I make before it happens and stop it at times. This is a very big step for me.
So, I'm hanging on. I'm getting better. I might just be ok in the end. :-)
I feel better.
I feel pretty good actually. I'm still dealing with some pretty fucked up shit but all in all I'm feeling much better.
Things are better with my boyfriend, not fixed, but so much improved that it almost might as well be. He's more open, I'm more open...it's good.
I was concerned that therapy wasn't going to work for me, but it's actually been awesome in that it's taken me out of the hamster wheel I'd been stuck in, endlessly running in place and nothing ever changing, to a hamster wheel that can be nudged and moved to be able to see things from different angles and also to leave the rut I'd been in.
Prozac helps too. A lot.
Things are going fairly well at work. Not as much drama as there has been, for which I'm very glad.
I have 2 wonderful and silly kitties and an old dog that doesn't know he's old. Life's pretty good there, everyone is healthy at the moment.
In 2 days I will be having a procedure to permanently sterilize myself. In essence, I'm getting spayed. This is bringing me no end of joy and in 3 months when I have my radiograph to ensure 100% blockage I WILL be having a party to celebrate.
Most of all I'm glad that I'm not dealing with the magma chamber of rage every day. I'm calmer, more rational, more able to deal with the issues in my life that make me react the way I have been. I'm able to see the chaos I make before it happens and stop it at times. This is a very big step for me.
So, I'm hanging on. I'm getting better. I might just be ok in the end. :-)