May 18, 2005 19:24
well today was really relaxing..havent been to school all week, constant issues with the body.. its crazy.. but im makin it through. I read this thing on someones livejournal today, about suicide.. makes you really think twice.. ill leave it on here later. i really miss everyone at school.. havent seen my friends in awhile.. kinda sucks. but atleast im getting some alone time, catching up on stuff ive put off at home..and really getting inside myself.. ive realized alot the last few weeks... one thing, life is worth living..even if you dont feel alive..one day you will.. no matter whats happening, it shall pass.. and you will be relieved you lived through it. Im still waiting on my call from bootlegger..I guess I have a day or two more until i know i didnt get it. As far as i know, the interview went well..but hey, i have no experience..so maybe they hired someone who does. ill get a job soon. since ive been home, ive been getting over him alot. im scared to see him again, thinking the feelings will pour back in. i mean, hes amazing...but im sure their are other guys out there i could say the same about after finding them. im gonna stop thinking about him now, anyways.. i really need to get some new shorts for the summer.. looking through my drawers, i only found 2 or 3 pairs..and theyre gettin kinda old.. damnn.. im sure ive gained alot of weight since last year too..actually im positive i did. blah owell.. i guess you have to gain weight over the years. especially with whats goin on inside me, makin me gain alot of weight.. (im not pregnant) --but yah, tomorow i have a doctors appointment in the morning...then im pretty sure ill go to school. really need to get back, im gonna fail grade 10.. that will suck.