Comments | oneenemyleft: [ 4 ] video

oneenemyleft

[ 4 ] video

Jun 09, 2009 12:22

[See a petite girl sitting on a bed, holding a gun and a red scrap of cloth in her lap. She looks at the weapon thoughtfully, turning it over in her hands. She looks at the camera-or rather, the communicator, uncertainly. Then back down at the gun. She nods to herself and raises it to her head, closing her eyes and pulling the trigger ( Read more... )

when in doubt cling to s.e.e.s., video, voice, staying connected, nothing to see here just move along, the two things she can cook safely, she'll keep trying

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angelic_lawyer June 9 2009, 18:38:32 UTC

[...]

Are you okay?

oneenemyleft June 9 2009, 18:39:47 UTC

[Humiliated, but otherwise fine.]

I'm fine. I just wasn't thinking...

angelic_lawyer June 9 2009, 18:41:20 UTC

...I see.

oneenemyleft June 9 2009, 18:43:05 UTC

It-It wasn't a real gun. I wasn't... trying to hurt myself.

angelic_lawyer June 9 2009, 18:45:07 UTC

Ah. [...] That's a relief.

oneenemyleft June 9 2009, 18:45:53 UTC

I wasn't thinking... about how it would look. I'm sorry. I'm so used to it...

angelic_lawyer June 9 2009, 18:46:31 UTC

It's fine; as long as you're okay.

oneenemyleft June 9 2009, 18:46:56 UTC

Thank you.

I'm so sorry for worrying you.

angelic_lawyer June 9 2009, 18:48:16 UTC

It's quite alright. You don't need to apologise.

oneenemyleft June 9 2009, 18:49:34 UTC

No... I feel so-so stupid. I wasn't thinking.

I-you see, I thought, if it had worked, and something had gone wrong, then that might be dangerous. That's why I decided to record it. I wasn't thinking at all about what everyone else would think... I feel so stupid.

angelic_lawyer June 9 2009, 18:51:09 UTC

Sometimes, you need to think of yourself before others. As you said, if something had gone wrong, then no-one would have known what, exactly, had happened.

oneenemyleft June 9 2009, 18:54:12 UTC

But I wasn't thinking about what it would look like. I... I should have at least said something... or... and I knew it wouldn't work.

angelic_lawyer June 9 2009, 18:56:57 UTC

But it's happened now and there's nothing that can be done to change that. There's little point in 'I should have', 'I could have', 'if I...'. It's fine.

[...]

Is that so...? Clearly, you had some doubt.

oneenemyleft June 9 2009, 18:58:18 UTC

...

I knew it wouldn't work... deep down. I just hate being alone like this... and after speaking with Senpai last night, I was thinking about it even more...

angelic_lawyer June 9 2009, 19:02:37 UTC

I see. Regardless, having doubts as to whether something is absolute fact until it's proven to you isn't always a bad thing.

[...]

Alone?

oneenemyleft June 9 2009, 19:03:50 UTC

[...] I'm sorry. I'm not making much sense at all, am I?

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