because I'm bored
The Proust questionnaire that's going around.
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Being a child. Everything after that is just a chase to get it back, even for a fleeting moment. That could be why I hate children so intensely. I envy what they have.
What is your greatest fear?
Losing my grandmother. I hate waking up everyday, because if that's the day she goes, I don't want to be there for it. And it sounds melodramatic, but I don't think I can live without her. I don't want to live without her.
What historical figure do you most identify with?
That would mean I am something close to remarkable, and that I could never say about myself.
Which living person do you most admire?
My grandmother. Every trial that a human being could face, I think this woman has faced it and come through the other side. She's 4'11" and the strongest person I've ever had the privilege to know.
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
I'm a jealous soul with a quick temper. It's a caustic thing.
What trait do you most deplore in others?
Arrogance. It's the one thing I will not tolerate from anyone. You may think you're better than someone else, but I don't ever want to hear you say it, and if you treat someone else like shit and look down your nose at them, then you are the scum of the earth. How can we ever know anyone else's story, know their life and their struggles? I think that humility and empathy are the greatest attributes a person can have.
What is your greatest extravagance?
I have a lot of shit I don't need. A lot of shit I don't need.
On what occasion do you lie?
It's a bit too easy for me sometimes. You find that people require it more than the truth, and you give them what they desire. But down the line, you realize that because of this, some people don't know who you are at all, and it's your fault.
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
My teeth are crooked. It's always bothered me. I should've gotten braces as a child, but I never did out of fear of being teased. I'm going to get Invisalign this summer and start fixing the issue. I feel like this one thing holds me back a great deal, which is kind of stupid, the more I think about it.
What is your favorite journey?
Connecting with people, and sharing experiences with them over time. There's nothing like sitting with a great friend and looking back on all the time and the struggling you did together.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Chastity, for obvious reasons. The rest pertain more to the character of the heart, and are more important, in my opinion.
Which living person do you most despise?
Miley Cyrus. What a waste of space.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
I overuse a lot of shit. I'm on the internet entirely too much.
What is your greatest regret?
I often regret not calling my mother out on all of her broken promises. From a very young age, I had to learn that it was almost her job to leave me hanging. One day, I might pluck up the courage to let her know how much that's hurt me over the years.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My newest cousin Emma Jane. I never thought I could love something like that. Never. And I generally hate children.
When and where were you happiest?
When I was a child. When kids still played outside every day, all day. When my world didn't extend past, "wow, this is fun!" When all of my family was still here, when we all seemed to love each other. Before I saw the world and life for what they truly are.
Which talent would you most like to have?
I'd love to play the guitar really well. I know that you can learn it, but it takes something extra to be great at it.
What is your current state of mind?
Chaos mixed with excitement.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I'd like to be less cynical about things, about people. Years of sitting quietly and watching how people destroy each other and ruin things out of spite has jaded me so immensely, I daresay the damage might be irreversible. But then, lately, two people have come into my life and imbued my spirit with hope. And yet, all I still think in the back of my mind is that this is just setting me up for my biggest fall yet. The biggest heartbreak yet.
If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
I wish they were here, and not so far away. And I wish we weren't happier fighting, because we have such beautiful moments of togetherness and love. Few and far between, of course, but respite amid all the bickering and tension.
If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what would it be?
It's funny that I'm seeing this now, because I asked a bunch of people this question the other day. I'm still very torn between a giraffe and the second coming of Marlon Brando.
What do your consider your greatest achievement?
Graduating from high school. I know that's pathetic, but I have no idea how I managed that. I scarcely doubt I'm going to ever graduate from college at this point.
What is your most treasured possession?
My dog, Kitty. She's a runt from a standard Chihuahua litter. She should be big and fat and ugly, but she's tiny, carved out of stone, and gorgeous. A freak of nature and perfect specimen. She's perfect for me: completely out of fucking control. It's what I deserve in a dog.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Losing a loved one. The hole can never be filled.
What is your most marked characteristic?
Sarcasm. Sometimes, even I don't know if I'm serious. It's something everyone in my life has to adjust to. My voice doesn't help, either. It drips with the sarcasm stain, even if I'm being sincere.
What is the quality you most like in a man?
Humility. A man is only a real man if they acknowledge and accept that they don't know it all, and that they aren't God's gift to the world.
What is the quality you most admire in a woman?
Strength. I say "women are stupid" a very lot, and I truly believe it about most of the female population. It's not their fault usually. They're a product of their environment. But a woman who is her own person, who's strong in her convictions, and who doesn't have to depend on anyone to get by? That's a woman we can all respect and admire.
What do you most value in your friends?
I only ask that they be true to themselves; with that comes the rest. If you have to be someone different depending on the group you're in at any given moment, then you probably aren't an honest or loyal person to begin with. Just be yourself. Always.
Who are your favourite writers?
I'm not really an avid reader, unfortunately, but I have a fondness for poets. Whitman, Poe, Frost, Dickinson, Shel Silverstein, etc. They all connect with a more raw human experience...at least to me.
Who is your favourite hero of fiction?
This is retarded, but Ferris Bueller. I aspire to be that effortless. That smooth.
Who are your heroes in real life?
My grandmother.
What are your favourite names?
Harper, Grant, Jude, Everett
What is it that you most dislike?
That anyone has to suffer.
How would you like to die?
I'd love it if a piano fell out of the sky and onto my head while I was walking, but I think that's hoping too high. Something fast.
What is your motto?
I have two, really. One is "do what you love". And the other thing that I hope for people is that they just stop every now and then, sit outside, and watch the world go by. No talking, no distractions, just looking at everything around them. It's those quiet, still moments that I cherish the most. It's good to be alive, and it's good to have who and what we have. Things can get in the way of being truly in love with The Moment, 'cause it can be all over in a split second.
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Being a child. Everything after that is just a chase to get it back, even for a fleeting moment. That could be why I hate children so intensely. I envy what they have.
What is your greatest fear?
Losing my grandmother. I hate waking up everyday, because if that's the day she goes, I don't want to be there for it. And it sounds melodramatic, but I don't think I can live without her. I don't want to live without her.
What historical figure do you most identify with?
That would mean I am something close to remarkable, and that I could never say about myself.
Which living person do you most admire?
My grandmother. Every trial that a human being could face, I think this woman has faced it and come through the other side. She's 4'11" and the strongest person I've ever had the privilege to know.
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
I'm a jealous soul with a quick temper. It's a caustic thing.
What trait do you most deplore in others?
Arrogance. It's the one thing I will not tolerate from anyone. You may think you're better than someone else, but I don't ever want to hear you say it, and if you treat someone else like shit and look down your nose at them, then you are the scum of the earth. How can we ever know anyone else's story, know their life and their struggles? I think that humility and empathy are the greatest attributes a person can have.
What is your greatest extravagance?
I have a lot of shit I don't need. A lot of shit I don't need.
On what occasion do you lie?
It's a bit too easy for me sometimes. You find that people require it more than the truth, and you give them what they desire. But down the line, you realize that because of this, some people don't know who you are at all, and it's your fault.
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
My teeth are crooked. It's always bothered me. I should've gotten braces as a child, but I never did out of fear of being teased. I'm going to get Invisalign this summer and start fixing the issue. I feel like this one thing holds me back a great deal, which is kind of stupid, the more I think about it.
What is your favorite journey?
Connecting with people, and sharing experiences with them over time. There's nothing like sitting with a great friend and looking back on all the time and the struggling you did together.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Chastity, for obvious reasons. The rest pertain more to the character of the heart, and are more important, in my opinion.
Which living person do you most despise?
Miley Cyrus. What a waste of space.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
I overuse a lot of shit. I'm on the internet entirely too much.
What is your greatest regret?
I often regret not calling my mother out on all of her broken promises. From a very young age, I had to learn that it was almost her job to leave me hanging. One day, I might pluck up the courage to let her know how much that's hurt me over the years.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My newest cousin Emma Jane. I never thought I could love something like that. Never. And I generally hate children.
When and where were you happiest?
When I was a child. When kids still played outside every day, all day. When my world didn't extend past, "wow, this is fun!" When all of my family was still here, when we all seemed to love each other. Before I saw the world and life for what they truly are.
Which talent would you most like to have?
I'd love to play the guitar really well. I know that you can learn it, but it takes something extra to be great at it.
What is your current state of mind?
Chaos mixed with excitement.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I'd like to be less cynical about things, about people. Years of sitting quietly and watching how people destroy each other and ruin things out of spite has jaded me so immensely, I daresay the damage might be irreversible. But then, lately, two people have come into my life and imbued my spirit with hope. And yet, all I still think in the back of my mind is that this is just setting me up for my biggest fall yet. The biggest heartbreak yet.
If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
I wish they were here, and not so far away. And I wish we weren't happier fighting, because we have such beautiful moments of togetherness and love. Few and far between, of course, but respite amid all the bickering and tension.
If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what would it be?
It's funny that I'm seeing this now, because I asked a bunch of people this question the other day. I'm still very torn between a giraffe and the second coming of Marlon Brando.
What do your consider your greatest achievement?
Graduating from high school. I know that's pathetic, but I have no idea how I managed that. I scarcely doubt I'm going to ever graduate from college at this point.
What is your most treasured possession?
My dog, Kitty. She's a runt from a standard Chihuahua litter. She should be big and fat and ugly, but she's tiny, carved out of stone, and gorgeous. A freak of nature and perfect specimen. She's perfect for me: completely out of fucking control. It's what I deserve in a dog.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Losing a loved one. The hole can never be filled.
What is your most marked characteristic?
Sarcasm. Sometimes, even I don't know if I'm serious. It's something everyone in my life has to adjust to. My voice doesn't help, either. It drips with the sarcasm stain, even if I'm being sincere.
What is the quality you most like in a man?
Humility. A man is only a real man if they acknowledge and accept that they don't know it all, and that they aren't God's gift to the world.
What is the quality you most admire in a woman?
Strength. I say "women are stupid" a very lot, and I truly believe it about most of the female population. It's not their fault usually. They're a product of their environment. But a woman who is her own person, who's strong in her convictions, and who doesn't have to depend on anyone to get by? That's a woman we can all respect and admire.
What do you most value in your friends?
I only ask that they be true to themselves; with that comes the rest. If you have to be someone different depending on the group you're in at any given moment, then you probably aren't an honest or loyal person to begin with. Just be yourself. Always.
Who are your favourite writers?
I'm not really an avid reader, unfortunately, but I have a fondness for poets. Whitman, Poe, Frost, Dickinson, Shel Silverstein, etc. They all connect with a more raw human experience...at least to me.
Who is your favourite hero of fiction?
This is retarded, but Ferris Bueller. I aspire to be that effortless. That smooth.
Who are your heroes in real life?
My grandmother.
What are your favourite names?
Harper, Grant, Jude, Everett
What is it that you most dislike?
That anyone has to suffer.
How would you like to die?
I'd love it if a piano fell out of the sky and onto my head while I was walking, but I think that's hoping too high. Something fast.
What is your motto?
I have two, really. One is "do what you love". And the other thing that I hope for people is that they just stop every now and then, sit outside, and watch the world go by. No talking, no distractions, just looking at everything around them. It's those quiet, still moments that I cherish the most. It's good to be alive, and it's good to have who and what we have. Things can get in the way of being truly in love with The Moment, 'cause it can be all over in a split second.