fuck man.

[onedayundone]

sometimes things happen that just make you rethink everything. I don't know if I've made the right choices. I just know I want to be there to help you through this, but I can't. I can't be there. I don't feel like I'm here. I don't know where I am. I just want it all to stop. I want to know everything is right. I want to know that I'm not fucking up the rest of my life. There is what is safe. There is what is tangible. There is uncertainty and a whole lot of chaos. There isn't a therapist there telling me what to do anymore. I'm glad I don't freak out when I hear the word suicide. I am happy I have that. I can just hear it, and deal with it.

Man, how do I make everything okay? Am I making good choices, or do I have my head up my ass? If I have my head up my ass, how am I going to see where I'm going? When I pull it out will I have nostrils filled with shit?

BAH!