Best friends means
I've been thinking a lot lately. When a relationship ends on terms of being "just friends" it sounds like it can work at the time, but in reality it can't. I can't even pretend that I want to be friends with you anymore. I hate the idea of you. You've changed so much that it blows my mind. I told my parents about the person you've become and they were visibly upset, they really liked you. Fuck, I loved you. Last time we hung out (ACTUALLY hung out) you told me you still loved me, but not in the way that you used to. I don't know how you can even say that, the last time I talked to you was after a class. You've since stopped going to school altogether, and that isn't like you. What happened to the girl I knew? You wanted to transfer to Berkeley, and you were on track to do so. Now you don't even go to school. Most of all, I miss who you used to be. Remember all those friends you had? Do you even talk to them anymore? It's sad really, I've thought about what it'd be like to be with you again, and I really would've if you hadn't changed. I can't believe you're still with a guy that has cheated on you, not once, but TWICE. You told me he makes you happy. How so? You've told your friends that he doesn't make you happy, but you're just afraid to be alone. That makes me sick to my stomach. You know for a fucking fact (you've told me) that I would never have done this shit to you. It's been about 4 months since we broke up, and when you told me we'd still be friends and hang out, I believed you. In those 4 months how many times have we hung out? Twice, we saw the Dark Knight together, and we went out with some friends to Berkeley. Both times we had awesome conversations and it made me happy that we could still talk that way. What happened? Are you too caught up in your other life, hanging out with the new boyfriend and all of his friends? What's funny is you met him through the job that I helped you get. If I wouldn't have talked to Julie about you needing a job, you would have never found that place. I hope one day you realize what you've done to yourself and the people that were there for you. The thing is, I could easily just text you and tell you all of this, but I want you to take the initiative to continue our friendship. The thing is, you never knew I had an LJ, and you probably will never read this.