(no subject)
...yare-yare. Since everyone's been ever so beastly about these wretched all Gentleman's and Lady's and whatnot Codes, I naturally simply had to present you with the one etiquette that we all secretly adhere to ~ ♥
~♥~ Evil Overlord's Code of Manners ~♥~
♥ ~ repeat your sinister and lordly pseudonym, heartfelt grudge story and death threat twice when leaving a voice mail message. Pay especial mind to time your dramatic sobs every five seconds after the despairing screams in your background.
♥ ~ RSVP mostly stands for Ruin, Shatter, Violate and Pulverize. Kindly remember to send all yours back in response to all formal occasions, since all your enemies will be present and gathered under the same roof.
♥ ~ never drink, infuse or whore more than you can deny the following day as part of your standard angst trip.
♥ ~ no arsenic or cantarella before the hours eight of the evening. All lighter poisons are permitted, provided the victim has the courtesy to choke a lung out quietly and in a private room.
♥ ~ dote on your torture victims as you would on a lover: empty their wallets, crush their hearts, make them moan for you, and give them an ecstatic death.
♥ ~ never make an individual feel left out at one of your parties - kill everyone there.
♥ ~ always remember to send a thank-you note or card within two weeks of receiving a gift. An elegant set of intestines, organs or appendages of your choice accompanying your missive is always appreciated.
♥ ~ a gentlemen always removes his predictable, visible, or otherwise impaired weaponry when entering a home, restaurant, theater or church. He must of course make haste during his assassination attempts in between encores and Ave Marias so as not to disturb an audience.
♥ ~ before playing a sport or a game, praise the other players on their ability and let them know that you enjoy playing with them by cheating your black little heart out every step of the way. Remember, antagonizing says you CARE.
♥ ~ children are sometimes best whipped, not heard.
♥ ~ perfume, cologne or aftershave should be embraced sparingly; the distinctive scent of blood, gore and sulfuric acid is however best applied at your discretion.
♥ ~ adequately sort and assign differentiating colours to the envelopes catering to your letters, according to their topic: Idle Threats, Meaningful Threats, World Domination Plans, Holy Inquisition Bills.
...naturally, that is hardly the whole of it, but I do believe a beginning shall suffice, ne, Ladies...? Gentlemen...?
[ ooc : ...long live the crack...? -__-; ]
~♥~ Evil Overlord's Code of Manners ~♥~
♥ ~ repeat your sinister and lordly pseudonym, heartfelt grudge story and death threat twice when leaving a voice mail message. Pay especial mind to time your dramatic sobs every five seconds after the despairing screams in your background.
♥ ~ RSVP mostly stands for Ruin, Shatter, Violate and Pulverize. Kindly remember to send all yours back in response to all formal occasions, since all your enemies will be present and gathered under the same roof.
♥ ~ never drink, infuse or whore more than you can deny the following day as part of your standard angst trip.
♥ ~ no arsenic or cantarella before the hours eight of the evening. All lighter poisons are permitted, provided the victim has the courtesy to choke a lung out quietly and in a private room.
♥ ~ dote on your torture victims as you would on a lover: empty their wallets, crush their hearts, make them moan for you, and give them an ecstatic death.
♥ ~ never make an individual feel left out at one of your parties - kill everyone there.
♥ ~ always remember to send a thank-you note or card within two weeks of receiving a gift. An elegant set of intestines, organs or appendages of your choice accompanying your missive is always appreciated.
♥ ~ a gentlemen always removes his predictable, visible, or otherwise impaired weaponry when entering a home, restaurant, theater or church. He must of course make haste during his assassination attempts in between encores and Ave Marias so as not to disturb an audience.
♥ ~ before playing a sport or a game, praise the other players on their ability and let them know that you enjoy playing with them by cheating your black little heart out every step of the way. Remember, antagonizing says you CARE.
♥ ~ children are sometimes best whipped, not heard.
♥ ~ perfume, cologne or aftershave should be embraced sparingly; the distinctive scent of blood, gore and sulfuric acid is however best applied at your discretion.
♥ ~ adequately sort and assign differentiating colours to the envelopes catering to your letters, according to their topic: Idle Threats, Meaningful Threats, World Domination Plans, Holy Inquisition Bills.
...naturally, that is hardly the whole of it, but I do believe a beginning shall suffice, ne, Ladies...? Gentlemen...?
[ ooc : ...long live the crack...? -__-; ]