None of us can choose our destiny, Merlin.. and none of us can escape it.Words that he'd been told so long ago, and they were words he lived by, more or less. Of course, the Great Dragon had meant Arthur, and would likely laugh himself silly upon hearing that he is about to announce an altogether different kind of destiny today
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He looks up when Merlin enters the room.
"To what do I owe this honour," he grins at his friend, hoping to put him at ease. Merlin's been less than forward since losing his powers and Arthur doesn't want him going anywhere.
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"I have some news, Arthur." There are a few people milling about the throne room, none of them give strange looks to Merlin, which just indicates that talk of his loss of power has not spread yet.
"Morgana has said yes to my offer." Which is not an official announcement, but it will certainly have the court saying something, and Merlin would rather the focus be that and not his lack of magic.
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Then his eyes widen...practically boggle out of their sockets in fact!
He almost drops the papers as he jumps to feet and hurries down to take Merlin by the sleeve, pulling him off into a nearby antechamber.
"Your prospal, you mean? She's going to marry you?"
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"Yes, that one. You seem almost insultingly surprised by this." But he is not offended. Merlin is actually very relieved to talk with his friend about this.
"She has agreed, and we've already discussed it with Carys and Tarrwyn."
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"It's just...does she even like you?" Arthur doesn't mean to be harsh about it, but...well he doesn't know how else to say it. "You tried to kill her! She tried to kill you! How is this even supposed to work?"
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Merlin thinks that it is probably high time that he confesses all of the goings on between himself and the King's sister. Well, not in detail, of course, but in the general sense of things.
"Morgana and I have been, er, well, lovers since I was a manservant. Obviously not when she was plotting to overthrow the kingdom or when she was in exile, but before that. We were in love once, and I hope that we can find that again."
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A very long, long silence.
"You...what?"
Merlin has broken his brain.
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In fact, Merlin considers it a good time to go pour himself a goblet of water.
"I used to dream of marrying her." He does not mean in the prophetic sense, simply in the idealistic way that any young person would. "When I became someone important enough to earn her hand. Well.. now I guess I just cannot imagine anyone else would fit in that dream."
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"You - she...without any chance..." Arthur's voice has gone quite high. "The - my - you would have been KILLED!"
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"Without that time, I would not have suggested such a marriage now."
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"How could you do that to her?!" If Merlin has any fear, he'd probably back away a bit now. "If you truly loved -! Don't you think I dreamed of claiming Guinevere as my own long before we wed? Do you think that was easy for me?! For her? And there's you! Just recklessly..." He waves his hands about as words fail him.
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"The decisions that you and Gwen made may have been honorable, and right.. for you. However what Morgana and I offered to each other was freely given, and I have no reason to regret that it took place. You insult both of us by making this a question of her purity alone."
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He's going to start pacing. "That's not it at all, there's...outside factors you should have considered. What if Morgana had become pregnant? It may noy have been fair or right, but what she would have suffered. And you wouldn't have been able to help at all."
Have a nice glare, Merlin.
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"We would have left together." Which is probably the first time that Merlin has ever confessed to having thoughts of leaving Camelot independently. "Given the fact that we were both remarkably capable people, even at that age, I imagine we would have been fine."
Of course, the history of Camelot would have been absurdly different.
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"Father would have stopped at nothing to find her. He'd have torn the world apart."
He flops back down in his chair and rubs his forehead. Obviously, that didn't happen.
But something else still did. "She must have trusted you implicitly. Why didn't you tell her what the Dragon said? Why did you just poison her?"
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