my brother's leaving

[on_your_porch22]

so yeah . my brother was here for like maybe two weeks.. it almost seemed normal again, like old times. It really never seemed like he had ever gone anywhere. today i totally realized.. hes leaving, and he wont be back for a long, long time this time. he was supposed to leave at 12:30 in the afternoon today but his flight got cancelled.(his new flight is tomorrow morning at 7:00am) i was walking out the door completely forgetting he was leaving and almost gone when my mom chased me out the door telling me this would be the last chance id see him in a while.. since he has already gone through basic training now he wont be visiting all too much. its so sad.. i almost started crying while i was walking over to him and on the way to school. is that dumb? i know ill see him again.. and when he was here, i took it for granted that hed always be here...but now that hes not going to be, thigns are totally different. i mean, who can i horse play with and run around the house screaming with ? who can drive me around blasting hardcore music? lol. i guess its the most simple things that you remember the most. yeah, he did tell me to not ruin my school years by wasting them away.. and yes he told me i had great potential.. but yeah i guess those things let me know how much he really cares about me, but its really the simple things that i'll miss the most. ill miss him chasing me around.. taking me places.. calling me names.. talking about some gay show we watch on discovery channel together. lol. and as any other siblings, ill even miss the fighting. but thats okay, because now im realizing that god has a way bigger plan for my brother and im excited for him. yes, i am scared too, because germany than iraq and than who knows where (?) makes someone scared.. this is probably going to be the most life changing expiriences for him and of course im encouraging him 100% (although i wasnt too set on the whole iraq deal but its fine).
but .. im going to miss you caleb.. and this time you wont be back soo soon

<3

im too tired to write anything else
and school's tomorrow . i wish break lasted just a litttle bit longer.