FIC: When Spies have Family Outings [Gundam Wing, Dorothy & Middie & Mariemeia & Trowa]
Title: When Spies have Family Outings
Author: Omnicat v''v
Rating: T / PG-13
Genre: Humor
Spoilers & Desirable Foreknowledge: The series proper and Episode Zero.
Warnings: Bisexuality. Talking about sex. Spelling Preventors with an ‘o’.
Pairings: Hints of established Trowa Barton x Quatre Winner, past Trowa Barton x Middie Une and current Middie Une x Catherine Bloom in its early stages.
Disclaimer: Me no claim, you no sue. That okay?
Summary: Trowa frowned. “It wouldn’t have bothered me so much if the past hadn’t decided to come haunt me physically.” “Oh, poor Uncle.” Mariemeia intoned sarcastically. “Woe. Are you done yet?”
Author’s Note: This is relaxing. One of these babies and I feel right up to tackling serious stuff again. Whoo!
When Spies have Family Outings
“I know she’s Lady’s cousin, but I don’t want you to get too friendly with her. You were my niece first.”
“Can I go up yet?”
“Mei...” Trowa sighed.
“Trowa...” Mariemeia mimicked.
There was a brief staring contest, which Mariemeia lost. “I know, I know. It’s a very tragic story and I’m sure it would be a hit in the theatres. But there comes a time when you have to leave the past behind you and stop letting it bug you.” she said mock-sagely. “You don’t see me moping about not being ruler of the world, do you?”
“You’re not? I could have sworn...”
“Less talking and more working.” Mariemeia bopped him over the head playfully as he kneeled before her, tugging at another strap on the harnass.
Trowa frowned. “It wouldn’t have bothered me so much if the past hadn’t decided to come haunt me physically.”
“Oh, poor Uncle.” Mariemeia intoned sarcastically. “Woe. Are you done yet?”
He checked the fastenings one more time. “Watch your mouth or I might just let you fall.”
“Whatever. Now lemme at that tightrope!”
It did not take long for Middie to decide that she and Dorothy Catalonia, her cousin’s adopted daughter’s favourite cousin, did not get along. It took only slightly longer to realise that Dorothy did not care and did, in fact, enjoy riling her up. And that she was rather good at it. By the time Dorothy managed to steer the conversation they had while strolling around the circus grounds to her love life, Middie’s most prominent thought was that she must get a kick out of cruel and unusual punishment.
“Have you considered a threesome?”
“Say what?”
“A threesome. Having sex with two other people at once. Or a relationship with two other people at once, but I personally much prefer for those to be restricted to the facilitation of sex.”
“I did not want to know that. And are you kidding? They’re brother and sister, that would be incest!”
“Oh no, not with Catherine. It’s no fun if you’re not the only woman in the threeway, anyhow. I mean you, Trowa and Quatre.”
“You’re crazy.”
“That’s what they all say, my dear. But then they try it and somehow miraculously change their minds.”
“Oh - whatever! No, just no. It wouldn’t solve things anyway.”
“Well, there’s no rule saying you have to stop at three. Make it your own private swinger’s club. Trowa and Catherine wouldn’t have to lay a finger on each other.”
“Crazy doesn’t even begin to cover it, does it?”
“So easily offended. Pity. Your dear cousin’s never had such problems.”
“Oh no, I am not listening to this. I am not that close to Lady, and I never want to be.”
“Sigh. I miss the days when everyone still had more interesting buttons to push. When man’s folly had more far-reaching consequences than awkward workfloor relations or an empty pocket. Miss Relena and Mister Quatre are far too busy these days, and Lady Une never did have a sense of humor. I’m going to dry up and wither, at this rate. Maybe I should quit business - transport was never as interesting as weaponry, anyway. Go into politics instead. Or theatre.”
Dorothy’s expression suddenly turned disturbingly sly. “Though come to think of it...” she purred. “So you’re a former spy, aren’t you Middie?”
“Don’t. Even. Go there.” Middie ground out through gritted teeth.
Dorothy, of course, was going to go there. But Middie was saved by the timely arrival of Trowa and a skipping Mariemeia.
“At each other’s throats already?” the girl asked cheerfully.
“Why am I not surprised?” Trowa said.
“You stay out of it!” Middie snapped, while Dorothy almost cooed: “Oh no, we’re really hitting it off now, aren’t we Middie?”
“And you shut up!” Middie went on. She demonstratively turned to Mariemeia. “Did you have fun back there?”
“It was great! I hardly ever fell at all.” she said proudly, and then cocked her head and adopted an expression eerily similar to Dorothy’s earlier one. “What were you talking about?”
“Nothing that would concern a young lady like yourself.”
“Sex.” Dorothy answered casually.
“Dorothy!” Middie exclaimed. “She’s twelve!”
“Indeed, going to hit puberty soon. Just the right age to start educating her. No point in keeping her in the dark about the birds and the bees when she’s already so well acquainted with other adult affairs.”
“Lady is going to kill you when she finds out.” Middie deadpanned. She had half a mind to make it happen.
Mariemeia made a face. “Une doesn’t mind if I know about such things. She has me guarded well enough that I won’t be able to do anything with my knowledge.”
“We all have to make our sacrifices.” Dorothy stroked Mariemeia’s hair with something that could pass for reverence. “When the time is right, I’ll take you out into the field and show you the finest the world of adults has to offer. Patience, little one. One day.” She heaved a passionate sigh, pressed a hand to her chest, and abruptly turned to Trowa and Middie, all smirk and twinkling eyes again.
“Not that I am at all opposed to combining the two, but I’ve come to rather resent my aristocratic upbringing for teaching me all about war but nothing about sex. The indignation of having to be submissive to your inferiors in the bedroom while you learn! I’m not letting the same happen to Mister Treize’s only daughter.”
Middie, whose thoughts had began to run along the almost appreciative lines of ‘now here’s a woman who knows how to entertain herself’, came to an abrupt and unpleasant halt. Trashy magazines were one thing, but there were some people she really did not want to think about that way. “There you go again! Too much information. Does that phrase mean nothing to you?”
Trowa smirked. “Dorothy’s just bored. You should see her when she’s actually got something to work with.”
“Such sweet words, Trowa. And here I thought you were trying for monogamy out of respect for dear Quatre.”
Middie facepalmed.
Dorothy laughed. “If you’re going to be a part of this family you’ll see a whole lot worse.”
“My side of the family was raised with a little sense of propriety.” Middie growled from behind her hand, a hot blush creeping up her neck.
“Too bad Mariemeia’s adoption brought me and mine in, then, isn’t it?” Dorothy purred, and suddenly Middie began to suffer from proximity anxiety. “And Cathy is no paragon of modesty either.”
“Cathy and I are in no way, shape or form related to each other.” Middie protested. “We’re dating - almost dating. That’s different.”
“On the contrary, dear. Didn’t you know that Trowa has been Mariemeia’s uncle for years now?”
“What?”
“Now you’re pushing it, Dorothy.”
Mariemeia sighed and headed off to the lion cages. “Grown-ups are so silly.”
PSAN: *sings off-key and skips off into the sunset*
Spies Of Our Lives
Middie Une shows up out of nowhere and enlists with the Preventers. Paranoia ensues. Or it would, if Trowa had any say in it.
When Spies meet Howard’s Hawaiian, and Its Namesake
When Spies have Job Interviews
When Spies meet their Karmic Twins
When Spies have Boring Assignments
When Spies meet Wise Old Masters
When Spies have Interesting Assignments
When Spies meet No-One. In Fact, This Never Happened
When Spies have Days Off
When Spies meet the No-Nonsense, Unimpressed Truth
When Spies have Family Outings
When Spies meet Relatives for Rent
When Spies have Utterly Bizarre Assignments
When Spies meet the Undead Doctor
When Spies have No Good, Very Bad Days
When Spies meet the Ghost of Love Disasters Past
When Spies have Reconciliation, Finally!
When Spies meet Their Ever After
Author: Omnicat v''v
Rating: T / PG-13
Genre: Humor
Spoilers & Desirable Foreknowledge: The series proper and Episode Zero.
Warnings: Bisexuality. Talking about sex. Spelling Preventors with an ‘o’.
Pairings: Hints of established Trowa Barton x Quatre Winner, past Trowa Barton x Middie Une and current Middie Une x Catherine Bloom in its early stages.
Disclaimer: Me no claim, you no sue. That okay?
Summary: Trowa frowned. “It wouldn’t have bothered me so much if the past hadn’t decided to come haunt me physically.” “Oh, poor Uncle.” Mariemeia intoned sarcastically. “Woe. Are you done yet?”
Author’s Note: This is relaxing. One of these babies and I feel right up to tackling serious stuff again. Whoo!
When Spies have Family Outings
“I know she’s Lady’s cousin, but I don’t want you to get too friendly with her. You were my niece first.”
“Can I go up yet?”
“Mei...” Trowa sighed.
“Trowa...” Mariemeia mimicked.
There was a brief staring contest, which Mariemeia lost. “I know, I know. It’s a very tragic story and I’m sure it would be a hit in the theatres. But there comes a time when you have to leave the past behind you and stop letting it bug you.” she said mock-sagely. “You don’t see me moping about not being ruler of the world, do you?”
“You’re not? I could have sworn...”
“Less talking and more working.” Mariemeia bopped him over the head playfully as he kneeled before her, tugging at another strap on the harnass.
Trowa frowned. “It wouldn’t have bothered me so much if the past hadn’t decided to come haunt me physically.”
“Oh, poor Uncle.” Mariemeia intoned sarcastically. “Woe. Are you done yet?”
He checked the fastenings one more time. “Watch your mouth or I might just let you fall.”
“Whatever. Now lemme at that tightrope!”
It did not take long for Middie to decide that she and Dorothy Catalonia, her cousin’s adopted daughter’s favourite cousin, did not get along. It took only slightly longer to realise that Dorothy did not care and did, in fact, enjoy riling her up. And that she was rather good at it. By the time Dorothy managed to steer the conversation they had while strolling around the circus grounds to her love life, Middie’s most prominent thought was that she must get a kick out of cruel and unusual punishment.
“Have you considered a threesome?”
“Say what?”
“A threesome. Having sex with two other people at once. Or a relationship with two other people at once, but I personally much prefer for those to be restricted to the facilitation of sex.”
“I did not want to know that. And are you kidding? They’re brother and sister, that would be incest!”
“Oh no, not with Catherine. It’s no fun if you’re not the only woman in the threeway, anyhow. I mean you, Trowa and Quatre.”
“You’re crazy.”
“That’s what they all say, my dear. But then they try it and somehow miraculously change their minds.”
“Oh - whatever! No, just no. It wouldn’t solve things anyway.”
“Well, there’s no rule saying you have to stop at three. Make it your own private swinger’s club. Trowa and Catherine wouldn’t have to lay a finger on each other.”
“Crazy doesn’t even begin to cover it, does it?”
“So easily offended. Pity. Your dear cousin’s never had such problems.”
“Oh no, I am not listening to this. I am not that close to Lady, and I never want to be.”
“Sigh. I miss the days when everyone still had more interesting buttons to push. When man’s folly had more far-reaching consequences than awkward workfloor relations or an empty pocket. Miss Relena and Mister Quatre are far too busy these days, and Lady Une never did have a sense of humor. I’m going to dry up and wither, at this rate. Maybe I should quit business - transport was never as interesting as weaponry, anyway. Go into politics instead. Or theatre.”
Dorothy’s expression suddenly turned disturbingly sly. “Though come to think of it...” she purred. “So you’re a former spy, aren’t you Middie?”
“Don’t. Even. Go there.” Middie ground out through gritted teeth.
Dorothy, of course, was going to go there. But Middie was saved by the timely arrival of Trowa and a skipping Mariemeia.
“At each other’s throats already?” the girl asked cheerfully.
“Why am I not surprised?” Trowa said.
“You stay out of it!” Middie snapped, while Dorothy almost cooed: “Oh no, we’re really hitting it off now, aren’t we Middie?”
“And you shut up!” Middie went on. She demonstratively turned to Mariemeia. “Did you have fun back there?”
“It was great! I hardly ever fell at all.” she said proudly, and then cocked her head and adopted an expression eerily similar to Dorothy’s earlier one. “What were you talking about?”
“Nothing that would concern a young lady like yourself.”
“Sex.” Dorothy answered casually.
“Dorothy!” Middie exclaimed. “She’s twelve!”
“Indeed, going to hit puberty soon. Just the right age to start educating her. No point in keeping her in the dark about the birds and the bees when she’s already so well acquainted with other adult affairs.”
“Lady is going to kill you when she finds out.” Middie deadpanned. She had half a mind to make it happen.
Mariemeia made a face. “Une doesn’t mind if I know about such things. She has me guarded well enough that I won’t be able to do anything with my knowledge.”
“We all have to make our sacrifices.” Dorothy stroked Mariemeia’s hair with something that could pass for reverence. “When the time is right, I’ll take you out into the field and show you the finest the world of adults has to offer. Patience, little one. One day.” She heaved a passionate sigh, pressed a hand to her chest, and abruptly turned to Trowa and Middie, all smirk and twinkling eyes again.
“Not that I am at all opposed to combining the two, but I’ve come to rather resent my aristocratic upbringing for teaching me all about war but nothing about sex. The indignation of having to be submissive to your inferiors in the bedroom while you learn! I’m not letting the same happen to Mister Treize’s only daughter.”
Middie, whose thoughts had began to run along the almost appreciative lines of ‘now here’s a woman who knows how to entertain herself’, came to an abrupt and unpleasant halt. Trashy magazines were one thing, but there were some people she really did not want to think about that way. “There you go again! Too much information. Does that phrase mean nothing to you?”
Trowa smirked. “Dorothy’s just bored. You should see her when she’s actually got something to work with.”
“Such sweet words, Trowa. And here I thought you were trying for monogamy out of respect for dear Quatre.”
Middie facepalmed.
Dorothy laughed. “If you’re going to be a part of this family you’ll see a whole lot worse.”
“My side of the family was raised with a little sense of propriety.” Middie growled from behind her hand, a hot blush creeping up her neck.
“Too bad Mariemeia’s adoption brought me and mine in, then, isn’t it?” Dorothy purred, and suddenly Middie began to suffer from proximity anxiety. “And Cathy is no paragon of modesty either.”
“Cathy and I are in no way, shape or form related to each other.” Middie protested. “We’re dating - almost dating. That’s different.”
“On the contrary, dear. Didn’t you know that Trowa has been Mariemeia’s uncle for years now?”
“What?”
“Now you’re pushing it, Dorothy.”
Mariemeia sighed and headed off to the lion cages. “Grown-ups are so silly.”
PSAN: *sings off-key and skips off into the sunset*
Spies Of Our Lives
Middie Une shows up out of nowhere and enlists with the Preventers. Paranoia ensues. Or it would, if Trowa had any say in it.
When Spies meet Howard’s Hawaiian, and Its Namesake
When Spies have Job Interviews
When Spies meet their Karmic Twins
When Spies have Boring Assignments
When Spies meet Wise Old Masters
When Spies have Interesting Assignments
When Spies meet No-One. In Fact, This Never Happened
When Spies have Days Off
When Spies meet the No-Nonsense, Unimpressed Truth
When Spies have Family Outings
When Spies meet Relatives for Rent
When Spies have Utterly Bizarre Assignments
When Spies meet the Undead Doctor
When Spies have No Good, Very Bad Days
When Spies meet the Ghost of Love Disasters Past
When Spies have Reconciliation, Finally!
When Spies meet Their Ever After