Prompt Response: Talk about your first time.
Brittany: I lied to him.
Josh: You did what?
Brittany: I told him you'd asked me to marry you. I thought it might force him to get over me. Or at least to make up his mind. That was how I ended up going down to see him. That was why it happened.
Josh: Good idea, but not well executed. [pauses] Just out of curiosity, then, if I did ask you to marry me, what would you say?
The first time I slept with my fiancee was the same day I laid out her ex-boyfriend for hurting her. More accurately, for sleeping with her the night before, and then ditching her in some hotel in Princeton, New Jersey.
I remember her slipping into bed at something like six in the morning and trying to pry her pillow away from me. Blearily, I looked over at her and smiled before I finally surrendered it. She snatched it back, cuddled close to me, and then after a few moments of half-asleep breathing, I heard her begin to cry quietly. Cupping her chin in my hand, I asked her what was wrong and that was when she told me that she had slept with Greg.
Most guys would be furious about this; I admit that personally, I'm a bulldog. My fiancee is my fiancee, and I'll defend her to the very end. But looking at her, the guilt and the fear and the pain, I just couldn't do it. Couldn't be angry. I still can't. Her own guilt and sadness was punishment enough, if that was what I was going for, which it wasn't. I understood the precarious position she was in, trying to choose between two men who loved her very much and whom she loved just as much, if not more. This shit wasn't easy for me to hear, but I knew it wasn't easy for her to say, either. I'd been watching her struggle with right and wrong, love and hate, want and need for weeks by this point, and really all I felt was a sadness, that I couldn't help and make it easier for her.
And at least she'd had the honesty to tell me the truth.
We didn't talk about it anymore after that morning. She promised me it wouldn't happen again, and I forgave her, and as far as I saw it, we didn't have anything else to talk about. But that night, we were up on the roof and that was when she told me that she had lied to him. That the lie she had told had made him come after her.
My fiancee's a very smart woman, but I hadn't quite expected that. Nor had I expected exactly what she'd chosen to lie about. That, of course, brought up the inevitable discussion about marriage and what she would've said if I'd asked her to marry me. We agreed that five weeks was too soon to get married. She worried about my career, again. I told her to fuck that, and that I always wanted to settle down. She smiled and told me to ask her again someday.
It was the first time we'd ever talked about spending the rest of our lives together. And later, when we were done shooting hoops, we ended up cuddled together on the bed, half-listening to the new Train album, talking about it again. Actually, seriously discussing our future together. Realizing that yeah, we had a long-term future together. It felt good. Really good. And I'm not sure how we got from cuddling and kissing to having sex, but that was the first time I slept with her.
It's not the first time I've had sex, but it may as well have been, in that it was a whole new experience than it'd ever been before. I knew she was scared. I knew she thought I'd see the scar she's got and not want to touch her. I had to guide her through a lot, but I didn't mind. It was slow, gentle, very careful. I wanted that for her. I didn't want her to feel like anything less than what she was, which is the woman that I still love. Maybe I was trying to erase the memory of waking up alone in a cheap hotel that previous morning.
The first time I slept with my fiancee was the day I realized I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. That belief hasn't changed, and it never will.
Muse: Josh Lucas
Fandom: RPF
Word Count: 754
Josh: You did what?
Brittany: I told him you'd asked me to marry you. I thought it might force him to get over me. Or at least to make up his mind. That was how I ended up going down to see him. That was why it happened.
Josh: Good idea, but not well executed. [pauses] Just out of curiosity, then, if I did ask you to marry me, what would you say?
The first time I slept with my fiancee was the same day I laid out her ex-boyfriend for hurting her. More accurately, for sleeping with her the night before, and then ditching her in some hotel in Princeton, New Jersey.
I remember her slipping into bed at something like six in the morning and trying to pry her pillow away from me. Blearily, I looked over at her and smiled before I finally surrendered it. She snatched it back, cuddled close to me, and then after a few moments of half-asleep breathing, I heard her begin to cry quietly. Cupping her chin in my hand, I asked her what was wrong and that was when she told me that she had slept with Greg.
Most guys would be furious about this; I admit that personally, I'm a bulldog. My fiancee is my fiancee, and I'll defend her to the very end. But looking at her, the guilt and the fear and the pain, I just couldn't do it. Couldn't be angry. I still can't. Her own guilt and sadness was punishment enough, if that was what I was going for, which it wasn't. I understood the precarious position she was in, trying to choose between two men who loved her very much and whom she loved just as much, if not more. This shit wasn't easy for me to hear, but I knew it wasn't easy for her to say, either. I'd been watching her struggle with right and wrong, love and hate, want and need for weeks by this point, and really all I felt was a sadness, that I couldn't help and make it easier for her.
And at least she'd had the honesty to tell me the truth.
We didn't talk about it anymore after that morning. She promised me it wouldn't happen again, and I forgave her, and as far as I saw it, we didn't have anything else to talk about. But that night, we were up on the roof and that was when she told me that she had lied to him. That the lie she had told had made him come after her.
My fiancee's a very smart woman, but I hadn't quite expected that. Nor had I expected exactly what she'd chosen to lie about. That, of course, brought up the inevitable discussion about marriage and what she would've said if I'd asked her to marry me. We agreed that five weeks was too soon to get married. She worried about my career, again. I told her to fuck that, and that I always wanted to settle down. She smiled and told me to ask her again someday.
It was the first time we'd ever talked about spending the rest of our lives together. And later, when we were done shooting hoops, we ended up cuddled together on the bed, half-listening to the new Train album, talking about it again. Actually, seriously discussing our future together. Realizing that yeah, we had a long-term future together. It felt good. Really good. And I'm not sure how we got from cuddling and kissing to having sex, but that was the first time I slept with her.
It's not the first time I've had sex, but it may as well have been, in that it was a whole new experience than it'd ever been before. I knew she was scared. I knew she thought I'd see the scar she's got and not want to touch her. I had to guide her through a lot, but I didn't mind. It was slow, gentle, very careful. I wanted that for her. I didn't want her to feel like anything less than what she was, which is the woman that I still love. Maybe I was trying to erase the memory of waking up alone in a cheap hotel that previous morning.
The first time I slept with my fiancee was the day I realized I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. That belief hasn't changed, and it never will.
Muse: Josh Lucas
Fandom: RPF
Word Count: 754