good times. good times. yeah.

Mar 16, 2006 03:15

I am not F***ing "turbulent"!!!!

I am totally speechless. okay,okay, not TOTALLY.....

So, at my dear sister's urging I went online to eHarmony (shut it with the laughing) and filled out that survey. An hour later (sheesh, I feel like I wrote a term paper) this bullshit message pops up at the end that says:
Unfortunately, we are not able to make our profiles work for you. Our matching model could not accurately predict with whom you would be best matched. This occurs for about 20% of potential users, so 1 in 5 people simply will not benefit from our service.
Bastards. I am totally dateable! I am just not going to be a boy-crazy disney princess ribbons and curls kinda girlfriend. I am a friend first and foremost.

THEN I read my personality and compatability profiles to tell me about who I am and who I should date.....

This is where it gets really funny.
Humour: Your ideal mate is the kind of man who sometimes likes to entertain people. He occasionally enjoys telling jokes, making people laugh with things like wordplay, one-liners or satirical observations about friends and family.
How dull. Sometimes. Occasionally. He sounds like a real hoot and a half. Zzzzzzz

Your ideal mate is someone who loves children and wants them to play a significant role in his life.
WHAAAAAAT? I am glad they didn't use this information to set me up!!! Shouldn't I be enough for someone! At 22, don't expect me to jump for joy with the idea of being the mommy-diciplinarian-responsible-decisionmaker-nosewiper-laundrywasher person. Dads (from what I have observed) get off SOOOO easy. Not to say that one day....

Mood Management: Others describe him as the kind of person who will stay out of your way if needed but who will be there if you feel like talking. He has a tolerant nature and isn't likely to overreact to your moods."
What are you not-so-subtley hinting at, eh?

Obstreperousness: Your ideal mate is someone who isn't afraid to voice his opinion and appreciates the fact that you do the same. He won't be surprised if you disagree with him or argue your position. However, the two of you will be able to appreciate each others commitment to being honest rather than "politically correct," and shared emphasis on substance over style.
Okay, that's great. Super. So I am tactless and offensive. Gotcha. Duly noted.

Anger Management: Your ideal mate is someone who can appreciate your assertive personality. He doesn't mind a few "rough edges," and an handle your occasional outbursts. Friends may find your relationship turbulent, but your disagreements should blow over quickly as long as you both maintain a level of mutual respect.
Excuse you? I may be hot-tempered and opinionated (at times) but honestly! I can be quite mild mannered, even painfully SHY at times, thankyouverymuch.

This was all very amusing to me at 3am.
Previous post Next post
Up
[]